Heatwave
by ebbtide
Summary: AU. Snape and Harry must learn to work together as the young wizard deals with his new place in the wizarding world after the death of Voldemort. *Sorry, for the confusion. There are only six chapters. The story is complete*
1. Chapter 1

HEAT WAVE

By Ebbtide Cheque

DISCLAIMER: First of all, I do not have any copyright or personal ownership of the Harry Potter Universe. I simply find it fascinating and wish to play with the characters in a story of my own. I'll only romp with them - maybe whump a few - but I promise not to use this to make any money, etc, etc. J.K. Rowlings has sole ownership of the Harry Potter ...stuff.

AUTHOR NOTE -- This is totally A.U.

The dungeon stones were warmed from the intense heat wave outside the castle. Professor Severus Snape stalked down the hall in a black t-shirt and shorts, it being much to hot for his usual cloak and robe. His lips were pressed together in a thin line and anger radiated from him in waves. Although his mouth never seemed to move, a constant stream of curses echoed off the walls around him. He repeated a single word after each, _Potter_.

It took him mere minutes to reach the Headmaster's office at the brisk pace he kept. Once there he glared daggers into the gargoyles stone eyes and spat out the password.

"Trick-r-Treat."

The stairway opened for him with a grind, and he stepped on for the short ride up to Dumbledore's office. The door _banged_ off the wall from the force of his push when he barged in.

"Headmaster, I demand an explanation!" There was no civility in Snape's tone.

Professor Dumbledore looked over his glasses at the intruding teacher. He didn't say anything right away, but instead motioned for Snape to have a seat and then, once Snape had complied, the old man held out a bowl of sweets.

"Would you like some?" He asked.

Snape ground his teeth in impatience and merely shook his head. He did not trust himself to speak - too many unforgivable words were running through his mind and, no matter how erksome Dumbledore could be, the man did not deserve that.

The Headmaster relaxed back into his chair and studied the younger man before him. "I must say that I did not expect to see you out of the dungeons this summer...with the heat wave out-."

Snape cut the man off with an abrupt wave of his arm. "It's this infernal heat wave that I have come to speak with you about. I know that it is your doing and I am at my wits end! The dungeons are no longer a safe retreat for me, the heat has penetrated them as well. You must turn away this weather. What is it all for, anyway?" He demanded, shooting the older man a dangerous look.

Dumbledore sighed heavily and slumped a little, a sad light appeared in his eyes. "I did not mean to cause you so much discomfort, my friend." He said finally. "However, it came to my attention this last school year that Hogwarts is unneccessarily rainy, and that this type of weather pattern makes students prone to meloncholy."

"That may be true." Snape growled. "But it is summer, Headmaster. Why must you keep it up now."

"Why, for Harry of course. He has stayed on this summer to prepare for the seventh year NEWT exams. I expect you did not know he was still here - it has been a long time since you were out of your dungeons." The Headmaster said.

Snape tilted his head to one side as he thought this through. "So, Potter is here, is he?" He muttered under his breath.

It _had_ been the welps fault, he thought victoriously. Everything could be traced back to the actions of the Infernal-Boy-Who-Continued-To-Cause-Problems. Harry Potter.

"Is he being tutored by McGonagall?" Snape asked curiously.

He knew it was not uncommon for failing students to stay behind the summer before their seventh year, but he did not know that Potter was so badly off in any of his classes. Save potions, of course. That boy could not spot a decent potion if he had it forced down his throat!

"No, I am tutoring him. I had meant to speak with you this week about teaching him some practical potions while he is here."

Snape growled at the implications. "No."

He held the Headmaster's gaze, not giving an inch.

SSHPSSHPSSHPSSHPSSHPSSHPSSHPSSHPSSHPSSHP

Harry Potter sat in the Gryffindor common room studying his transfiguration text book. His mind kept going back to the day of summer leave.

_FLASHBACK!_

_Harry said goodbye to his two best friends, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley, at the train station and then warily made his way to the parking lot. He instantly spotted his Uncle's vehicle and readjusted his shoulder bag before he walked over to it. His Aunt Petunia sat in the driver's seat, an angry sneer twisting her face. _

_"Get in boy! What are you waiting for?" She called through the open window. Her shrill voice caused people passing by to stare. She glared back at them. "Now look what you've done. They see you for the freak you are - everyone's looking!" _

_Harry hurriedly put his things in the back and got in, buckling up. _

_"You should thank me for coming instead of your Uncle. You know how he gets when you do _things_."_

_Harry barely stopped himself from commenting that it was her that everyone had been starring at, not him. _

_"Thank you for picking me up, Aunt Petunia." He said obediently. _

_A half an hour later they pulled up to the unremarkable house of 4 Privet Drive and Harry carried his things inside and up the stairs to his room. Hedgewig was staying with Ron that summer so that she could get plenty of fresh food and exercise. _

_After setlling in, Harry reluctantly went downstairs to start on the list of chores that his Aunt would have ready. On the way down he passed Dudley who was coming up the stairs. The older boy laughed evilly and with a great push, sent Harry tumbling down the stairs._

_"See what you get for coming back, Freak!" Dudley whispered fiercly. "Should've stayed with the rest of your kind."_

_Harry stood up and brushed himself off - a pange of loneliness burned his eyes and he shook his head to stop the tears from pooling. He missed his friends so much and it was only the first day of leave. He knew that more of the same treatment was all he had to look forward to, worse once his Uncle got home from work. _

_It was late that evening when Uncle Vernon arrived. Harry had the table set and dinner ready to be served when the large, mean man came in the front door._

_"Good evening, Darling." Aunt Petunia gushed as she sloppily kissed her husband. "How was your work today?" _

_He muttered something gruffly that Harry could not - and made no effort to - hear. _

_"No thanks to the Freak." _

_That, Harry heard. He glanced quickly over to his Uncle and waited for more insults to come, but Vernon had sat down with his back to the kitchen area. _

_"I expected a raise, but then I got a call from some of those Freaks and the raise went to someone else."_

_Harry knew that his Uncle must be reffering to a Wizard or Witch, but the only ones he knew with telephone access and the ability to use the device, was the Weasley family. He wanted to ask who had called and why, but dared not. He could not afford to draw any more attention from his irrate Uncle. Still, he kept a sharp ear on the table conversation as he started cleaning the kitchen up._

_"Why would _they _call you at work, dear?" Aunt Petunia asked in a low tone. She leaned forward and her eyes kept twitching left and then right as if she expected a Wizard to suddenly appear. "Was it...HIM." _

_Harry glanced up at that suspicious referrence. His Aunt's long face was void of color and her hands were shaking slightly. _

_Uncle Vernon shook his head firmly. "No. It was some Freak called Lucius..." He hesitated a moment as if trying to remember. "Malfoy." _

_Dudley cried out in surprise when the glass that Harry had been drying fell to the floor and splintered into a million pieces. _

_END FLASHBACK!_

The memory of that broken glass scattered across the floor remained fixed in his mind's eye as Harry tried to get his emotions under control. An unwanted tear slid down his cheek, but he didn't notice.

A Death Eater - Lucius Malfoy - had come to number 4 Privet Drive that night...only Harry had survived. The sound of a door being blasted off it's hinges followed by the dying screams of his Aunt had alerted him to the danger he had been in. There hadn't been enough time to get to Uncle Vernon or Dudley. It had been over so fast.

_FLASHBACK_

_Harry's hands were white from the intense grip on the handle of his wand. Footsteps sounded up the stairs and a quiet muttering in Latin, then the masked, robed figure with flowing white-blonde hair had appeared in his doorway. _

_The teenage boy raised his wand. "Expel-." _

_"Stupefy!" _

_Harry felt himself falling before he had even finished the spell. _

_END FLASHBACK!_

At the very moment that Harry thought his life was over, Dumbledore had appeared beside him and the pull of a portkey had taken over his senses.

That had been two days before. Two days after summer break and everything he had ever known no longer existed. His family - however dysfunctional and small it may have been - was gone. Another tear followed the first and he sniffled away the urge to sob. Harry shook his head and wiped at his eyes. He would not be so weak; he had survived much worse than this in his life.

He stood, trying to focus his mind on anything other than the overwhelming feeling of loss. For some reason, over the past day he had become convinced that if they had lived the Dursley's would have eventually grown fond of him. This caused him to regret their deaths even more. Everyone he ever cared for died, except Remus Lupin, but he was never around anymore...always off on secret order missions.

"Harry, I thought I might find you up here. Why don't you come down to lunch, there is something that I would like to discuss with you."

Harry jerked around at the unexpected sound of Dumbledore's voice. Instead of finding the Headmaster at the common room door, he saw a strange bird-like patronus glowing in midair.

"Yes, sir."

The patronus nodded to him politely before flying off at an incredible speed. Harry stared at the place it had been in shock. He had not known that a patronus could be used to send messages. He finally decided that it worked for Dumbledore because he was such a powerful wizard.

He grabbed up his robe from where he had lain it on the back of the couch and threw it on as he hurried past the portrait.

"Have a good lunch, Dear." The Fat Lady said.

Harry stopped short - the term "dear" had been a special favorite of his Aunt's and hearing a woman's voice saying it brought a flood of memories through his mind. He saw his Aunt standing at the top of the stairs shouting orders down to him; he heard her welcoming home his Uncle; he felt one of her rare caresses as she congratulated him for a job well done when he had impressed the visiting business man with his cooking.

Harry touched the back of his head, where _she_ had touched him. For a brief moment he almost felt like she was still there, that somehow he could still contact her, then the feeling was gone and bitter emptiness was all he had left.

"I am so sorry." He whispered into the still air of the deserted hallway. "It's my fault that you're dead."

The sound of the portrait door closing brought him back to the present and Harry hurried down to the Great Hall where he knew Dumbledore would be waiting for him, hopefully with some news on the Death Eater's movements.

When he entered the Great Hall, Harry was surprised to see Professor Snape sitting beside Dumbledore with an angry sneer firmly fixed in place. Harry felt his fists clench at the sight of the man's black clothing. They reminded him of the Death Eater uniform Lucius wore that night. With the unusual warmth of this summer, he had seen little of the disagreeable man.

"You wanted to speak with me, sir?" Harry asked Dumbledore once he reached the head table.

The old man nodded. "Yes, Harry, my boy, take a seat here." He motioned to the chair between himself and Snape. "And then we'll let the house elves serve us before we do anything else."

Harry reluctantly sat in the offered place, he unconsciously leaned a little more towards the Headmaster, wanting to stay as far away from the Professor as possible.

He had barely sat down, when suddenly plates laden with luscious food appeared in front of them. The plate directly in front of Harry had a serving of something that he had never seen before, but it looked very good so he started eating, forgetting for a moment that Snape was present.

"You have the most deplorable eating habits, Potter."

Harry paused. "Excuse me?"

Snape pointed to a small fork that Harry hadn't noticed. "That is what you are suppose to eat it with, not your fingers!"

The teenage boy looked down at the tiny buscuit like morsel that he held between his thumb and forefinger. He didn't see how anyone could eat it with a fork, the crust seemed much too flakey, like it would fall apart if someone tried.

"I'll eat it however I want, thank you." He sniped back. It felt good to vent for a change, even if it was over something so trivial.

There was a growl from Snape at this impertinence, but Harry didn't look over to see the expression on the older man's face.

"Now, now, gentlemen." The Headmaster interrupted before house points could be lost. "I don't think that this is very advantageous to us, considering what we are here to talk about."

"What would that be?" Harry asked curiously.

"Severus has offered to tutor you in potions for a few hours everyday since you are here for the summer." Dumbledore answered nonchalantly.

Harry's mouth dropped open at this announcement. "He what?"

His heart sank even lower as he realized that things could, in fact, always get worse.

--

"Now, Potter, I expect you to pay close attention to everything I say. Take notes, if you think that you need to, but do not interrupt me when I am speaking and do not - yes, what?" Snape demanded impatiently.

Harry lowered his hand. "What exactly will you be teaching me? Applied potions? Basic formula?" He hoped it wasn't the latter.

"I will assess your individual weaknessess and we will improve on those areas." Snape responded.

"Okay, what about Occlumancy?" Harry winced as he thought of the pensieve disaster the year before.

Snape smiled in a predatory manner causing the boy to shiver. "Are you asking for me to teach you?"

Harry quickly shook his head quickly. He took a step backward. "No, s-sir."

"Good, becuase not even the Headmaster with all of his considerable skills could not persuade me to do so."

Harry exhaled in relief. He looked around the room and his gaze fell on a cauldron that had been set out with supplies evenly lined on either side.

"What will we start on?"

To his surprise, Harry found himself looking forward to doing something that wouldn't remind him of the Dursleys. Anything to get him thinking about other things would be a welcomed break for the Boy-Who-lived.

Snape led the way over to the table that the cauldron was set up on. Harry watched with rapt attention as the older man explained every step carefully as he began a simple wart removal potion.

"Since the room temperature is much hotter than normal, _due to this infernal heatwave_, the fire must be doused five minutes ealier than the directions demand." Snape said.

Hours passed as Harry learned more about the world of potions. It obsorbed him completely and before he knew it, dinner time arrived. Even Professor Snape seemed surprised that time had possed so quickly.

"Until tomorrow, Potter." He said curtly, the sneer firmly fixed in place.

Harry ran up to the tower to change out of his potion stained clothing before going down to dinner. During the meal, he found occasion to ask Snape more questions about the things that he had learned that day, and that night he went to bed with a contented sigh.

--

"Professor, do muggles become ghosts when they die?"

Snape looked up sharply. Harry sat a few feet away stirring a pot of honeybee eggs as they simmered, his face a mask of concentration. Snape was not even sure if the boy was aware he had voiced the question aloud. After a brief hesitation, he answered honestly.

"I am unsure, Potter. To my knowledge, one must be magical to a significant extent before such a transition can be succesfully achieved at death. No, I do not think that they can." He hesitated again, before pressing on. "I have heard of a muggle heaven where their dead are suppose to live for eternity. Although, I cannot verify the validity of that either. Honestly, I am unsure where muggles go when they are dead."

He waited, studying the boy, to see if there would be any enlightening confession after such a strange question. Harry looked thoughtful for a few seconds, then his face fell and a strange emptiness filled his green eyes.

"Do you wish to talk about it?" Snape asked, his silky voice non-judgemental.

He had seen too much death in his life, and he recognized the signs of grief. A picture of Lily Potter flashed through his mind. Harry shifted uncomfortably on his seat.

"No, that's okay. It's not a big deal, I can handle it myself." The boy's reply was filled with false bravado.

Snape narrowed his eyes at this refusal. Deep in his heart, the potions master felt a stab of pain at the distrust he saw in the teenager's expression. Knowing that he had done nothing to earn trust did little to soften the blow to his pride.

"Fine." He spat out harshly.

Let the little welp deal with it on his own! It's not as if Potter cared about anyone, anyways. The grief was probably over a lost pet - nothing so dramatic as another human. The spoiled brat could just go mope about in his little tower, for all the potion's master cared.

"We are finished for the day." Snape said, taking the stirring spoon out of Harry's hands. "Goodday, Potter."

Harry shot him a stunned look, but did not protest when Snape propelled him forcefully towards the classroom door.

--

Harry stared at the window pane in front of him. Each breath left a small fog on the glass since the summer heat of just days ago had disipated without warning. A large gray cloud covered the sun, rain threatened to follow the ominous rumblings of a nearby storm. Harry rested his head on his arm and tried not to think about his "family". It wasn't working.

_FLASHBACK_

_Aunt Petunia smoothed the non-existent wrinkles on her pink dress and tidied her brunette curles. _

_"Come down, Dear, it is almost time for the show to start. We do not want to be late." She called up the flight of stairs. _

_On the second floor the heavy footsteps of Uncle Vernon stomped from the main bedroom to the stairs and then he appeared coming down them. When he reached the front door, Petunia gave him a loving peck on the cheek as she straightened his bow tie. They left arm in arm._

_Harry had watched the exchange unseen from the living room. Once they were gone he sank into one of the plush chairs, unable to contain the emotions the display had triggered in him. He wished for the hundreth time that he had known his parents. Harry sighed heavily; he didn't even know if they ever really loved each other. A few moving pictures and the Prophecy were all he had left of his parents. Remus had talked of them a number of times, but never for long or in great detail. The subject was hurtful still for the werewolve. _

_Harry wondered if his mother was anything like Aunt Petunia. The woman, although arrogant and controlling, could show love to those that she cared about. Harry had seen Dudley hugged and smothered in motherly kisses more times than he could count. There was so much love that these muggles had to offer, the Boy-Who-Lived only wanted a little._

_END FLASHBACK!_

Now he never would know what it could have been like. Now he would have to live with the fact that they were killed by _his_ enemies. No matter how cruel or insensitive they could be, nobody deserved to die by the hands of a Death Eater. Harry shuddered and rolled away from the window.

Outside the sky gave way to tears and the parched grass looked up hungrily into the darkening light.

--

Harry trudged down to the dungeons the next afternoon arriving just in time for his scheduled lessons. After the cold dismissal two days before, he had half expected Snape to call the whole thing off. Then he had received a written note from the potion's master with the time and date of his next lesson.

"Good evening, sir." He greeted the teacher civially.

He did not want to get sent away early today. Depression weighed to heavy on his heart and he knew that potions would distract him enough for it to lift. Possibly, it was the only thing that could. Maybe that had been Dumbledore's plan all along, he mused silently.

"You will start on a skin purifying potion, Potter." Snape said, handing the boy a large instruction book. "You will do it alone today."

Harry took the heavy book and sat it on the table. Carefully, he got out all of the ingredients that he would need. The main potion ingredient required a familiar one hour and fifty-five minutes of heating before the rest could be added. They waited the time away in silence, Harry focused on the time and Snape grading papers at a nearby desk. Once the time was up, the boy reached for the first set of three ingredients that would be sifted in together.

"Isn't this the same as the wart removal?" He asked, his green eyes skimming across the pile of familiar ingredients.

"No. It is not! If you had paid any attention last time, you would know that." Snape snapped.

Harry hung his head, stung by the Professor's harsh words. He had hoped that they would make it through this lesson until the end, now it didn't look like that was going to happen.

"I'm sorry, sir. I - I must've forgotten." He mumbled the apology. "It won't happen again."

Snape huffed impatiently. "See that it doesn't, Potter. Your family may accept partial effort, but I do not."

The older man turned away then to pick up the potions instructions. Harry used that moment of privacy to mask the hurt that the referrence to his "family" had brought to the surface. More memories - these ones less than sunshine-and-roses - flashed through his mind.

_FLASHBACK_

_"Get the work done, Freak! Vernon's friends will be here soon and I want the place spotless." Aunt Petunia's grating voice shrieked from the living room._

_A seven-year-old Harry bent over the floor, scrubbing until the tiles shown like new. He had been working since dawn to make sure every inch of the downstairs was clean for the expected arrival of Vernon's friends. It was a wonder to the small boy that his Uncle had any friends at all. He definently didn't see anything _friendly about _the mean man._

_"Hurry up, Freak!" _

_Harry scrubbed harder._

_END FLASHBACK!_

"Did you hear a word I just said, Potter, or were you too busy day-dreaming again?" Professor Snape spit out the question.

Harry stumbled into a desk as his mind snapped back to the present.

"Yes - No - I'm sorry." The words tumbled out of his mouth. For one aweful moment he had thought it was his Uncle talking. This seemed silly now and he had to stop himself from groaning, this was not working out well at all.

Harry blushed at the penetrating stare that Snape fixed him with. Onxy eyes studied green. Finally, Snape shook his head.

"I doubt if you will get anything substantial done today. Go back to the tower, if you cannot get this under control, I'm afraid I will have to suspend lessons indefinently.

"Sir, I'll try harder, really I will - it won't happen again, I promise." Harry begged. He did not want to go back to the lonely tower.

"I will not have my time wasted, Potter!" The Potions Master threw his arm out, black robes flapping, and pointed to the door. "Out!"

Harry's shoulder's slumped and he bent down to pick up his bag. When he reached the door and was about to leave, he hesitated a second and glanced back over his shoulder.

"I really am sorry, sir." He said queitly.

Snape turned back to the potion on the table and did not look up or acknowledge the words, his face hidden behind a viel of shiny black hair. With a heavy sigh, and a heavy heart, Harry left the dungeons. He made his way to the tower, where boredness and memories awaited.

--

"How are your lessons going, Severus?" The Headmaster asked a few days later during their afternoon tea.

Snape shook his head in distate. "I do not know if I am truly helping him. At times, I can almost see him starting to understand - and then it is like he simply shuts down and does not even try anymore." He hesitated. "I must admit that I have sent him away on more than one occasion."

"It is unfortunate. I thought he would be over the depression by now." The old man remarked. "After so many days of distraction...I had hoped."

Snape looked at him. "Depression? Why would the Boy-Who-Lived be depressed? Doesn't he have all of Hogwarts catering to him? And on a _summer_ no less."

Dumbledore sucked in a shaky breath. "Is it true that you do not know?" The wrinkled hand holding his tea shook and he set it down so that it would not spill. "How could this be?"

Snape sat forward, searching the Headmaster's eyes anxiously. "What is it? What should I know?"

"The boy's family is dead - killed by Death Eaters. If Voldemort did not tell you this, he must be suspicious."

Snape paled as he realized what this would mean. "The Dark Lord no longer trusts me."

"It is what I fear, if he did not tell you something such as this." Dumbledore nodded. "The boy's family was slaughtered the night of summer break. I barely got him out alive through the use of a portkey."

Snape sat back in his chair, stunned. "I think I may have been too hard on the boy, Headmaster." He admitted softly, sudden realization dawning.

Dumbledore smiled softly. "You have plenty of time to make up for any harshness on your part, now that you know." The old man sighed heavily. "However, I fear for your safety, my friend. I can no longer ask you to spy for the order. Any contact with the Dark Lord or his followers could prove disasterous for you." The Headmaster's eyes shone with worry. "We will figure out a way to stifle his call. I will work on a way to release you from him, Severus, I promised you I would when the time was right. It seems that time has been chosen for us."

--

Severus Snape walked up the stone stairs that led to the Fat Lady's portrait. He muttered under his breath about the foolhardy Gryffindor behavior of one _Harry Potter_.

"Damn hero complex." He said to the floor.

"And what business do you have in my common room?" The Fat Lady asked suspisciously when he finally reached the base of her frame.

"I am here to see Harry." He announced.

She looked sad. "Poor boy, I'm afraid he's not here."

"Do you know where he went." Snape asked shortly.

She frowned at the tone. "No. You might try asking some of the other portaits. They get around a lot more than I do, they might know where he is."

Snape sighed as he realized that finding the boy would be harder than he had anticipated. In a flurry of black robes, he turned on his heel and started back down the stairs.

He finally found Harry, curled up in the library with Quidditch Through the Ages tucked up to his chest.

"I need to talk with you, Potter." He cut to the chase.

Harry looked up. "With me?" He asked nonplus.

Snape crossed his arms over his chest. "Yes, with you!"

Harry shut the book and set it down on a shelf. He stood and moved to leave.

"We can talk here..." Snape started uncertainly. "If it would make you more comfortable."

The teenage boy nodded and sat back down. Snape used his wand to levitate another chair closer and then he sat as well. A hard silence fell between them. Finally, Snape cleared his throat.

"I am not very good at this, I apologize."

Harry's mouth fell open. For a brief moment he thought someone had used a polyjuice potion to trick him, or that Professor Snape had somehow been infected with a Imperius curse. Why would this man apologize to him?

Snape shifted in his seat and his gaze jumped all over the room as he focused on everything except the boy in front of him. This would be much harder than he had thought.

"The Headmaster told me about your family this morning. I hadn't know."

Harry relaxed at this. Now at least he knew _why _Snape was acting so out of character.

"Weren't you there?" The words came out of his mouth before he could stop them. He winced and waited for the Potions Master to go cold.

"No."

There was no anger in the older man's expression or voice. Harry swallowed.

"Lucius tried to kill me. It was him who killed my...family. I thought there had to be other Death Eaters there, but I didn't see them." He swallowed again, this time to hold back the bile rising in his throat as his Aunt's dying scream played through his head accompanied by his mother's. They blended into a strange harmony and suddenly he couldn't breath.

He became aware of firm hands on his shoulders and a voice by his ear, but he couldn't understand the words. A roaring sound filled his head, it felt like it was about to explode. Colors swam together, he could just make out a black blob in front of him, but he couldn't force himself to focus on it. Never before had his emotions got so out of control. He struggled futiley against the pull of darkness, the screams seemed to go on forever. There was no way to stop them. He threw his hands over his ears and clenched his jaw against the memories of death.

"Harry, breath!"

The yell broke through his panic and he sucked in a long breath. His lungs felt like they were on fire and his throat felt raw, like he had been screaming too. He shut his eyes tight, wanting his memories - his reality - to just disapear. Maybe, if he wished it long enough, it would happen. He stayed like that, breathing in sharp gasps.

"Harry, calm down. You are at Hogwarts - no one is screaming." The voice seemed to be coming from far away. "You are safe now."

He kept his eyes closed, not wanting to face what he knew waited for him when he opened them again. He recognized the voice now, it was Snape. How was he ever going to live this down? The Potions Master would surely think him weak and pathetic after this unprovoked display.

The hands on his shoulders moved, one started rubbing circles on his back and the other checked his pulse rate.

"You are safe now." Snape repeated quietly.

Another shaky breath filled his lungs and Harry opened his eyes. He didn't want to look at the teacher, didn't want to face his fears.

"You have nothing to be ashamed of, anyone would cry." Snape said softly.

Harry's brow furrowed in confusion, then he felt the wetness on his cheek. Tears were sliding unbidden down his face. He blushed again, this time feeling totally mortified by the situation. He had never cried in front of anyone in his entire life, and now here he was in the arms of a teacher who hated his guts - crying for the loss of people who never cared for him.

"I'm sorry, sir." He said roughly, swiping at his face with a sleeve of his robe.

"As I said, there is nothing to be ashamed of. Grief is natural...anyone in your position would react the same."

Harry wondered what exactly his position was in the Potion Master's eyes. "It's just so hard." His confession surprised even him, and he felt the hand on his back freeze at the heart-felt words.

"I know." Snape confided softly. "It is hard to lose a loved one, and this is not the first for you, which would be even harder."

"They didn't love me." Harry admitted to himself. "They never would...and I think." His breath hitched. "That makes it even worse."

--

"I take it, you talked to the boy?" Dumbledore asked during their next evening tea.

"Yes." Snape replied carefully. "I believe he holds himself responsible for their deaths. He did say something strange though, he said 'they never loved him'." He looked up at the Headmaster. "Do you have any idea what he meant by that? I tried to get him to open up more, but grief counciling is not one of my strongest ...areas of expertise. He left immediately after saying those words to me. I haven't seen him since. The Red Baron informed me he was occupied in the Gryffindor Tower."

Dumbledore nodded at this news, as if he already knew. "I will speak with the boy, but I would appreciate it if you continued to show him support this summer. Whatever animosity you felt against his father - I sense that it no longer dictates your attitude towards the boy, make sure he sees that as well."

"No one should have to suffer through this kind of loss alone, that does not mean that I _like _Potter." Snape said adimently, setting his tea cup down on the table. "And I will not be manipulated by you, old man. I will help the boy - I would help any Hogwarts student - but that does not make me his _friend_." He sneered out the word.

With that, the Potions Master said his goodbye and stalked out of the room in his usual fashion. Dumbledore watched the door close behind the former Death Eater; he listened as the stairs groaned their way down a level, then he smiled. A full, mischeivious grin that stretched from ear to ear. A bright twinkle flashed in his wize blue eyes.

"Friendship forms in the most unlikely of places, Fawkes." He glanced over at the phoenix at rest on it's perch. The fire red bird raised an eyelid curiously, and the man continued. "I do believe they will reach an understanding."

His grin fell, and more serious matters clouded the temporary twinkle from his eyes. "However, there is more than one life to be saved here. The cure to Severus' problems may lie with you, my pet." He stood and carefully picked up the bird in his arms, stroking the warm feathers.

--

Harry sighed heavily and tried not to think about what had happened between him and Snape in the library. He had been at his weakest, emotionally, and how Snape used that information could prove disasterous. The random shadows of kindness the teacher had shown him over the past week had left its mark, and now Harry felt torn over whether to trust the man or not. If Snape was sincere in his attempts to help, Harry knew that he could use that help...if it was a ploy of some kind-. He shook off that disturbing thought.

A sense of loneliness fell over him, smothering him. He pushed up from the chair he had been lounging in and began to pace across the length of the common room. The lessons with McGonagall had stopped the day before when she had been called back home for a family emergency. He assumed it was nothing to urgent - as she had promised a soon return. With the extra time on his hands, Harry knew he had to do something to keep his mind busy. Searching the castle for more hidden passageways to add to the Murauder's Map had taken less than a day with the help of the portraits and ghosts. They had been all to willing to help with his endeavor, but no significantly useful passages had been located. Aparantly, Wormtail, Padfoot, Moony and Prongs had discovered all of the good ones.

He smiled a little at his first memory of the map; The excitement that came from knowing he could go anywhere he liked; The hatred when he saw Petigrew's name scrolled in tiny letters; The saddness when he realized that Sirius would never see the map again.

With a heartfelt sigh, he sat back on the chair. Pacing just took too much energy and he didn't want to think about his dad, Sirius or the map any longer. He spent to much time thinking.

"Harry, someone is here to see you."

Dumbledore's cheerful voice called from the doorway. Harry looked over and saw the same bird-like patronus.

"Come down to the Great Hall."

This time it did not give him time to reply before flying back through the doorway. Harry stood, wondering who could be there to see him, and went out the door after it.

--

"Harry, it's great to see you!" Remus Lupin said.

Harry smiled up at his father's best friend as they withdrew from a long hug. The werewolve was thinner than ever and his patched clothing fell off of him in folds.

"How are you doing, really, Remus?" Harry asked in concern, eyeing the man's significantly slight frame.

Remus laughed. "It's not as bad as it looks, Harry. I've just been very busy these last few months..." He paused. "I heard about your family, and I am so sorry."

Harry looked up into the honest brown eyes. "It's okay. I'm okay." He lied readily. For a moment he didn't know who he was lying to, Remus or himself. "I've been keeping busy, taking extra classes. Even Snape has been teaching me some more advanced potions."

He smiled and tried to make everything appear normal. The last thing Harry needed was for the last person he loved to fall ill from concern - and if there was one person in the world who could, it would be Lupin. The man's protective tendancies were inhanced by his werewolve instincts.

"I'm glad to hear it, Harry." Remus said with a grin of his own.

Dumbledore clapped the man on the shoulder and started towards the door. "I'll just leave you two alone, I'm sure that you have a lot to talk about."

Once the Headmaster had left, Remus and Harry sat down on a bench at the Hufflepuff table. Harry toyed with the yellow House cloth, while they talked about unimportant things like the weather and Quidditch scores from the sixth year finale game.

"Have you finished grieving?" Remus asked unexpectedly.

Harry watched the man from under his long, unruly bangs. "I've grieved - yeah, I'm finished - I mean, of course, it's been almost two weeks."

"Harry," Lupin said softly. "Time has nothing to do with it. I still feel the loss of your parents, and Sirius...everyday." The man fell silent.

The Boy-Who-Lived shifted uncomfortably and winced at the mention of Sirius.

"Why don't we go to Hogsmead?" Harry asked, to change the subject. "I really have been meaning to go, and you aren't around very often. I need to get some things before school starts and -."

Remus cut off his babbling with an amused chuckle. "Of course, I'll take you to Hogsmead. Let's just get us some coats. Accio Harry's Coat. Accio Lupin's Coat." His wand waved in the air in a circular pattern.

Harry smiled fondly at the man as they both shrugged into their coats. Maybe today wouldn't be so bad after all, he thought hopefully. It wouldn't be until later that he would remember the Potions lesson with Snape that afternoon.

--

"Where is that infernal brat?" Snape demanded of the potion he was stirring rather too vigerously. "Can't even show up on time for a simple lesson, how does he ever expect to defeat the Dark Lord." He muttered.

An echoe of running feet sounded suddenly outside the classroom door and then there was a timid nock. Snape rolled his eyes at the ceiling.

"Come in, Potter. You've taken long enough _getting_ here, I do not need you wasting the next hour directly outside the door."

Harry walked in uncertainly. "I'm sorry, I lost track of the time, Professor."

"Ah, so it's Professor now, is it." Snape said snarkily. "Remember that next time you address me."

"Yes, sir - Professor." Harry corrected.

Snape nodded in satisfaction. "Now, today we will be assessing your knowledge of healing potions."

Harry felt a little encouraged by this, he felt confident of his abilities in this area. After all, he had drunk so many healing potions in his life, he knew most of them by taste and smell. He started towards the work table, convinced this would be a walk in the park.

--

Harry slumped down in his chair at the dinner table that night. Potions had been far from a walk in the park - it had been more like a drive through rush hour. He hadn't known which way was up by the end of Snape's "assessment".

"You seem tired, are you feeling alright, Harry?" Remus asked in concern.

Harry tried to smile brightly, he only half succeeded. "Yeah, I'm fine. Potions just took a lot out of me, that's all."

There was a snort from Snape's end of the table, but the Potion's Master refused to elaborate.

"When are you leaving again?" Harry asked as he buttered a piece of bread. He hated having to ask that question. It seemed so ...final.

Remus ate a spoonful of his soup before answering. "I will be leaving tonight." His tone softened. "I am sorry that I couldn't stay longer."

Harry felt like he'd been hit in the stomache. He had been expecting the man to stay at least a few days. He shut his eyes tightly, wishing 0away the world for a brief second, then he opened them again and tried to smile through the pain.

"Well, it was really, really good to see you, Remus." He added softly. "I'll miss you."

Remus reached over and ruffled the boy's dark hair. "I know. I'll miss you too."

--

"I'll miss you." Harry said softly.

Severus heard the longing, fear and heartache in that single sentence. He stop mid-chew and studied the young man. Harry's smile appeared forced as was the cheerful expression and light words that followed. Under all of the pretense, Severus could see the wounded, grieving soul of a lost child. How he had ever missed it, he did not know, but at that second of recognition he vowed to do anything it took to see that look gone forever. No child deserved to feel that much pain, not even James Potter's welp. For one second, the Potion's Master thought about re-thinking his hatred for the boy...then the werewolve and Harry stood and left the room and whatever flicker of compassion he had felt died out. There was no way that he would give up the decade long grudge against Potter. Any Potter.

--

Harry watched the moon rise slowly through the sky. Remus had left hours before, with a teary farewell and promises of more visits soon. Harry felt a sob catch in the back of his throat. A strange foreboding left him with the feeling that he would never see his friend again.

Everyone left him.

With a troubled sigh, Harry rolled over in his bed and fell into a dark sleep haunted by nightmares.

--

Snape ate a bite out of a cookie as he turned the page of the potions theory book he was reading. Suddenly, his arm burst into flames of pain. He lunged from the chair and grabbed a handful of floo powder. He knew the routine.

"Dumbledore's Office." He said through clenched teeth when he stepped into the fireplace.

Instantly he was tumbling out of the Headmaster's floo, ash flying around him. At his desk, Dumbledore looked up concerned.

"Severus?" He asked.

Snape stumbled over to a chair, his arm held close to his chest as if to ward of the pain. "He is calling me to him."

--

Beads of sweat formed on Harry's face. He twitched in his dream as a vision slowly started to form, taking over his mind.

_"You were correct, my Lord. Severus has not apparated here yet, he _must _be the spy." Lucius Malfoy reported kneeling in front of Harry's line of sight. _

_"He will pay for his treachery." Harry felt his own mouth form the words, but they came out as Voldemort's oily voice. "I will summon all of our number. You, my loyal servant, will fetch Snape to me!"_

_Lucius bowed his head and donned the white mask he had held in one hand. "Yes, my Lord." _

Harry awoke with a start. He jerked up into a sitting position and gasped in panic. They were after Snape! That meant Lucius would come to Hogwarts. The boy got out of bed and stood on shaking legs - the visions always left him disoriented - and started down the stairs to the common room. He could floo the Headmaster from there.

Once at the fire place, Harry grabbed up a handful of silver powder and flung it into the fire, then he stepped in.

"Dumbledore's Office." He enunciated clearly.

He arrived even more unstable than usual. The screams of pain that met his ears almost made him fall to the floor. He clapped both hands over his ears at the disturbing sound. Looking for the source, he saw Professor Snape curled up on a transfigured sofa, his right arm clutched tightly against his body.

"Headmaster!" Harry called out to the older man at Snape's side. "The Death Eater - Voldemort is sending a Death Eater here!"

Snape heard this and his cries of pain ceased momentarily. "Lucius?" He asked, his voice raw.

Harry nodded, his stomache flipping at the pure terror that flashed across the Potion master's face. "Yes. He knows you're a spy...Voldemort is calling all of the Death Eaters to him. He sent Lucius to come and 'retrieve' you." He swallowed against the bile rising in his throat.

"Then we will just have to be ready for him." Dumbledore said, his jaw set in determination. "Fawkes." He called to the phoenix. It swooped into the air and came to land on the old man's shoulder. "Do what you can for Severus, my pet."

The bird nodded it's head and jumped the short space to the sofa, where Snape lay. The mythical bird walked carefully across the man's chest and rested it's head on the man's marked arm. A single tear trickled down it's feathered face and soaked into the dark robes. Instantly, Snape's entire body relaxed.

He breathed in relief. Snape looked up at Dumbledore, a bemused expression on his face. "You didn't know if it would work, did you?" He asked weakly.

Dumbledore smiled grimly. "No. I did not, but we need you to be ready when your former friend arrives."

Snape sat up, his hand resting on Fawke's head for a brief moment. "Thank you, Fawkes." He said softly. The bird bowed it's head in silent acknowledgement and then flew back to it's perch by the Headmaster's desk.

"Do you have a plan, Headmaster?" Harry asked.

--

Voldemort narrowed his red eyes, scanning the courtyard in front of him. A full moon lit the stone arch that led to Hogwarts' main door.

"Spread out. Lucius, bring Severus to me."

Black forms seperated into small pockets of Death Eaters and they all melted into the shadows, save one, which walked forward with wand raised.

"Yes, my lord." Lucius said.

He walked up the stairs and with a forceful Alohamora, entered the school building. Under the combined dark powers of the entire Death Eater clan, the school's massive wards fell as one. Leaving it completely open to attack. With only a few teachers on the ground, and the Potter child, they would not meet too much opposition.

--

"He's in the building. There are at least twenty of them, maybe more. Lucius is alone." Harry reported, his eyes glazed over as a waking vison showed him what Voldemort saw in the dark halls many stories below.

Minerva, Snape, Dumbledore, Madam Pomfrey and Filch all sat around Harry, their eyes fixed in expectation on the young boy. Every living soul in the school had flooed to the saftey of the Headmaster's office and now all they could do was wait. Disconnecting the floo had been the first thing they had done, followed by a myriad of wards for the door and gargoyal guarding it.

"I feel so ...happy." Harry whispered in a monotone voice. His muscles were completely relaxed and he seemed no longer aware of where he was. "So happy...Dumbledore won't expect it ...the boy will be killed. I'll kill the boy-kill the boy-kill them all!"

"Harry, wake up." Dumbledore ordered softly, laying his hand on the boy's shoulder. Harry jerked his head up and caught the old man's gaze. "It's okay, Harry, we're here to protect you."

Harry shivered. "I hate being inside his head, sir. I hate it so much." His eyes brightened, but he blinked away the tears before they could fall.

"I know, my boy, but it will all be over soon."

Harry nodded and hugged himself against the coldness growing in Voldemort's mind. He had to be strong and ready to fight when the evil man arrived.

--

"There's no one here." Snide Gnot, a junior Death Eater, announced with disgust.

"Of course there is, you nitwit! They're hiding, that's all." Another Death Eater admonished from the shadows of a deserted class room.

"Shhhh! Will you two shut up, what if they hear us." A third added angrily.

"Right, and you call yourself silent, do you?" Gnot muttered under his breath as he entered another darkened room, his wand at the ready.

Out of nowhere, a white figure appeared and then Gnot felt himself falling backwards, a broken vase rolling away on the floor. He dabbed a hand to his forehead and drew it away to find blood. Standing up, the man backed quickly away from the doorway, and back to where his fellow Death Eater's were still arguing.

In the blackness of the classroom, behind a cuboard, Peeves laughed silently into his hand.

--

Voldemort steadily made his way towards the Headmaster's office. He knew where they were, he could already sense Harry Potter in his mind.

"You won't escape me this time, boy." He said, knowing that Harry would hear him, or at least feel his intent. His gray hand tightened around the pheonix feather wand in his hand. The boy would know who killed him. He would beg for life before the end.

--

Lucius Malfoy gritted his teeth in anger as he finished searching Serverus' private rooms. The teacher wasn't there, and it looked like he'd left in a hurry. The Death Eater stared at the plate of cookies and overturned book that lay beside a plush black chair. Severus had probably been having a quiet, relaxing evening when the Dark Lord had called to him. Lucius smiled as he imagined the look of surprise and pain that must have flashed across the traitors face.

Lucius glanced once more around the empty room, trying to find some clue that might lead him to the traitor's location. His silver eyes stopped searching when his gaze fell upon the fireplace.

"The Headmaster's office." He announced victoriously.

--

"He's here." Harry warned at the exact moment that a blasting curse bounced loudly off the outside door. The teen jerked his head towards the door. "He's alone - for now."

"Alright, ready then?" Dumbledore asked those around him.

MInerva nodded and shook her wand out of a hidden sleeve in her cloak arm, Flich stroked Mrs. Norris as if nothing out of the ordinary was about to happen while Madam Pomfrey came to stand beside Snape, who was still feeling some ill effects from the intense pain his tattoo had caused. Dumbledore came to stand protectively in front of Harry, both of them had their wands drawn.

"Sir." Harry started uncertainly. "We know, from the graveyard, that Voldemort's wand and mine own cancel each other out. Maybe, I should be in front."

The Headmaster looked back. "Absolutely not."

Then the door burst open. When the dust settled, they all saw Voldemort standing in the doorway.

"Cowering, like frightened children." The evil man spat out angrily. "I expected more from you, Dumbledore."

No one responded to this.

"Are you prepared to DIE like frightened children?" His red eyes sought out Snape. "Traitors and cowards, how appropriate."

"None of us will die today, Voldemort, but your future is not looking so bright to my eyes." The Headmaster said finally. "You are evil, and we will destroy you ."

Voldemort laughed. "You destroy ME? I would dearly like to see you try, old man." His lips twisted in a manic grin. "Die now. Avada Kadav-."

"Avada Kadavra."

The green spell hit Voldemort instantly killing him. Every eye turned to Snape, who stood unsteadily next to the sofa, his wand held in a shaking hand. His dark eyes were fixed on Harry.

"He's dead..." Snape said slowly. "You killed him."

"NO!" Another voice interrupted in horror.

Everyone turned at the unexpected cry. Lucius Malfoy, his Death Eater mask held in one hand, stood just outside the room starring at the dead body of his lord in anguish. With a frantic gesture the man turned and ran, disapearing down the stairway. The next second they heard a distant pop of apparation.

--

VOLDEMORT DEAD

Twenty Death Eaters captured

Harry didn't go on to read the rest of the report, he set down the borrowed copy of the Prophet and went back to eating his fried eggs. The day before seemed like it had happened years ago, not mere _hours_. His hands were still shaking from the adrenaline, he hadn't been able to rest at all since the darkest of curses had left his wand. With Voldemort distracted by Snape - and his own voice - it had taken little skill to quickly send the spell, but the fact that his Avada Kadavra had worked worried Harry. Any wizard able to complete the curse required a large amount of dark energy. This he had learned in DADA, sixth year. He stopped eating, his fork clattering to the table top. He was a dark wizard, he had comitted murder. These two thoughts seemed to override all others. Without a word to anyone, Harry left the Great Hall and went to the Gryffindor common room.

--

Snape watched Harry carefully all morning. He knew what kind of tole killing had on the innocent. He still remembered every detail of his first murder, the clear memory only served to increase his concern for the silent Boy-Who-Lived. Harry had not spoken a single word since the kiling, and Severus was afraid for him.

When Harry got up unexpectedly and left without finishing even a third of his food, Snape began to follow him, unsure of what the teenager would do to himself. The man knew how it felt to discover ones-self capable of the most horrendous crime. The fact that Harry's actions had been out of self-defense and not evil intentions made the difference between what Severus had done and what Harry had been forced to do.

The boy didn't seem to notice that he was being tailed as he walked slowly up to the Gryffindor common room. Snape watched from the base of the stone stairway as Harry wearily said the password and entered through the portrait door.

--

Harry slumped on the couch, unsure of what to do next. He did not feel like reading Quidditch Through the Ages, but then neither did he feel like sitting there doing nothing. Ever since last night, when he had said the unforgivable, memories of the night his family had been killed flashed through his mind. He had not heard Lucius actually utter the Avada Kadavra that had killed them, but now he knew what it must've felt like. He was a killer now. A killer had murdered his family. He had murdered.

Shaking his head to stop the strange flow of thoughts before he could reach a more disturbing conclusion, Harry stood and began to pace across the common roomfloor. He wished, not for the first time, that Ron and Hermione could be there with him to help him through this, but he knew that with the Death Eaters at large with no leader the school still wasn't safe for more people. At present it did not appear that the school would even be opening at the beginning of the year. With the wards damaged so severely it would be months before they were back up to full strength, although anti-apparition ward had already been put back in place by Snape and Mcgonagall. Harry thought for a long second trying to remember when the Gryffindor House leader had returned. Last he had heard the woman had been home. He shrugged and turned back towards the window.

Outside it was a beautiful day. Blue skies seemed to beg for him to fly, while a cooling breeze softly blew white clouds past the distant mountain. A sudden urge to escape the confines of the castle siezed him and Harry found himself down the stone stairway outside the common room before he had even formulated a destination. Hagrid's Hut. The half-giant wasn't actually there, but the large crowded room always seemed like a second home. The strange - and often illegal - creatures housed inside were more comforting than frightening. Now that he knew they wouldn't eat him alive, that is. Harry remembered his first reaction to the baby dragon Hagrid had presented first year. That seemed like ten life-times ago. Instead of years ago.

His feet beat a path through the courtyard - he felt a tingle of residual dark energy as he passed through - and to the large stone path that wound it's way down the side of the hill. It had rained early that morning and the stones were slippery and reflecting the morning sun. In another two hours they would be dried and no evidence of the rain would remain. That is how Harry felt about his life. With Voldemort gone, he would just drift into the background of everyone's lives and eventually fade forever. At least, that is what he dreaded would happen. It wasn't that he wanted to be worshipped or anything, but at least he had been useful before. Now, he was just another paragraph for the history books.

A soft sigh brushed past his lips as he pushed the heavy wooden door of the hut open with his shoulder. Flobberworms groaned from a darkened corner; a brown fur pelt lay on the floor below a window serving to keep the rain off the floor since the window had been left cracked open for the bats. Harry turned in a circle and let his gaze wander, searching for something to keep his interest. His green eyes settled on a partially covered book leaning against the wall by the door. It was covered in mud and water stains and appeared to have been used as a doorstop on more than one occasion. The fact that Hagrid - who couldn't read or write - would have a book in his house seemed peculiar and so Harry stooped down and picked it up. He had to rub a streak of dirt off the spine with his robe sleeve so that he could discern the title, Quidditch Through the Ages: Edition 1. Harry felt his breath hitch as a suspicion bloomed, he hastily opened the front cover and stared at his mother's flowing script on the inside flap. It read, To James Potter from Lilly Evans.

Tears started to flow then and Harry let them. For once he wasn't going to feel ashamed, for once he didn't have to. No longer was he The-Boy-Who-Lived; no longer was he the only hope of the Wizarding World. Weakness didn't matter anymore. He had killed Voldemort and in the process murdered every expectation that had ever been placed heavily on his young shoulders. Sobs cut through the hut, but no one was there to hear. Harry hugged the book to his chest possessively and made his way over to a giant sized wooden chair at the head of the table. He sat in it and weeped for all the years of pain he had hidden from the world. At that moment, he decided not to hide ever again. It might be hard to change, but he was not going to be governed by other people's wants anymore. His life belonged to him now and not Voldemort or Dumbledore or the Wizard's Ministry of Magic. It belonged to Harry Potter.

--

Snape muttered a frantic lumos and spared barely a glance for the obviously empty room before moving on to the next. Harry, the confounded boy, could not be found! Dumbledore had discovered the boy's appsance when he had called him down for lunch. Now it was well past three in the afternoon. The wards were still up, so no lone Death Eater had entered the castle unknown. That meant that the boy was hiding from them, on purpose!

Snape snorted as he left another empty room. It would be just like that arrogant Potter to think that he did not have to inform a teacher if he chose to go off in a corner and mourn lost innocence. It was no mystery to Snape that last night's Avada Kadavra would be the foremost on Potter's mind. Probably accompanied by the suicidal tendencies of the weak A soft growl made it's way up his throat at this thought. The last thing he needed was a dead Potter on his hands the day after being liberated from a lifetime of servitude. This day should be one he spent celebrating! Instead, he was searching old classrooms in the dungeons while the other teacher's searched the rest of the school grounds. Minerva had volunteered to do rounds outside the castle, Snape suspected she wanted to meet a lone Death Eater attempting to access the school. After all, she hadn't been able to join in last night and the Gryffindor had a mean streak to her that occasionally outshown her maternal tendencies.

"Where is he." Snape muttered darkly to the hall floor as he made his way to the next section of doorways.

--

Minerva frowned at her dew covered hem and muttered a few choice words in Latin. Instantly, the dampness was gone. With a satisfied nodd, the Head of House stepped onto the large stones that lead down to Hagrid's Hut. She had already made a circuit of the castle grounds and this was the last remaining place to check for Harry. Her brow furrowed in worry as she thought of how long the boy had been gone. What if he had been overcome by panic, or accidentally crossed the ward bounds - Dumbledore assured her this was not the case and his monitoring spells would have alerted them instantly - where he could've easily been nabbed by a lingering Death Eater.

She reached the door and used her wand to open it soundlessly. The last thing she needed was a bunch of awake flobberworms greeting her with their grotesque noises. She shivered just thinking about the revolting creatures. Seated at the table, in a very large wooden chair, Harry Potter slept with his face resting on a dirty old book. Minerva relaxed marginally and sent her sphinx patronus to the others to let them know the boy had been found.

"Harry?" She shook his shoulders gently.

He moaned and turned his head away still asleep, this new position revealed tear tracks and puffy red eyes.

"Oh. Oh, dear." Minerva tutted and shook the shoulders more firmly. "Come on Harry, wake up, my boy."

He stirred.

"Hmmm?" He asked, looking up at her sleepily through lopsided glasses.

"You need to wake up. You have been gone for hours, we missed you at lunch and got worried when we couldn't find you."

Harry readjusted his glasses so that they rested straight on his nose. "I fell asleep."

"Yes, I can see that." She smiled a little. "Now, come on, we need to get you back to the castle."

"Okay. I found something. It belonged to James - my father." Harry brought the book up to his chest again and hugged it close.

Minerva stared at it for a long moment, there did seem something familiar about it now that the Harry mentioned it.

"Lilly's wedding present to your father. A first addition, I believe." She said finally. "He never went anywhere without it."

Harry looked down at it in awe. "I can keep it?" He asked. At her conferming nod he grinned.

"We must be getting back. It is almost four in the afternoon."

The boy gaped at her. "No way!"

With a shooing motion, she got him out the door and then they went back up to the main school building.

--

The Headmaster sipped his tea slowly and thoughtfully.

"We must find a suitable place for Harry until the wards here have been strengthened. It must be secure, but I do not think that Grimwauld place is satisfactory - too many memories there for the boy." The old man stroked his beard.

"What about Minerva? She seems to have taken to him like a second mother." Severus suggested, his voice dripping of disgust. "They're perfect for each other. Together there would be enough Gryffindor idiocy to keep any Death Eater at bay."

Dumbledore glared over his glasses. "I did not have time to tell you before, but Minerva has requested a few months of leave. Her husband has been sent to St. Mungo's. It is believed that a Death Eater subjected him to a prolonged cruciatus curse in an attempt to rid the school of another teacher before their strike last night."

Severus nodded. "That is likely. So, not Minerva's. Where then? All of the other teachers here at Hogwarts either have family or poorily defendible dwellings. I suppose you could take him?"

"No, with Voldemort dead the entire Wizarding goverment is going to be re-orginized. That will take some special handling." There was a dark hint in the old man's voice.

Snape frowned. "You really must stop manipulating everyone. It is becoming a habit."

Dumbledore shrugged, a twinkle in his eyes. "Perhaps."

Severus took another sip of his tea and worried the cuff of his black robe sleeve. "That doesn't help us at all with the question of where to send the wel- uh, Potter."

"Harry." Dumbledore stressed the word. "Is in more danger now than he was before. Instead of Riddle attempting to stop a prophecy from fullfillment, we have an entire clan of Death Eaters seeking revenge. They are not going to be rational and hardly predictable. I need to know that he is safe." There was a long pause during which Dumbledore stared hard at Snape as if deciding something. "I believe that you should take him. No one else will be able to think like they do and...frankly, you have a more secure home than I do, and that is truly saying something."

Snape froze in mid-swallow, the hot liquid burning his throat. "What?" He sputtered finally. "You want me to take the wel-Potter?"

"Harry." Dumbledore stressed in exhasperation.

"Harry." Snape conceded grinding his teeth together loudly. "What am I suppose to do with him for months? He hates me!" He stated victoriously as if that settled the matter.

"Oh, I think that hate is a little strong."

"No! He does. . .just ask him." Snape grinned smuggly. "If he willingly agrees to come and live with me then I will agree to have him. And no manipulation!" He added quickly. "It must be an independent decision."

The Headmaster smiled. "Agreed."

--

"You can put your trunk over there, the ride is a long one and you will probably want it handy." Snape said acidically, pointing to a far corner of their shared train compartment. Harry quickly went to do what he was told. Then he sat down on a seat opposite Snape.

There was a lurch beneith their feet and then the train started forward slowly at first, gaining speed with every second. Harry contented himself with looking out the window at the passing scenery. Two days ago Voldemort had attacked the castle, two days ago the world changed. Everything looked different to him now. Before whenever he looked out the window he was thinking of that blasted prophecy, or his Aunt and Uncle, or the mystery of what magic was. Now, he had fulfilled the prochecy, lost his family, and knew magic could not solve all of life's problems.

"You seem pensive. I assure you that the trains accomodations are not at all what you are used to." Snape broke the silence with a wave of his hand, he was motioning towards the benches they sat on. "All you have to do is touch them with your wand and say 'Transform' and a bed will appear."

Harry raised his eyebrows in surprise. "How come nobody told us first year?"

Snape gave him a stern look. "Over a hundred unsupervised teenage students of mixed gender...in compartments. A bed would hardly be appropriate, don't you think?"

Harry blushed. "I guess you're right - um, yeah." He stammered embaressed. Honestly that had never occured to him.

Snape ignored his discomfort and reaching for his own bag, he pulled out a copy of that days Daily Prophet and proceeded to become immersed in the gossipy columns.

It didn't take long for Harry to get bored, and then as always his thoughts turned to the Dursleys. Their dying screams, the crash of his Aunts body falling. Lucius standing in his doorway, wand raised. The killing curse on his tounge. His breathing hitched and Harry tried to squelch the urge to cry again. He felt annoyed with himself, it seemed that he couldn't go ten minutes without crying! It wasn't as if he never lost anyone before, why was this hitting him so hard. He felt confused and unsure, hugging himself the boy curled himself into a corner of the bench and closed his eyes. Maybe it was just stress and lack of sleep, if he took a quick nap it might help him regain better control of his emotions. With this comforting thought, Harry allowed himself to fall asleep, lulled by the rocking motion of the train.

--

Snape watched from the corner of his eye as Harry fell into a deep sleep. As soon as he was sure the boy would not awaken anytime soon, the Proffessor folded his newspaper and replaced it in his bag, instead pulling out a thick book Dumbledore had given him that morning - Teenage Wizards and How to Raise Them - along with a bag of chocolate chip cookies. He munched on the treats as he speed read the first few chapters of the book. Two hours later the Potion's Master set his book aside with a heavy sigh. Being a Head of House, he was responsible for the well being of over a hundred students each year. As a Proffessor, his expertice was used to teach all of the students in the field of Potions. With all of this previous experience at his disposal, the man still felt lost whenever he thought of Potter being alone with him for over two months.

Two hours with the boy rarely turned out good, and never ended positively. The fact that Potter hated him did not bother the man, but knowing as he did that the teenager probably wouldn't even attempt civility once they arrived at the Snape Estate erked him. The book had a few insightes that might come in handy - such as negotiation - but to his great distate it appeared to have been written by a Hufflepuff. Emotions and feelings were mentioned every other word and it even went so far as to advise daily "talks" with the boy. Ugh, as if he didn't have enough problems already! The Dark Mark may have faded into oblivion - he looked down then at the bare forearm and smiled briefly, rubbing the clear skin - he was still left with wondering what to do with the boy. He could hardly teach him Potions for two months straight, and Occlumancy was out of the question.

With a sigh, the man resumed his reading. An hour later, he heard a sleepy moan from across the compartment.

"Proffesor, did I miss the lunch cart?"

Snape looked over at Harry, who was stretching and rubbing sleep out of his eyes. The man frowned.

"No. It won't be lunch for another hour." He looked down at his cookies guiltily. "However, you may have a few of these if you like." He held out the bag reluctantly.

Harry stared at him in surprise for a moment before accepting a few of the chocolate chip cookies. "Thank you, sir."

Snape grunted an unintelligible response.

--

CHAPTER TWO

DESPITE THE WORST INTENTIONS

Harry munched happily on the cookie Snape had given him and looked out at the unfamiliar scenery flashing past he window. They appeared to be speeding past a tall cliff face, but every so often a break in the wall would reveal a giant waterfall a few hundred yards from the tracks. The falls were beautiful and reflected the dimming light in multi-colored rainbows.

"Do you know how long it will be until Hogwarts is opened again?" Harry asked curiously, turning his gaze away from the sight.

Snape shook his head abrupty, annoyed at the interruption, but he forced himself to answer in a flat tone. "A few months, I presume. Professor Dumbledore will need time...he has not yet mentioned a specific date to me or any of the other teachers. I would recommend you use this time wisely, Mr. Potter." A light sneer entered his tone at the name.

Harry frowned down at the remains of his cookie, suddenly no longer hungry. A few months with Severus Snape seemed like a death sentence. Although they had been getting along well during potions lessons, that was for mere hours and even then they rarely got along long enough to finish the entire lessons. Snape would probably throw him out after the first few days. With Death Eaters on the loose, Dumbledore and the other Professor's busy and no home to return to, Harry felt true fear grow up within him. His palms began to sweat and he wiped them on his pants, trying not to think about what the next few months had in store for him.

"I think I'll just sleep a bit more." He decided aloud. Without waiting for a reply - if, in fact, Snape would give any - or looking over to see the man's expression, Harry lay his head against the wall by the window and let his eyes fall closed. Once again, the train's motion lulled him into a peaceful sleep.

--

Snape watched Potter sleep for a few moments his oft-denied conscience sternly pointing out the uncomfortable position the boy had somehow found himself in - halfway slumped into the corner of the seat, his face pressed up against the wall, arms relaxed and hanging off the edge. The Potions Master re-opened the book and chose to ignore Potter. It wasn't as if he cared that the boy would wake with a crick in his neck. Worse things had happened, he thought with a snort of derision.

However, as he read on, his onxy eyes kept drifting back over to gaze at the boy. Every time he caught himself, the man would shake his head firmly and continue reading. After the third time, he growled in irritation and threw the book down on his seat a small part of him hoped that the noise would wake the boy up, but Potter remained unmoving.

"Albus, what have you done to me?" The man muttered darkly. "Months with this welp!"

He pulled out his wand and waved it at the boy. A few latin words later and Harry was resting comfortably on a full feather bed, covers wrapped securely around him and several fluffy white pillows piled under his head.


	2. Chapter 2

--

CHAPTER TWO

DESPITE THE WORST INTENTIONS

Harry munched happily on the cookie Snape had given him and looked out at the unfamiliar scenery flashing past his window. They appeared to be speeding past a tall cliff face, but every so often a break in the wall would reveal a giant waterfall a few hundred yards from the tracks. The falls were beautiful and reflected the dimming light in multi-colored rainbows.

"Do you know how long it will be until Hogwarts is opened again?" Harry asked curiously, turning his gaze away from the sight.

Snape shook his head abrupty, annoyed at the interruption, but he forced himself to answer in a flat tone. "A few months, I presume. Professor Dumbledore will need time...he has not yet mentioned a specific date to me or any of the other teachers. I would recommend you use this time wisely, Mr. Potter." A light sneer entered his tone at the name.

Harry frowned down at the remains of his cookie, suddenly no longer hungry. A few months with Severus Snape seemed like a death sentence. Although they had been getting along well during potions lessons, that was for mere hours and even then they rarely got along long enough to finish the entire lessons. Snape would probably throw him out after the first few days. With Death Eaters on the loose, Dumbledore and the other Professor's busy and no home to return to, Harry felt true fear grow up within him. His palms began to sweat and he wiped them on his pants, trying not to think about what the next few months had in store for him.

"I think I'll just sleep a bit more." He decided aloud. Without waiting for a reply - if, in fact, Snape would give any - or looking over to see the man's expression, Harry lay his head against the wall by the window and let his eyes fall closed. Once again, the train's motion lulled him into a peaceful sleep.

--

Snape watched Potter sleep for a few moments his oft-denied conscience sternly pointing out the uncomfortable position the boy had somehow found himself in - halfway slumped into the corner of the seat, his face pressed up against the wall, arms relaxed and hanging off the edge. The Potions Master re-opened the book and chose to ignore Potter. It wasn't as if he cared that the boy would wake with a crick in his neck. Worse things had happened, he thought with a snort of derision.

However, as he read on, his onxy eyes kept drifting back over to gaze at the boy. Every time he caught himself, the man would shake his head firmly and continue reading. After the third time, he growled in irritation and threw the book down on his seat a small part of him hoped that the noise would wake the boy up, but Potter remained unmoving.

"Albus, what have you done to me?" The man muttered darkly. "Months with this welp!"

He pulled out his wand and waved it at the boy. A few latin words later and Harry was resting comfortably on a full feather bed, covers wrapped securely around him and several fluffy white pillows piled under his head.

--

Several hours later the train came to it's final stop at the train station of Littleton. The loss of motion caused Harry to wake up. He yawned and turned his head to one side, trying to fight off the growing sense of wakefullness that permeated his mind. The first thing he noticed was a soft bed underneith him and a warm feather blanket on top. He sat up quickly, confusion taking the first step at wiping the sleep away. He looked around himself and tried to remember how he had come to be in the empty compartment. A vivid memory disapated the last few tendrels of mental fog.

FLASHBACK

Harry paused outside the door to Dumbledore's office. His mouth was dry and he felt his blood rush away from his face at the prospect of entering the room where he had killed Voldemort. Deep inside, he harbored a strange fascination and expectation. For some reason that he could not pinpoint, he expected the room to be altered in some way to reflect the aweful deed that had taken place within.

"Come in, my boy!" The Headmaster's welcoming shout sounded muffled through the thick door.

Harry pushed into the room and walked across the floor, each step left his feet feeling like they had been pricked by many needles. A residual aura of darkness - much like that in the courtyard - caused him to shiver and turn cold for a few moments. The second he ascended the stairs and stood before the large desk, which Dumbledore was seated behind, the cold faded away.

"I am sorry about that, Harry. I have tried to purge the remaining dark power from the room." The old man explained apologetically. "However, it seems that nothing short of time will erase it from here. I have contemplated finding a second office space in the meantime. The castle has many unused rooms, I am sure that at least on of these will service my needs adequetly."

The man smiled happily and relaxed back into his chair. Harry had never seen the Headmaster so at ease, always a sense of foreboding had clouded his eyes. The death of Voldemort had brought an end to the constant foreshadow of darkness. Harry found himself smiling back, his first genuine smile in days.

"I have something to discuss with you." The older man paused, his eyes searching Harry's. "I would like you to go and live with professor Snape until the last of the Death Eaters are captured or killed. I feel that you would be safest in his care."

Harry winced at the word 'killed'. In his minds eye he could see the surprised expression on Voldemort's face as he fell to the floor. The fleeting remembrance vanished instantly. Harry tried to think of what the Headmaster had just told him. Living with Severus Snape did not seem like a it would be very safe, and he could not picture the ill tempered man caring for him one snidget. He told the Headmaster as much and recieved a loud chuckle for his trouble.

"After what you did for Severus you may expect some change in his attitude. The hostility that you feel towards each other is something that you will have to work through, but I do believe that it is for your better good to go with him." The old man offered a lemon drop and then took one for himself. "Or you could stay here at Hogwarts. I am sure, after slaying Voldemort in such a dramatic situation, any of the teachers would be glad to offer to supervise your stay here." He added quietly. "You may not like Severus, Harry, but you can trust him to look after you."

FLASH BACK

An empty cookie bag on the bench opposite was the only evidence that Snape had ever been there. Even his carry-on bag was missing. Harry raised himself up on one elbow and wondered where Snape had got himself to. He felt a sliver of unease at the thought of the man tucking him into the transfigured bed. He shivered and tapped the bed cover with his wand tip.

"Nox." He spelled decidedly.

Instantly he felt the material under him flux and shift, until it came to rest as a slightly uncomfortable compartment bench.

"Where is Snape?" The boy questioned aloud.

He could hear other passengers beginning to unbark, their footsteps echoeing down the hall outside the door. Several passed by heading for the exit doors. For a moment Harry felt like he must have been abandoned by the potions professor. He grabbed his bag and after a brief hesitation stuffed the cookie bag in his duffle before moving to open the door. Just as he reached for it, the door handle turned and Snape's sallow face appeared in view.

"Potter, come with me." The man ordered.

Harry followed as the man whipped about and started towards the far end of the train car.

"How far away do you live, sir?" The boy asked.

"Not far." Snape replied. "Well within walking distance."

This did not give any idea to the actual distance. Harry frowned, but did not say anything further. He could not wait to get to the professor's home so that he could get settled in. In reality, he did not know how well he would like staying with the man. It didn't seem very probable that they would get along - at first, in the least - but in Dumbledore's office he had not been able to say no. There were a million reason NOT to go to Spinner's End, and only one reason TO go. Harry wanted to get away from Hogwarts. From the place where he had comitted murder. The killing curse still wieghed heavily on his mind and he could not bear to stay at the school for the rest of his year. While his Aunt and Uncle's house would have been even worse. There was no way he could have done anything else. Dumbledore had made it quite clear that his only options were Hogwarts or the professor's home. All in all, at the time, the latter option seemed best for him. Now Harry was not so sure that he had chosen wisely.

Once out of the train station, Snape led him over to a shop, it's name scrawled in unsteady green writing over the glass door. It read: Homer's House of Herbs. Harry groaned internally at the ridiculous name. Snape told him to wait outside and then entered. Five minutes later he returned, seemingly emtpty handed.

"My house is another block away, but before we go there do you need to purchase anything?"

Harry thought carefully and finally shook his head. "No, sir. I should have everything."

Snape turned on his heel and started down the sidewalk at a brisk pace forcing Harry to jog in order to keep up. The "house" looked more like cottage on steroids. It was obvious to Harry - from the taxi's to the passerbyes chatting into cellphones - that Littleton was a muggle town. How Snape was able to hide the disporpotion of his house astonished Harry, although once he had thought on it there did seem to be a lot about the magical that muggles simply did not see because they wished not to see.

"Incase you are wondering, I have an illusion charm set over my property. Not even you can see it in its entirety unless I give you magical permission. The cottage that you see now is another illusion. The Snape family home is a little less than a castle in itself. A mansion, if you will, is a closer aproximation." Snape informed him cooly.

"Are you going to show me the rest of it?" Harry asked.

Snape snorted. "With your record of mischevious, I would not dare such a thing. You will be fine in this portion of the house. I would advise you not to go looking for the rest of it, because you are more likely to end up the meal of some demented rug. I have not had a chance to do any purging of the dark magic anywhere else."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Great." He commented sarcastically.

The boy had seen dark magic to last him a lifetime. He had experienced enough of it to be sick of the very proximity. Snape entered the house first and held the door open as Harry walked inside dragging heavy his trunk behind him. Harry's gaze travelled quickly over everything he could see. They were standing at the head of a long hallway that branched off into different rooms, it seemed to go on forever. Snape went forward to lead the way.

"This is the main hallway. All of the sleeping quarters are upstairs, but every other room can be accessed from this hallway. Do not enter any of the rooms with a closed door, not under any circumstances." Snape glared at Harry until the boy nodded. "The kitchen is at the far end, and if you ever get lost just snap your fingers and one of the house elves will appear. Do you have any questions?"

The professor's tone was that of a teacher and not a guardian. His face was cold and expressionless and as Harry followed him down the hall he wondered again what he had gotten himself into.

"I don't have any questions right now, sir." Harry responded.

Just then a portrait on the wall caught his eye. It was of Salaazar Slytherin, the eyes seemed to be following Harry although the man's body never moved. The boy walked a little faster until the portrait was behind them. After passing by several more doors, some of which were closed, the man finally motioned towards a door that led up a stairway. There were glowing balls of light hovering a few feet from the ceiling and it kept the entire stairs lit very well. Harry pulled his trunk up behind him, bumping it on stairs as he went. He hoped that they would reach the rooms soon, because he wasn't sure how much longer he could lug the suitcase. It seemed to be getting heavier with every step. By the time that they reached the top, Harry was winded. He paused, taking several deep breaths.

"You will aquire a stronger physical endurance at the very least." Snape remarked as he pointed to an open doorway just within Harry's peripheral vision. The boy cocked his head further to one side, but still could not see inside. "That will be your room, Potter."

Harry glared at the acidic tone used on his last name. Then he pushed off the doorway and walked across to the room. Once inside his anger with Snape evaporated - temporarily - at the site of a huge room decorated in maroon and gold. The four poster bed, chest and dresser reminded him of his hogwarts room. They even had the Gryffindor badge engraved on them. Harry felt his heart constrict painfully. He finally had his own room and not just any room. After years and years of wishing for more than a closet under the stairs the worst man he knew had given him a palace for a room. He felt grateful and automatically wanted to please the person who did this much for him, but at the same time he didn't want to be nice to Snape. The man who had been nothing but a nuicance and a git for the past seven years.

His moral dilemma was solved quite nicely when Snape entered the room and said nonchalantly.

"Dumbledore personally moved all of this over from the tower. He also made sure that this entire room was warded and protected - over my own wards, of course. So you have no reason to be afraid in this room. Ever." Snape explained coolly.

Harry ducked his head to hide the relieved smile. "Dumbledore, huh? Nice." Was all that he said.

Snape moved to leave. "Dinner is at seven every night and breakfast is at six. You do not have to attend either, but I would appreciate it if you would not eat in any of the libraries. I have several and the books don't like to be smudged or covered in crumbs. Do you understand?" Snape fixed him with a hard stare.

Harry nodded, surprised that the man was being so easy. He had assumed that there would be an order to promptly arrive in the dinning room at the set time. He Aunt and Uncle would have never aloud him to eat in his room...they scarcley let him eat at all, he thought darkly.

"Will you be alright?" Snape asked, he seemed hesitant to leave and an awkward silence followed when Harry nodded. "Well, fine then. That's good. If you require anything, ever, just snap your fingers like I have said." Snape said finally.

"Yes, sir."

With a last look at the boy, Snape left the room.

--

Harry folded his last shirt and tucked it nicely into the middle drawer of his dresser. All of his belongings had been put away and with a glance at this watch he saw that it was close to dinner time. He was tempted to stay in his room just because he could, but that didn't seem very polite and the last thing that he wanted was to upset Snape. He would eat in the dining room for the first meal, at least. After that if he wanted to stay in his room or go outside, that would be his business. This newfound freedom made him pause at the doorway, his hand on the nob.

What if Snape wasn't the horrible, bad, mean, git he had always thought. Before this summer he would have dismissed the idea immediately, but all throughout this past month he had recieved only a few scathing remarks. While they haven't been getting along like oldtime friends, a strange truce seemed to have been reached. Although Harry knew that neither of them would admit it to the other. Still this made him wonder how Snape would react. What if everything went back to the way that it had been - the hate and angry words - as soon as he made a mistake. Swallowing, he hurried to the stairs, not wanting to find out the answer.

--

Snape had just sat down at the head of a short table when Harry entered the room, a house elf at his side. The boy looked nerveous and Snape raised an eyebrow suspiciously. He wondered what exactly the boy had to be nerveous about. He decided to quickly check on the rooms as soon as dinner had finished.

"I see that you got lost already, Potter." He observed with a nod to the house elve - Honey.

"Yes." Harry blushed. He sat down a few chairs away from the teacher.

The rest of the meal passed in silence. Harry did not know what he would do once there was no longer anything he needed to do. Dumbledore must have expected something like this to happen, because he had sent along several books of useful transfiguration spellbooks along with two wizard's games that could be played alone. A wizards chess set specifically set up for single players and a scrabble game as well. Harry couldn't wait to try out the chess board. If he practiced enough he might even be good enough to beat Ron by the time school started.

Harry finished his dinner of potatoes and salad then sat back in his chair unsure of how to leave the table. At Hogwarts it didn't matter, but at his Aunt and Uncle's house it was considered rude to leave without being excused. At the same time, he had been slapped more than once by his Uncle for asking to leave the table. The boy sat in silence, unmoving.

Snape watched him closely and frowned when it appeared that Harry was waiting for him to say something - what, the man could not fanthom.

"You...liked your dinner?" Snape asked cautiously. He didn't know what the boy wanted to hear from him.

"Yes. It was very good, thank you, sir." Harry gave the expected response.

Once again silence fell over the table. Harry sat unmoving in his seat. He had just gotten up the courage to ask if he could go up to his room when Snape snapped his fingers.

Honey popped into place at the man's side. "Yes, master?" The woman elf asked.

Snape waved a hand vaguely in Harry's direction. "See to young master Potter. Make sure that he gets to his room alright and give him anything that he needs." At Harry's surprised look, Snape added. "You were finished, weren't you?"

The man looked pointedly at the empty plate in front of the teenage wizard. Harry nodded.

"Good, then why don't you head up to bed, you had a long weekend." Just as Harry reached the doorway of the room, Snape spoke again. "Will you need dreamless sleep potion?"

Harry flashed a glance over his shoulder at the man. "No. No, I'm fine - I'll be fine." He muttered. The last thing that he wanted was for Snape to see him as some weakling. After the display in the library, Harry was hesitant to get too emotional around the man and if he went into any kind of detail about his dreamstate, it would lead to another tearfilled panic attack. He didn't want that.

"Then I will see you tomorrow, Potter." Snape said, giving Harry an excuse to hurry away and upstairs.

--

That night Snape fell on top of his black and green silk covers with a satisfied smile. He sighed and turned his head to the left so that he could see the clear skin on his forearm for the hundredth time that day.

His thoughts swirled around the plans for his future. All he had worked for, all he had been was now in jeopardy. He no longer needed to spy on the darkside of the wizard world. This left him contemplating what he wanted to do with the time given to him. He knew how lucky he was to have made it this far without being killed or worse. He had been given a new chance to make a life for himself. A different life.

These thoughts drifted through his mind as he lay there, his body slowly relaxing into sleep. In he moments before unconsciousness took over, he smiled one more time.

--

Harry struggled under the covers of his bed, a nightmare clawing at him unmercifully. He groaned and gave a low cry. A few hours after falling asleep he was waking up again. The boy opened his eyes with another groan. Sitting up he wiped the sleep from his eyes and looked round the unfamiliar room.

The bright moon was framed in his window and let him know that it was still early night. He flopped back on the bed, noticing for the first time that his sheets and clothing were soaked with sweat. He ran a hand over his forehead and brought it back damp.

"Must have been a bad one." He muttered.

For him to not remember a nightmare was not uncommon, but usually he had a small inkling which horrible memory had triggered it. This night, however, he had no idea what the dream had been about. Sighing heavily, the boy rested his head down heavily on the pillow. He wanted to get up and change out of his sweaty clothes, but couldn't muster the energy.

This routine was becoming too normal. Every night he woke up from one or more intense and terrifying nightmares. It wasn't healthy and he knew it, but he could not bring himself to ask for help. Before, at Hogwarts, he could sneak a sleeping potion from the infirmary or have Hermione brew one for him - the intelligent young woman had become quite profiicient at the potion.

Harry knew that he would not be able to get anymore sleep that night and his usual method of dealing with insomnia - the marauder man and a trip to the room of requirements - was unavailable.

Raising himself up, Harry flung his feet off the side of the bed and stood on the cold floor. He grabbed his wand and glasses off of the nightstand by the bed and accioed a pair of socks that Mrs. Weasley had made for him. He hopped on one foot, then the other as he pulled them on.

He wanted to search the house a little more, maybe find the library where he could find book to read. As he approached the door harry hesitated wondering if Snape had detection wards up around his house. He did not doubt that this was the case.

He snapped his fingers to summon Honey. She popped into place directly in front of him. Her large green eyes seemed to glow in the darkness and Harry shivered at the creepy sight. He pointed his wand forward.

"Lumos."

Instantly the room was lit from a dim glowing point. Harry knelt down so that he was at eye level with the house elf.

"Honey, would professor Snape mind if I went to the library?" He asked.

Honey scratched her head in confusion and her wide eyes glanced back and forth between Harry and the floor. "But it is late master Potter. Young boys should be sleeping I thinks."

Harry sighed. "I can't sleep. I just want to read for a little while...will that be alright?"

"Honey does thinks master Snape will not mind. Do you need Honey to show you the way."

Harry smiled. "Yes, that would be great."

He straightened and followed the elf out into the dark house.

--

The next morning dawned bright and cool with bird chirps could be heard from outside every window of the Snape house.

Severus dressed and prepared for the day with no thought of the boy he had agreed to guard. It had taken him several minutes to remember that the boy was even there. Being so used to an empty house, he was unsure of what to have the boy do. It wasn't like there were other wizards his age in the town. Even if there were, he wouldn't have allowed the boy to wander unmonitored outside the house.

Honey came into the room as Severus was preparing to go down to breakfast. The house elf bowed low and wrung her hands anxiously.

"Master Potter has fallen asleep in the library, master. Honey doesn't know if she should wake him - he has only just fallen asleep." Her eyes held a plea of instruction.

Snape frowned. The brat had obviously needed a sleeping potion last night. He donned his black cloak with a growl and stalked out of the room. Honey followed, she needed to run to keep up with his much longer stride.

"Transport him to his bed upstairs, but do not wake him. I will be taking breakfast in the lab this morning. Leave a warmed tray out for Potter." Snape said.

"Yes, master." Honey disappeared with a pop.

His personal lab was located in the basement of the building, of in the west wing. He went down the halls and flights of stairs at a determined pace. He could have simply apparated to the room, but he felt it best to take longer so that he would not reach the lab still angry at the boy. He did not make potions well when he was angry. It was a very touchy science.

Once there he set out he ingredients to make sleeping potion. He had some stocked on his shelves, but not nearly enough to accomodate two adult doses for each night. Dumbledore had warned him that the boy had nightmares. The Headmaster had also expressed a desire to see Severus deal with those problems and others that the boy experienced.

"He is a fragile young man and you alone are uniquley able to understand what he is going through." Severus mocked Dumbledore's words with a sneer. "Hah! If that old man thinks that I am going to act like some kind of - of Hufflepuff!" He muttered to the empty lab. "Then he has another thing coming."

The man set to work, he knew that once the boy woke up he would have to talk to him about last night. As unsavory as that task would be he could not have the boy suffering undully under his watch.

--

It was well past lunchtime when Harry woke up. Once again he found himself on the bed in his room. He wondered how he had gotten there and figured that Honey must have had something to do with it - he hoped.

Dressing, he checked his watch and grimaced at the late time. If Snape didn't think he was useless before what would the man think now? He frowned and quickly changed into a faded pair of jeans and an old blue t-shirt.

He left the room and went to find Snape. He had already missed breakfast and lunch, he did not want to make the man mad at him. If this had been his Aunt and Uncle's house he would've been beaten and starved for being so rude. He also wondered if there were any chore list for him to cover during his stay. After all, if he lived in the house it only made sense that he would be expected to help in some way.

He checked the dinning room first, and a warm plate of food was set out in the place he had sat the night before. It was scrambled eggs and french toast liberally dusted with powdered sugar and maple syrup. He dug in and finished the meal quickly.

Honey appeared at his elbow as he finished the last bite of toast.

"Can Honey get master Potter anything else?" She asked.

"No, thank you." Harry replied. The elf snapped her wrinkly fingers and the plates were gone.

"Honey is to tell master Potter that master Snape is waiting in the library." She said and then apparated away to another part of the house.

Harry stared at the spot where she had been standing. He knew that he had to talk to Snape, but shame made his skin blush when he thought of all the things he had done wrong in the mere hours he had been living in the house. First there had been the night of wandering through the man's house and then sleeping in until all hours of the day.

He sighed heavily and pushed up from his chair. He might as well get it over with and finished as soon as possible.

--

Snape looked up from a book he was reading when Harry walked into the library a few minutes later. He put the book down and motioned for the boy to have a seat. The library walls were bookshelves that reached up to the ceiling. Books of every subject lined the shelves. One wall was bare and there was a desk, reading chairs and a black leather couch - the last which Snape was sitting on.

Harry chose one of the chairs farthest away from the couch and waited for the potion master to start talking. He did not know what to expect from the man. Memories of the "discussions" his Uncle had forced him to endure made his pulse quicken and his palms began to sweat. He wiped them on his pants.

"You wanted to see me, sir." He said finally.

Snape nodded, a disaproving frown on his face. "Yes. Yes, I did. I would like to know why you refused the dreamless sleep potion when you obviously needed it. Honey told me that you had a nightmare last night."

"Well, I didn't think that I would." Harry lied lamely. Truly, he just did not want to seem weak in the man's eyes. "I mean, you can't predict when you're going to have a nightmare." He said in a forced light tone.

"This is not a joke, Potter!" Snape snapped angrily. "Your care has been placed in my hands and that includes your mental state."

Harry grimaced at the raised voice and tried not to shy away. "I'm sorry - it won't happen again." He stammered meekly.

Snape raised an eyebrow. "Indeed it will not." He said cryptically.

"I just didn't want to use up your personal supply." Harry's excuse only proved to anger the professor further.

"I am a _potions master_...do you KNOW what that means?" The man asked. "I do not _run out_ of things. What is further, I do not like being lied to, you will cease immediately and tell me what this is really about."

Harry hesitated.

"Now, Potter!"

"I didn't want to make a big deal out of it."

Snape looked at him increduously for a moment. "Big deal! I am the one who brought it up, it was me who offered you the potion. I would not begrudge you a good nights sleep! You should not be afraid to ask for help. I am your guardian for a reason. Do you not understand that?"

"I understand!" Harry defended himself, shrinking back into the chair. "I get it, okay. At the time, I just felt that you might...look down on me or something if I admitted that I needed it." He hung his head. "I'm sorry, alright. I mean it."

Snape sighed heavily and rubbed his forehead. "You apology is accepted, but uneccessary. In the future I only require that you be honest with me."

"Yes, sir."

--

Severus watched the boy closely throughout the entire exchange. He was deeply troubled by the fear and insecurity he could see in the boy. Something had happened to him, something unpleasant. Severus tried not to let his own memories of past abuse rise. He had to attend to the boy, there was more that they needed to discuss before he could let Potter leave.

"Do you have a punishment for me?" Potter asked, his voice wavering slightly. He looked mortified by having voiced the question, but when he looked up to meet the professor's eyes his expression was that of a resignation.

"No." Severus answered curtly. "I do have more questions, however."

Harry sighed, but nodded for the man to continue. He knew that it was necessary.

"Why did you not come to me for help last night when your nightmares kept you from returning to sleep?"

Harry's mouth fell open. "Wh-What?" He asked in disbelief.

"It would not have been to late to take a dose of sleepless dream...and, as it is, you have slept through most of the day."

Harry felt a blush travel up his neck. "I really am sorry about that, sir. I should have asked Honey to wake me up - or set my alarm - or just stayed awake." He rushed anxiously. "I won't let it happen again, I promise."

Snape laughed shortly. "I am not upset that you decided to sleep in, Potter. I am simply bothered by the fact that you did not trust me enough to ask for help when you needed it. I do not know if I can be an effective guardian these next months if you do not tell me the truth."

"To be honest it never would've accured to me to go see you about the potion." The boy said. "I guess that it would have been easier if we'd had this talk last night."

Snape's lips curled up in smile. "Indeed."

"So, that was it?" Harry asked hopefully.

"For now. Have you eaten?"

"Yeah, I did." Harry hesitated, he didn't want to ask a question that might make the man angry again now that things seemed to have finally been worked out, but he had to know. "Do I have any...chores to do today?"

Snape smoothed a wrinkle in his black cloak as he considered the question. "I had not planned any for you, if that is what you are asking, but if you are bored I am sure that there is something to do around here that you might find enjoyable."

Harry had never thought that chores could be enjoyable. He shook his head.

"No, I still have some reports that Dumbledore wanted me to write. I was just curious, that's all. I will probably be working in my room for the afternoon."

Snape stood to his feet. "I will be working down in my lab for the rest of the night so do not expect me at dinner, but if you need anything to not hesitate to ask either myself or Honey. If you get hungry or thirsty before dinner - since you did miss breakfast - the kitchen is yours as well for the time being."

--

Harry looked around the large kitchen. He had not been able to resist exercising the freedom of being able to eat whenever he wanted. He almost felt guilty when he took a glass down from the cupboard - Honey had shown him where everything was located - and filled it with orange juice from the fridge. It had surprised him that Snape had such a muggle thing in his house, but then he had found out that Snape was very different than how he used to perceive the man.

It was both surprising and disconcerting the amount of concern that the teacher had shown him since the summer had begun. Never had his family shown that much concern. It confused him and scared him because now he did not know how to react around the man. He never knew what was acceptable and what was not. Dumbledore had warned that this might be the case and now the Headmaster had been proven correct.

Harry sat at the kitchen table and drank his juice slowly. He mulled over the fact that Snape had yet to be anything but helpful. True, the man had an unpredictable temperment, but even in his anger he had showed worry over Harry's wellfare. It was puzzling to the boy.

Did Snape really care about him? Or were they facing a kind of truce because of sharing the same house? Harry was not sure if he really wanted to know the answer. It felt so nice to be cared for that he did not want to jeapordize that. Once he had finished his glass he cleaned it with a quick spell and put it away. He had reports to go write, figuring out the enigma that was Severus Snape would have to wait a few hours.


	3. Chapter 3

Heat Wave

By Ebbtide Cheque

CHAPTER THREE

DISTANCING THE WORLD

Three days after their arrival at the Snape house, Harry encountered his first real problem. It was not related to Snape or his past, instead it took the form of a jump rope. The discovery had been by accident and little did Harry know how completely it would transform his life.

--

Harry thumbed through a copy of Magical Application of Muggle Artifacts. He had been skimming through the different sections of Snape's library for several hours now and found nothing that interested him. Several books on defensive spells had been tempting, but with there no longer any reason for him to learn advanced fighting techniques, he had passed over them. His dream of being an aura was dead, he knew now that he never wanted to use another unforgivable. Like it or not, that possiblity would have to be faced if he chose to work in wizard law inforcement. He was unprepared to ever be forced into that situated again.

He continued reading the book. A built in ladder had given him access to the highest shelves, he sat on the top rung with the book propped up on his knees. It was only vaguely interesting. He found one chapter in particular that he had liked and decided to recommend to Hermione - that is, if she had not read it already on her own. He smiled at the thought of his friend. He had seen neither Hermione or Ron since Summer break. That seemed like a lifetime ago.

Since his arrival at the Snape house, Harry had received no contact from the outside world and he was starting to wonder what was happening in the rest of the Wizarding world now that Voldemort was gone. Dumbledore had seemed certain that things would be very different. Harry figured that a reorganiation of government power was just the first step.

He closed the book and replaced it on the shelf. Thoughts of the future consumed him and he sat on the ladder, starring out at the books across from him. If there was no place for him anymore in the wizarding world, what would he do? What cause would he have to continue on in a wizard education if he would have no need to use it later? For the first time since his eleventh birthday, Harry Potter did not know if he wanted to live in the world of magic for the rest of his life. He could still go to a muggle college and have a life where he was not a savior, but just a normal person. If there was anything that the teenager craved it was to be considered normal. No more dark lords to fight, no more dragons or Death Eaters, just Harry Potter.

As he sat there thinking this over, Harry heard a rustling on the shelf opposite his position. He looked for the cause of the noise and saw a thin, brown leather bound book on a high shelf on the far wall. It was shivering between two stationary books, a continuous low moan came from it as it shook in place. Harry cocked his head to one side and watched it for a few seconds. This was far from the first magical book he had come in contact with - the Monster Book of Monsters being one example of his prior experiences.

Curiosity got the better of him and the boy climbed down the ladder and moved it over to the opposite wall. He ascended to the level that the book was on. Reaching forward carefully, he drew it out. At the touch of his fingers the book stopped moving. The lack of movement was almost as disconcerting. Harry turned it slowly, being careful to keep it away from his face, and read the title aloud.

"Master Your Future: Don't Fall Victim to Doubt. That sounds like something that could come in handy - if it's not a load of crock." He said to the book.

Opening it, he read the preface at the front of the book. As his eyes skimmed over the text, a voice spoke out of the book and read aloud what he was reading. It was a man's voice.

_"Are you searching for a true sense of yourself? Is your magic alone not giving you the fulfillment that you desire? Do you feel yourself needing more? If you have identified with one or more of these situations, then this book is right for you. Master Your Future: Don't Fall Victim to Doubt is a book created for those of us who do not have a set future plan. It shows you how to use your magic and your natural talents - be they hidden and unused or cultivated and sophisticated - to better yourself. When you have finished this book, you will be a more complete person, because everyone needs a plan for their future. In order to Master Your Future, you must know yourself."_

Harry paused in his reading to think about this. Did he really know himself. His instinctive answer would have been "yes" before he killed Voldemort. Never in a million years had he believed himself truly capable of murder, but that personal assumption had been proven fatally wrong. His green eyes found the book again and he continued to read, getting caught up in the magic words and narrative voice.

_"With this book in your hand, you will be able to take control of your life. By embracing your magical as well as your human abilities. If you want to make a personal change, read this book with an open mind and a set will. This book cannot change you, it can only show you ways in which you can change yourself and in the process improve your chances at a brighter better future."_

Harry smiled at this promise. A better future was something that he wanted for himself. No matter what it took or how long he had to search for the answers; the boy decided right then and there that he would regain control of his life. There would be no more Dumbledores or Uncle Vernons, only his own conscience and his own choices.

--

Severus studied the potion brewing in the cauldron that he stood over. He frowned.

"Too many eyes again." He muttered in disgust.

This was the third potion of the day that he needed to redo. Thoughts of that Potter child refused to be ignored. Per his order, Honey had stocked the upper bathroom cabinent with Dreamless Sleep. So nightmares should no longer be a problem, but there was still the fact that the boy did not have a meaningful pasttime. Honey had reported back that Potter was in the still in the library. The boy had been going there after breakfast each day and staying until dinner. Neither of them went to the dinning hall for lunch, both being too busy at their different activities.

"Honey, I need you here." Severus called out. When the elf appeared, he said. "Bring Potter down here, I wish to speak to him."

Honey bowed low until her long nose scraped against the floor. "Honey will find master Potter."

When she left Snape turned back to his ruined potion. With an abrupt wave of his arm and several Latin words, the cauldron, ingredients and bench were all magicall swept clean. He straightened his robes and tried to remove the worst of the stains, but potions were notoriously hard to clean of materials because of the magical properties within the mixed ingredients.

With a growl of disgust he gave up and waited for he boy. He mentally cleared the rest of the day so that he could help Potter find some satisfying pasttime that did not require adult supervision. While he was surprised at the youths dedication to his studies, he felt that this was not healthy for a young man. He did not feel it wise to allow the boy to be left alone with his own thoughts so soon after the events at Hogwarts.

Nightmares were just the beginning of the fallout from such a destructive act. Severus knew from personal experience just how horrifying it could be to feel the Killing Curse flow through ones body and strike the fated object of your rage. Severus closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead as he tried to forget some of his more shameful murders. Guilt flooded through him and he wrapped his arms around himself in a self-hug. It did not feel like he would ever be whole, perhaps that was why he had grown so worried about Potter. He did not want anyone else to have to go through the self-hate and doubt that he fought each day of his life. No one - especially not a child - deserved to feel this way.

--

Harry nocked politely on the lab door and waited for an invitation before entering. Snape leaned against a long wooden bench that served as a brewing table and he motioned for Harry to choose from one of three high wooden stools set around the bench. The boy took the one closest to the door. Years of being abused and hurt had made him cautious, this servival instinct had saved him on more than one occasion when Voldemort's followers had conspired against him.

He waited, sitting on the stool, for Snape to tell him why he had been summoned. The book he had been fascinated with was tucked away in his room, safely replaced by a magical replica that Harry had put on the shelf. He did not want Snape to know about what he had found, it was too good. Everything good got taken away by guardians, that much he knew and with it being Snape this seemed almost certain. The man may be caring for him, but that did not change that fact that Harry still had reservations when it came to adult figures in his life.

"I wanted to ask you something." Snape said. "You have not mentioned a need for shoping - with summer here I thought that you might want to get some cooler clothing." He looked pointedly at the t-shirt and dark jeans that the boy wore. "If that, however, is not the case, you might still need other things. I am willing to pay for them until such a time as you have access to your bank vaults."

Harry's mouth fell open. "YOU are going to pay for my stuff?" He asked incredulously.

"Of course." Snape replied, he appeared offended by the insinuation.

"I just meant, you don't have to, you know. I could owl Dumbledore and have him send me the money."

"That will be unneccessary. If there is anything that you require I have planned the rest of the day so that we can do any shopping you need. I apologize for having put it off for this long." Snape said.

Harry did not know what to think of this offer. Never before had he been given reign to buy anything that he needed, he had alway had to make due with whatever he was given. The boy was not even sure if he really knew how to go shopping for neccessary items. He knew that there were some things that he needed - parchment paper and some new clothes among several other stuff - but he did not even know his own clothing size. He felt a wave of emberassment wash over him and a blush travelled up his neck. He ducked his head.

"I would really appreciate it, sir. I have some things that I do need to buy." He paused while he worked up the courage to ask the one thing he had been wondering all day. "Can I get a subscription to the Daily Prophet - I'd just like to know what's going on out there." He explained hurriedly.

Snape nodded. "I have a personal subscription that I can share with you. If that is not satisfactory then I can order you one of your own. It is up to you."

"Sharing is fine." Harry said, not wanting to cause any inconvenience for the man. "I also have to get some parchment, quills and another set of summer clothes."

"At least." The man said. "Well, let us not waste time. I would like to get this done as quickly as possible, so if you have anything that you would like to do before we go now would be a very good time."

Snape straightened up and folded his arms over his chest.

"No, I'm good." Harry said standing as well.

"I will be back momentarily." Without another word the man apparated away. A few seconds later he reappeared with a pop. His clothes were changed and he carried a full money pouch in one hand. "Shall we?" He led the way out the door.

--

Harry looked around himself in complete confusion. He was surrounded by young adult clothing of every style and size, but he did not even know where to start. His Aunt had never given him a choice in what clothes were bought for him and as a result he found himself completely lost inside the young men's section of the Littleton department store.

"Are you finding everything that you need?" Snape asked as he walked up behind the young man.

Harry did not want to admit that he had no idea what he was doing so he pretended to be interested in a maroon and yellow striped shirt on the rack in front of him.

"Yep."

Snape studied him for a moment. "If you need help, you have only to ask me. Remember our talk."

Harry sighed heavily and let the shirt fall back into place. "I guess I do need your help, sir." He murmered. "I'm not sure how to - I mean, I don't know how - Uh, I really have never shopped before."

He winced inwardly and waited for a sarcastic remark about being the Boy-Who-Lived and having everything done for him.

"Was there something particular that you needed? A shirt for example." The man asked evenly.

Harry felt his mouth go dry as he tried to figure out how to verbalize his needs. It had seemed very simple and straight cut when he had been at Snape's house thinking through some of the things that he would need to buy. When he had been in the lab he had thought of only a few things, but now that he was here surrounded by things that he was free to buy at his will, he noticed a lot more that he wanted. He knew that he did not need them, but having the ability to buy them for himself and not be punished for it or feel guilty for having it was almost too much. He wanted more than just the clothes and writing utensils. He wanted toys and games and art supplies. Everything that he had spent nights crying over as a child. Things he had never been able to have before. He felt so selfish that he could not voice these desires. Especially not to the Hogwarts professor.

"I cannot help you if you do not tell me what you want." Snape pressed quietly.

"Everything. I wanted everything." Harry blurted out honestly. He blushed and instantly regretted having said that.

Snape frowned down at the boy. "I highly doubt that. If you have truly never bought anything before in your life then I will help you to find what you most need. Let us start in the summer clothing."

The man placed a hand on Harry's shoulder and manuevered him around several racks of pants until they reached a section of colorful shorts and tanktops.

"You will want several changes and since I am not sure of your size and I know no tailoring spells, we will have to select several sizes and see which fits you best."

Harry picked out a couple of shirts and Snape guessed at the sizes. Then they did the same with the shorts. By the end, Harry was carring six pairs to the dressing room that Snape pointed out.

Once inside his changing room, Harry tried on the clothes. The first three shirts were too large and the last too small. Two of them seemed to fit him okay, as far as he was concerned. Sure one was a bit large, but he was used to that with all of Dudley's hand-me downs. He went through the same process with the shorts, but couldn't decide which fit him best. He was not used to the restricted feel of the smallest pair, but the others would have needed a belt to keep up. Settling on the smallest pair of shorts - they were bright orange with a tropical flower pattern - and the larger fitting shirt - it was yellow with orange palm trees - he exited the dressing room.

Snape stood outside next to a tall mirror, his sallow face schooled into a bored expression.

"The shirt is too large, but the shorts look to be a perfect fit." He commented.

Harry frowned. "Actually, I don't like these shorts very much, but the shirt is really comfortable."

They stared at each other for a few seconds. A smile creeped across Snape's face at the irony. The man had noticed his young charge's baggy clothing, but he had always thought it was one of the teenage fads of the time, but now looking at him Snape could see how truly uncomfortable it was for him.

"Very well. We will get a size bigger for the shorts. It will make your appearance scruffier than I would like, but these are for you and I have no intention of inviting company over."

Harry was not sure if the man was joking or not. He did not really care if he got to buy the clothes that were comfortable for him. It took them a while to finish shopping in the clothes section and when they were done Harry was shocked by the amount of Snape's money that he had spent so far and he knew that there were still a lot of other things that he wanted to buy.

A jump rope set had caught his eye from across the room and his gaze kept migrating that way. It brought back memories of the Dursley's house, but unlike most, these were good ones. Terra Wright, a neighbor girl, had joined a double dutch team on Harry's tenth birthday and she had liked him a lot. He had snuck over there sometimes when the Dursleys were gone to help her practice for tournaments. He could still remember the feeling of accomplishment he had felt the first time that he had succeeded in not tripping on the rope. It had been the first real good thing to happen in his entire life. He wondered how she was doing, he had only seen glimpses of her since his arrival in the magical world years before. He hoped that she was doing well, Terra had always been intelligent and sweet. She deserved a good life.

"Mister Potter." Snape snapped impatiently, draggin the boy away from his fond rememberances.

Harry followed the man over to what appeared to be a section of stationary sets.

"You said that you were needing more paper, I am afraid that this is all Littleton has to offer. We can get you some magical parchment by owl if that would be better for you, but for now you can pick one of these." Snape said poiting at the stand of paper.

Harry looked them over - there were only four - and finally picked out a stationary with words: Alter Diem spelled across the top in different fonts. It reminded him of Trelawny for some reason. He smiled as he carried it to the cashiers. On the way there he had to pass the jump rope set and he paused beside it.

"I told you that price was not an issue, and neither is choice. Short of buying the entire store you are free to pick out what you want." Snape spoke up from beside the boy. "If this toy is something that you want, then get it. You are the savior of the wizarding world that gives you an incredible amount of leeway and I will not be one to stand in the way of it."

Harry thought for a few seconds longer, struggling against getting the jump ropes. They were something that he wanted badly - if only to remember Terra - but at the same time he knew that he did not need them. In a moment of decision, he reached out and took the plastic case they were in off of the shelf.

"I'll get them." He said.

Snape led the way to the pay counter and they were soon out of the store. Outside it was a beautiful day. Birds sang from their tree top perches and the sun shone out bright and clear with only a small cloud cover to keep the temperature from getting too hot. Harry breathed in deep of the fresh air and smiled brightly. He felt freed by the purchases that weighed his arms down. They represented a mile post in his life - a major change. He, Harry Potter, had made the choices. The fact that Snape had allowed him to do this hit home with incredible power. He looked over at the stern professor, in his black robes and cloak, and felt the walls around his heart weaken. The man's place in Harry's universe had risen substantially over the past month.

"Are you hungery?" Snape asked quietly, not looking over at Harry.

Harry was floored once again by the man. Not only had he never been out to eat - not counting the odd trip to Hogsmead during the school year - it was something that he had always wanted to experience. He wanted to go to a muggle resaurant, like his cousin Dudley had on many an occasion. He just watch the people come and go while he ate. When he was little he dreamed about it.

--

Severus waited for Potter to answer, a strange nerveousness welling up inside of him. He did not know why it mattered that the boy should agree, but it did. Severus held his breath not daring to look over at the teenager.

"I would love to."

Severus exhaled in silent relief. "There is a place right around the corner here." He motioned to an dark alley way. "We'll go through there so that we can shrink your purchases without drawing attention."

Severus led the way into the alley and once they were half way through he stopped and turned to the boy taking his wand out of a pocket. He started to swing his wand in the right pattern for a shrinking spell when a sudden pop alerted them both to an intruder in the alley.

--

Harry's wand was out and in front of him before he could even think about what he was doing - all those months of training the D. A. had paid off. He saw a dark shadow out of the corner of his eye, but before he could focus on it a spell hit his side. He felt all of his bones freeze in place and an instant later he was slumped on the cold, damp ground. He could hear Snape moving above him, firing spells frantically at his attacker. A few seconds later there was a second thud as another body fell. He strained against the spell that held his body in place, but to no avail.

A strange, distorted, grotesque face appeared in front of him and he blinked. It took a few seconds for him to realize that he was staring at a mask. A white mask. A Death Eater mask. Harry screamed in fear, but no sound came out of his frozen mouth. He tried to break out of the binding spell by using his own strong magic, but all he was able to do was twitch a couple of fingers on his right hand.

"Help me!" He tried to say it out loud, but the sounds would not come.

His captor must have guessed his plea, because he leaned down so close to Harry's face that the boy could feel the warmth of his breath.

"No one is going to save you, just like no one could save Voldemort. You are mine now mudblood scum."

Harry knew that voice, he shivered uncontrollably and tried to focus his power on remaining calm. If he was going to escape from Lucius Malfoy then he would need all of his wits about him.

"You are going to die by my wand." Lucius sneered in a voice trained in intimidation.

Harry felt his heart grow cold. He was not afraid of the man, but he was terrified of the implications set down by what he said. Pain, horrible, unstopable pain had been a part of his life ever since his introduction to the wizard world. He knew how bad it could get and it scared him.

A cold hand touched his shoulder and a sudden whirling sensation let him know that Lucius had used a portkey to transport them both somewhere else. He landed hard, his face slammed against a stone floor. He felt warmth spread down the side of his face and knew it was blood.

"Feel helpless yet, Harry Potter?" The man spat out the name in crazed ferver. "I am the new dark lord for you to fear."

Harry could have rolled his eyes at this drama, even as he felt a thrill of fear. The mention of Voldemort's former title had the opposite affect on Harry than Lucius desired. Instead of causing more terror it brought a hope to the boy. He had defeated the dark lord, he had killed Voldemort. He swallowed against the nausea that churned in his stomache at the thought of the killing curse. He never wanted to feel that again. It had tainted him and no matter what he went through at the hands of Lucius Malfoy, he did not want to even think about using the Unforgivable again.

"Perhaps it would be enjoyable to release you. More enjoyable...for me that is." Lucius said.

Harry heard the man walk around him and then mutter something in Latin then his body slumped forward as simultaneously every muscle and bone was released from the spell's relentless hold. He tried to think of some way he could escape from the man, but his thought became muddled and he couldn't think straight. He recognized the start of another panic attack and he tried to calm himself mentally.

A hard tipped boot kicked him squarely in the ribs and he cried out in pain, his breathing quickening. He gasped and then drew in a deeper breath trying to stop himself from hyperventilating. He knew from his experiences with Snape that it would be very difficult to stop the attack. Panic set on his mind, drowning every thought of escape.

"Stand up, you pathetic mudblood." Lucius demanded angrily, by the tone of his voice he had been ordering this for some time, but Harry had not heard.

The boy tried to rise, but his muscles felt like noodles - flimsy and weak. He tried nonetheless. No matter how scary Lucius could be, Harry knew in his heart that he had survived worse, not that it helped him much at the moment.

"I said - stand - up." The blond haired man physically pulled Harry up and then stepped back letting the boy waver on his feet. "That is more like it, now I can look you in the eye when I kill you." He said with a crazy grin.

Harry raised a heavy arm and wiped at the blood running down his face. "You're insane." He said to the man.

"Perhaps, but I have you to thank for that Harry Potter." He ground out the name like a curse. "The great Harry Potter, 'savior' of us all." He made quotation marks with his fingers as he said this.

Harry knew then that he had to get out of there. Lucius was not just murderous, he was mentally unstable. This alone caused Harry's panic to return. He felt his breath catch in his throat and he couldn't breath. To his own surprise, the only person who he could think of in that moment was Snape. He pictured the man's pale, pinched features and black greasy hair. He found himself wishing for the professor to appear and rescue him. The mere thought of Snape seemed to calm him a little and he felt his heartbeat slow minutely.

--

Severus came to in the alley to the sound of an unfamiliar voice calling to him.

"...Mister are you okay? You don't look so good. Should I get you an ambulance? Should I call nine-one-one?" A man's voice asked in concern.

Severus cracked one eye open and winced at the splitting pain that throbbed through his head. He tried to focus on the person standing over him, but all that he could make out was a dark siluhoute. It took him a moment to realize this was because he was still in the dark alley and there was not enough light. He propped himself painfully up into a sitting position and hands reached down to help him stand.

"It looks like you were mugged." The man's voice commented.

The potions master shrugged away from the helpful hands and stood still for a few seconds while the dizziness faded away.

"There was a young man with me, did you see him?" Severus asked urgently.

"No just you. Should I call the police? You don't look so good."

The professor shook his head. "No, I'll be fine. It will not be necessary to involve the local authorities."

"If you say so, man."

Severus started unsteadily out of the alley. He had to find Harry before something aweful happened to the boy. He knew that the person who had attacked them was Lucius Malfoy, he had recognized the cultured tones and long blond hair. Unsure of his abilty to apparate without accidentally splinching himself, Severus was forced to walk the blocks to his house. Luckily he still had enough energy to obliviate the man.

Once inside his own home, his first order of business was to contact Dumbledore. Finding the Headmaster of Hogwarts would be a chore in and of itself since Severus did not know where the man could be found. He started with the office at the school of witchcraft and wizardry.

He tossed a handful of floo powder into his front fireplace and initiated a firechat. He learned from looking around the empty office and calling for the Headmaster that he was indeed not in. Severus' next best option was to send out owls. They would be able to locate the Headmaster and Remus. As much as he disliked the idea of telling that mangy werewolf that he had lost Potter, his concern for the boy outwieghed his own pride. Lucius had probably already started torturing Harry.

Severus felt a moment of suprise that he had mentally adressed the boy by his first name. He blamed it on the stress and splitting headache caused not only by the brief Cruciatus curse he had been struck down by, but also by the knowledge that he had failed the boy. He ground his teeth together in thorough irritation with his own short sight. He should have never let Harry into the alley without first making sure that it was cleared and safe. Not that it would have mattered much - a voice in his head argued - after all, Lucius had apparated in.

The Death Eater must have been following them in order to know when they were most vulnerable. Severus felt his heart contract painfully when he thought of all the horrible things he had done to innocent children in his years as a spy. Harry was somewhere with Lucius being put through worse. Severus knew that his former friend must have taken the death of Voldemort very hard and he tried not to think about how that might translate into his dealings with the boy.

He rushed to his library and scrawled a short message. He tapped it with his wand and duplicated it, then went up several flights of stairs to reach the Snape house owlery. It would have been faster to summone Honey and have the house elf do this for him, but he had to be the one to physically tie the notes onto the owl legs, it did not feel right to do it any other way. He was responsible, after all, for the entire situation.

--

Harry had not given up hope that Severus would come and find him and save him. He frowned - when had he started to think of Snape as Severus? He wondered trying to keep his mind off of the pain that shot through his body. Lucius' version of fun had been several rounds of cutting curses followed by a prolonged Cruciatus curse. The Unforgivable had left Harry's body in spasms and ultimately he had lost consciesness. When he had woken up some time later, he had been tied up and alone in the room where they had portkeyed to.

He could only see a small portion of the room and it appeared to be bare. No chairs or other furniture was in sight and the walls were also void of pictures of tapestries. Harry felt almost like he was confined inside of a cell. For all he knew, it could have been.

The boy couldn't move most of his body, the curses having taken their tole on his energy reserves. He felt so weak that any second he expected everything to go dark again.

"Where are you Severus?" He asked through cracked and bleeding lips. The empty room stared back at him, mocking him, but he refused to give up hope. Rescue would come, after all of the care that Snape had shown in the past month there was no way that Harry could believe that he wouldn't come to save him. "Hurry."

--

Dumbledore heard a familiar clicking sounds and he glanced from one side to the other in search of the origin. A large gray owl was hovering in place outside of a small window about head height. Dumbledore recognized it as one of Snape's owls. He flicked his hand in that direction and a wandless spell released the window's lock. The owl pushed it open with his beak and flew in, it droped a note in the Headmaster's hand and then flew back out and disapeared into the sky.

Dumbledore hurriedly opened the letter and saw Snap's scrawling script inside. His brown eyes skimmed quickly over the message, he gasped in horror at the words.

"No." He murmered, the letter slipping from his fingers to fall silently to the floor.

--

Harry heard a door open to his left and footsteps approached. He heard harsh laughter break the silence.

"Now, it is time for you to die. I have a promise to keep after all." Lucius said with a manic grin.

Harry twisted in his bonds as he tried to free himself. His wrists and ankles were already raw and bloody from past escape attemtps, but to no avail. They were tied tight - magically knotted, he assumed. With a huff of disgust at his own helplessness, he squirmed onto his back so that he could look up at the Death Eater. The past hours alone in the room had given him time to accept his fear and move on. Hope that Severus would rescue him still filled him.

"You should let me go, Lucius, before something bad happens to you - you never know when a little wild magic might be unleashed." The boy said nonchalantly.

Lucius' lips twisted down in a suspicous frown. "What are you talking about?" He overly articulated the question.

Harry did roll his eyes that time. "You are going to be killed, if you do not let me go right now." His brilliant green eye held a hint of promise as he said this. "Now." He repeated.

He knew from the look of anger on Lucius' face that things were about to get very worse. He tensed in preparation and waited. Snape would come to his rescue - soon he hoped.

--

Remus Lupin sat on his bed, he was staying in an inn at Diagon Alley waiting for news on Harry's location. He had been waiting for a chance to talk with Dumbledore for almost two weeks. The old man had been too busy to see him or anyone else from the order and as a result Remus had no idea where his best friends son was being kept for saftey. He had already searched the Hogwarts castle and grounds; contacted Minerva and Madam Pomfrey and tried to find Snape. The latter he was unable to do, it seemed that the potions master had disapeared from the face of the earth and no one knew where to find him.

Remus could not blame the man for having left. It would not surprise the werewolf if he did not return. Severus Snape had been a double agent for two of the most powerful secret organizations for almost twenty years the toll that must have taken on his personal life would have been enormous. Remus respected the man for his part in keeping Harry safe from Voldemort in the last several years. Even though he had never - and probably would never - say it to the man's face. He felt a compulsion to hold back from admiring the man in memory of his best friend James Potter.

The sound of pecking drew his attention to a speckled white owl outside his bedroom window. He stood and walked over to unlock the latch and let it inside.

A message fell to his feet and then the bird swooped back out and disapeared around the corner of the building. Remus leaned down with a wince of pain - the last full moon had been less than kind to him - and retreived the piece of parchment paper. An inked scrawl spread out inside and it took him a moment to decipher the words, when he did a strangled cry filled the air. He ran to the nightstand to get his wand and then apparated away. Harry's life was in danger and he had to save him.

--

Severus wrung his hands as he paced back and forth in the library of his home in front of the fireplace. Over an two hours had passed since he had sent the messages and he had still to hear back from either Dumbledore or Remus Lupin. He was beginning to worry that Harry would be dead before he had done one thing to rescue him - these kinds of thoughts had been swirling in his mind for the past hour. He was on the verge of going out to search for the boy alone, even though there was no way for him to locate Harry.

A location spell was more than useless at the amount of distance that seperated them and the only wizard with enough power to make a mental connection was Albus Dumbledore. Severus felt worry eating him away inside. There had to be something that he could do! He reached the end of the room and turned on his heel with a frustrated growl.

A ward alert at the fireplace signaled an incoming wizard. The potions master rushed over just as the Headmaster's body arrived in a bright flash of green fire. The old man's face was pale and he clutched Severus' hands in a death grip.

"Have you heard no news, Severus?" He asked, his voice rough.

Snape shook his head. "I have been waiting for your response. I have no way of tracking Harry - I tried several spells but he must be out of range. I also sent out an owl to contact Remus, I thought that he could be of use."

Dumbledore nodded. "Yes. Yes, that is good." He gave a heavy sigh and seemed to shrink before Snape's very eyes. "I knew that Lucius was in Littleton, but I did not think that he could penetrate your defences. I was going to come later today to inform you of his arrival."

"You knew he was here and you did not so much as owl me!" Anger flashed in dark eyes. "You fool."

Dumbledore hung his head and opened his mouth to say something, but before he could a harsh rapping on the front door interrupted. Snape went to answer the door and returned with a concerned Remus in tow.

"I came as soon as I got your message, Severus." The werewolve said, he sounded out of the breath. "How long has Harry been missing? Who took him? How far away is he? Why haven't you gone after him already?"

Severus held up a hand to stall any further questions. "I will tell you everything in a moment." He turned to Dumbledore. "First, I need to know if you can sense or communicate with him mentally?"

The old wizard closed his eyes he appeared to be concentrating. After a moment he opened his eyes. "I believe that I can, but it will take a few moments for me to locate him - I can feel him already. Give me a moment."

Snape and Remus waited with bated breath while the old man fell into a quiet meditation.

--

Harry spat blood out onto the floor and rolled over onto his stomache. His back felt like it was on fire. A burning spell had eaten through his shirt and several layers of the skin on his back. The teenager felt uncontrollable anger take control as he tried to break out of the bonds for the hundredth time. If he could just get his hands loose he would kill he man. All reservations he had held in place since Voldemort's death were no longer an issue for him. He could feel the power of the killing curse inside of him with no medium to escape through. He itched for a wand, any wand. He wanted to kill the man.

"Don't look so upset." Lucius said from where he stood a few feet away, his wand pointed at the boy. "This is much more fun than killing you right away...for me." The man laughed.

That was it, Harry couldn't take the flippant threats anymore. He struggled to his knees and through pure willpower he pushed his body up of the floor until he was standing with his legs still tied tight and his arms at his side.

"I am going to kill you, Lucius. The same way that I killed Voldemort, the same way that I killed Quirrel, the same way that I killed-." Harry's voice broke off as his anger grew inside of him. "You - are - dead."

/Harry, can you hear me?/

The mental voice intruded on Harry's mind and he almost fell over from surprise. His body wavered dangerously, but he was able to regain his balance.

/Who are you?/

/It is me, Albus Dumbledore. Harry, my boy, I need you to hold on for a little bit longer. I have found your location and we are coming. Just hold on a little longer./

Then the prescence in his mind was gone.

/Wait! Who is "we"?/

There was no reply, Dumbledore had gone. Harry looked over at Lucius - smiling cruely at him - and tried not to let his relief show. The anger remained, but tempered somewhat by the knowledge that this would soon be over. He saw the blond man's wand come up in a split second and before he could even prepare for the next spell, he was being knocked back on the floor. The jarring impact left him breathless, it felt all the skin on his back had been ripped off. He screamed.

"Such a soothing sound." Lucius purred. "How about we do that again."

Harry's eyes widened in pain as his body was lifted suddenly into the air a few inches and then dropped suddenly. He screamed again, his body arching up. He screamed until his lungs ran out of air. Gray tinged the edge of his vision and he tried to suck in another breath, but could not. Anger warred with panic and he felt his magic flood through him. It was not like anything he had felt before, the power of it frightened him.

"Scream for me." Lucius whispered in his ear.

Harry jerked away and blinked. Tears streamed down his face as he fought for air. In another second he would pass out.

There was a loud thump as the door burst open and hit the wall. Then three familiar voices were shouting curses and counter spells. Their words blurred together as Harry tried desperately to gain enough strength to aim his hand at Lucius. With a cry of agony mixed with anger Harry pronouced the first word that came to his mind.

"Expellio."

Lucius's eyes widened in surpsise as his wand went flying out of his hand and smashed to pieces against the far wall. Harry felt like it had taken all of his magical and physical energy to create that single spell. He watched as if from a distance as Dumbledore subdued Lucius with a binding spell.

--

Remus and Severus ran to Harry's side. The boy's head lolled limply against Severus when the potions master propped him up. The boy was unconscience. Remus checked tapped the bonds with his wand and they disapeared in a flash of light. They carefully turned Harry over.

"Oh, dear Merlin!" Remus exclaimed.

The boy's back looked like a slab of raw meat, there was no skin left to cover the muscle beneith and the edges of the back were blackened and burned. Blood soaked through Harry's knee from where a cutting curse had hit him. It was amazing he was still alive.

"He needs a healer." Severus said, his eyes shadowed with guilt as he surveyed the wounds.

"Indeed." Dumbledore spoke up. "You two must get him to St. Mungo's. Go, I will take care of Lucius Malfoy."

Severus picked up Harry in his arms and with a murderous glare at Lucius' still form he and Remus apparated to directly outside St. Mungo's.

--

Harry opened his eyes and then blinked against the bright light that assaulted his senses. He groaned and rolled over on his side - or tried to. His back felt numb and he could not move very far. Nothing hurt, but his muscles would not respond. He fell back against a soft feather pillow and tried to remember how he had gotten there. With a jolt he remembered Lucius and the death threats.

"Harry, my boy, are you alright?"

Harry turned his head as far to the side as he could and smiled when he saw the Headmaster walking into the room through an open door. The old man waved his wand and muttered something under his breath. A tray of soup with a cup of juice appeared and hovered a few inches in the air above the bed.

"Where is Lucius?" Harry asked.

Dumbledore hung his head and hesitated before answering. "Harry, it has been four months since Lucius Malfoy kidnapped and subsequently tortured you. He was Kissed over three months ago, after a trial."

Harry was speechless.

"I am glad to report that the last of the Death Eaters have been captured, tried and Kissed. You no longer have any enemies in the world of magic." The Headmaster tried to smile, but a sadness clouded his eyes. "I am so sorry, Harry. This entire situation is my fault and I feel that I have failed you." Wetness slid down his cheeks. He reached forward to take Harry's hand in his own shaking one. "Your magical core was overtaxed when you succeeded in throwing the wandless spell...your body had already been so mistreated - I am afraid that it caused you to fall into a very deep coma."

It took a few moments for all of this information to sink in.

"Snape...Remus?" The boy asked. He could remember hearing them seconds before falling unconscience.

The Headmaster stroked his beard nerveously. "Severus returned home some time ago when it became obvious that his help was no longer required - all of the healing potions that he tried had little to no affect on your healing progress. Lupin." He sucked in a steadying breath. "Remus is dead."

The teenager felt like his entire world came to a stop at those three words. He stared straight ahead as the Headmaster explained how it had happened. A stray killing curse during the last Death Eater raid. He had died a hero, that was what Dumbledore said, but none of that mattered to Harry. What mattered was that his only connection with his father - the last family that he had - was dead. Dead and gone for weeks. Harry let his eyes fall closed and felt a single tear track down the side of his face. He made no move to wipe it away.

--

Severus Snape stared out of a library window, his thoughts on the Potter boy. It had been four months since that day in the alley when Lucius had taken Harry away and tortured him to within an inch of his life. Snape still had nightmares about the horrible wounds he had received. He shook his head.

"Oh, Harry, I am so sorry." He said aloud, his heart breaking a little more with each breath. "I am so sorry."

No matter how many times he thought it, no matter how many times he murmered it in his dreams, it made no difference. The boy was still in a coma at St. Mungo's unable to see or hear or feel anything. Guilt burdened Severus down and made him feel much older than his 32 years. He turned his gaze up and looked outside where all the sun shone bright and a bird sang gayly.

Severus covered his face with his hands and sobbed for the terrible loss of Harry's childhood. Voldemort's prejudice had given the boy no chance at innocence. Tears of guilt and pain and empathy fell from his eyes and soaked into the blackness of his robe.

--

Harry turned onto his side away from the door. Dumbledore had summoned the healers some time ago and they had removed whatever numbing agent that had been used to numb his muscles. Dumbledore had left to inform the other order members - and the general wizard world - that Harry was going to recover.

Harry stared out in front of him and wished that Remus could have been there. A tear slid down his face and soaked into the white pillow resting under his head. Remus was dead. He felt guilty for having survived when his father's best friend - his own hero - had not. Another tear followed the first and then he lost control of his emotions. He sobbed quietly, his shoulders shaking as he re-lived every memory that he had of the werewolf.

"I'm sorry, Remus." His choked voice came out as barely a whisper.

He could only imagine the pain Remus must have felt at the hands of a Death Eater. The fact that he had been willing to use a killing curse such a short while ago - in his reconning of time - made him almost physically ill. He just wanted to get away from the reality of what had happened. First his parents and Sirius, then his Aunt and Uncle and now Remus. He cried harder, his breathing ragged. It did not feel like anything would ever stop the emotional pain that he was feeling.

--

"How did he react to the news of Remus?" Severus asked anxiously.

Dumbledore set his tea cup down on the table and shook his head. "Not well. He has not said a word in over a week. I am concerned for him and I would like you to go and talk to him, Severus."

Snape did not understand what he could do to help the situation and said as much. Dumbledore smiled softly.

"I was linked to Harry's mind before the rescue. I saw just how much you mean to him, Severus. In his mind, it was you that he was waiting for to rescue him."

Snape raised an eyebrow. "What?" He asked incredulously. "Me?"

The Headmaster nodded gravely. "Yes. Your attitude towards him during the beginning of the summer convinced him that you were not all bad - that, in fact, you were a very noble man."

Severus turned his head away. "I was hardly 'noble'. Tolerant perhaps."

"Either way, he was impressed with your treatment of him and he trusts you."

"I was also imressed with his lack of..." He searched for the right word.

"Spoiled ego?" The Headmaster suggested with a slight chuckle.

"Yes." Snape acknowledged. "I had always pictured him as the son of James Potter. Every time that I looked at him I would see his father in those eyes. Each time he spoke I was hearing Jame's taunts." The potions master ducked his head, blushing. "I even saw James in the boy's mannerisms."

"Yes, there is a lot of his parents in him, but do not forget that he was raised very differently than them. He did not have a rich pureblood family or caring muggle parents. Harry had Voldemort and an abusive Uncle. I must admit that I sometimes wonder if I made the right choice letting him grow up under his Aunt's protection." He said the last word with a frown.

Snape thought about this for a second. When he looked up there was a determined light in his dark eyes.

"I would like to invite Harry to come and live with me."

--

.THE END.


	4. Chapter 4

Heat Wave

By Ebbtide Cheque

CHAPTER FOUR

TO STAY OR NOT TO STAY

--

"I would like to invite Harry to come and live with me."

The instant he had spoken those words, Severus wished that he could take them back and just say 'never mind'. He couldn't keep the boy safe for a couple of days - he hadn't been able to protect Harry from Lucius's torture - how could he ever expect the boy to trust him enough for him to agree to stay at the Snape house permanently. Four months had passed by and classes were already in progress. How could he be a fulltime teacher and still give Harry the care that he needed.

"Well, I think it is a splendid idea." Dumbledore announced relaxing back in his chair and folding his hands together over his stomach. "I can have the papers of guardianship drawn up in less than an hour. The healers have already agreed to let Harry leave tomorrow."

Snape opened his mouth to object, then he closed again and thought for a second. He would never say something unless on some level he meant it. Maybe the boy could grow to forgive him in some way for the lost months. Severus felt ultimately at fault for the injuries that Harry suffered while under his care. He should have been more careful, he should have been more watchful. For four months he had thought about nothing but his carelessness and the consequences of his actions. Now he felt that maybe - if Harry could forgive him - he just might be able to forgive himself.

"I will need to talk to him before we make any plans." Snape said rising from his seat and setting down his tea cup.

"Yes, of course, Severus." The Headmaster nodded. "You can go and see him this afternoon, the healers should be done with their last treatment a little after two o'clock."

Snape folded his arms around himself and tried to qual the nerveousness blossoming inside of him. He felt so excited and terrified by the opportunity that he had opened up so unwittingly for both Harry and himself.

The ex-Death Eater knew just how hard second chances could be. He had felt more angst and pain in the past years as a spy for the order than he ever had while under the evil influences of the dark lord. Doing something good for other people could take a hard tole on the man's soul, but in this case he felt more than a little nerveous that Harry would not choose to let him take this second chance. It would be hard for them both, but he knew it was what he wanted. He wanted to be the guardian to Harry Potter.

--

Harry sat up slowly in bed, he was alone again the healers having left sometime ago. His back still ached, but it was a dull echoing ache that seemed to stay just below the surface of his tolerance. He could feel the pain's prescence, but he could choose to replace it with more immediate thoughts if he chose to. The cutting spells that Lucius Malfoy had used left ragged scars running up and down his bare legs - the healers insisted that he stay in hospital garb until his release - though they were completely healed. He had lost none of the snitch fast reflexes or balance that had meant so much in his years as Quidditch seeker for the Hogwarts Gryffindor team.

A dull and continuous clank of rain on glass reminded him of the gray damp weather outside of the building. He had not been allowed out in the three days since his return to the conscious world, the healers felt it best if he waited until after he had made a "full recovery", whatever that meant.

Harry slid his legs out from under the thick blankets and slowly, ever so slowly, worked his way onto his feet. He was finally standing for the first time in a little over four months. He waited a few moments for his balance to take over and then he just stood there reveling in the hieght and freedom this simple move gave him. He grinned.

"Should you not be in bed, mister Potter."

Harry was so surprised by Snape's abrupt entrance that he turned quickly to face the door and ended up falling instead. He cried out when his back hit the hard floor - flashbacks of Lucius tormenting him filled his mind. He shied away from the hands that reached down to help him up. Cowering, he crawled painfully backward until he was against the bed, there he sprawled panting heavily.

Snape kneeled down in front of him, eyes wide with distress at the panic he had caused. The last thing that he had wanted was to hurt Harry further.

"Potter - Harry, it is just me. . .Severus." He spoke softly, his eyes never leaving the boy's striking green ones. "Everything is okay now. I will not hurt you, I promise."

Harry's ragged breathing evened out and he relaxed a little. "Professor Snape?" He asked hesitantly.

"Yes, it is me." Snape nodded, moving slowly closer to the boy so as not to startle him again. "I am going to help you up now, alright?"

The man waited for an affirming nod before gently sliding his hands under the boy's arms and easily manuevering him up onto the edge of the bed. Unsure of what to do next, the man patted Harry's back twice - in what he hoped was a concilliatory manner - and then backed off a few feet. He looked around for a chair and when he did not find one, he transfigured one out of an empty box being used to prop the door open. He sat facing the boy, eye to eye.

"I am sorry that I scared you, Harry. I came by to see how you were doing - not send you into a siezure."

Harry smiled a little at the bad attempt at humor, his face still pale from the fright. "It's okay, sir. I was just remembering..." His explanation trailed off.

Snape nodded swiftly. "I understand, you do not have to talk about it if it makes you uncomfortable."

There was a long and drawn out silence as they stared at each other, each having things that they wanted to say to the other - yet neither being able to take the first plunge into conversation. The verbal stand off stopped suddenly when Harry took a deep breath and announced.

"I hate...I hate..."

Snape steeled himself in anticipation of the rejection he assumed was coming.

"Lucius!" Harry finished with a cry of self-loathing.

Shocked and relieved by this unnexpected revelation, Snape leaned forward and took one of Harry's hands in his own.

"He was an evil man, Harry."

Harry tore his hand away angrily. "No! You don't understand - I was going to kill him." He sobbed, tears falling down his cheek. "I could feel the killing curse inside of me. I was going to release it and I was going to kill him. Don't you understand!"

Snape studied the trembling boy before him and a wave of the deepest empathy washed over him. He had never been burdened by the valor and bravery of spirit that seemed to plague the members of Godric Gryffindor's house, but he knew what it meant to end a life. To feel an untamable anger that could only be expressed through murder. He knew what it was to feel regret so deep that it felt like it might kill you. He knew because he had lived through it.

It had been over four months since the day he had found Harry dying on the ground, blood pooling around him; in that time Snape had been able to move on and leave the memories of Lucius behind him, but to Harry's mind only several days had passed. It was still a new and terrifying experience for him that needed to be addressed. Harry's shoulders were shaking as he tried to deal with the intense emotions running through him.

"You have nothing to feel guilty for, Harry." Snape said earnestly. "If you had sent the killing curse and if you had killed him then you might have just cause, but as it is...you have no need to feel guilt over the death of the man who tried to kill you."

"I would have done it, sir. Lucius would have been dead by my hand, just like Voldemort." He sniffed and wiped at his eyes. "I am a murderer. My-My parents were kil-killed by a mur-murderer." His sobs increased in intensity.

Snape moved to the boy's side and tried to think of something helpful to say. How could you respond to something like that? He wondered. Reaching out the man placed his hand on the boy's arm.

"I know what it feels like. I know how to help you in a way that few people do...What I am trying to say." He cleared his throat and then continued in a nerveous rush. "I want you to come and live with me."

--

Harry stretched painfully as Severus unpacked the last of his trunks. The room looked exactly like it had on his first night at the Snape house. He felt like he was coming home. A satisfied smile curled up the edges of his lips.

"Home sweet home." He murmered the muggle saying.

Snape almost dropped his wand at the unexpected phrase. He would never admit to anyone how happy and satisfied hearing that made him feel. The man looked over at Harry.

"Not quite yet, the adoption papers still have not passed." Severus reminded him.

"But they will, and soon." Harry replied confidentally.

The boy eased himself carefully down onto the bed and thought about what a major step adoption was in his life. Never had he come close to anything so perfect. His Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon had never so much as mentioned the word adoption to him. It made the boy sad to think that his only blood relatives had wanted nothing more than to discard him.

"Harry? Are you alright, you have gone very quite." Snape spoke up from the closet where he was storing the suitcases.

"Just thinking about my family, that's all." He shrugged.

Snape closed the closet door and unwrinkled his robe with a few well placed pats.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked.

--

"I knew deep down that there was no way they would ever accept me as normal - as a part of their perfect family, but I had hoped. I guess that hope never really died." Harry finished some time later with a long sigh.

Snape had listened as the boy poured out all of the resentment stored up after a life-time with his ungrateful Aunt and Uncle. If they had still been alive...Severus could think of a few choice curses he would have loved to use on the couple. It was not enough that the boy had been used, abused and abandoned - he had also dealt with the pressure of being the only hope for defeating Voldemort. It amazed the potions master how normal Harry had turned out through all that had been forced on to his young shoulders.

Harry sat in silence then, his thoughts caught up in the past. Snape knew his own childhood was less than sunshine and roses - perhaps he could use his own experiences to help the boy. He smiled saddly. Never in his life had he thought that all of those horrible teenage years would be able to help anyone, but here he was able to understand in a way that few ever could. He just felt grateful that he could help the boy, even in such a small way.

"They may have never loved you as a son, but it was ignorance and greed that motivating them, not your shortcomings."

Harry smiled softly when Severus said exactly what he had yearned to hear for years.

"Thank you, sir."

"Don't thank me." Snape ordered with a frown. "It is the truth and you deserve to _know_ the truth."

"Yes, sir."

"Since you will be staying here from now on, Harry, I think that we should desist with this "sir" business. It is fine for classes, but in your own home..." Snape shrugged. "You can call me Severus, if you want."

Harry's smiled widened in genuine pleasure. His Uncle would have never allowed him to use his first name. Using Snape's first name made him seem closer.

"Okay...Severus." He reveled in the name. It seemed to roll off his tongue perfectly - for an instant he mentally substituted "dad" instead. He felt warmth fill him inside. He had a guardian - one who would actually do just that. Guard him from the harshness of life and reality. He just hoped that - unlike most good things in his life - this would never end.

"Let's go eat dinner." Severus said moving towards the door.

"You go, I'll be down in a few minutes." Harry nodded for the man to go ahead.

"Take it easy on the stairs. You are still healing." The man warned.

"I will."

--

Once he was left alone in the room Harry acciod a new pair of jeans and a warmer shirt - the weather was much colder now that winter had begun - and he wanted to look good for his dad. He smiled as he thought that. He had a dad. Not that Snape would ever referr to himself as such.

He changd quickly and on his way out of the door he caught sight of the magic talking book he had secreted in his room all those months ago - it was still hard for him believe that so much time had passed by. He shook his head and continued out the doorway and slowly made his way down the stairs to where Snape was waiting in the dinning room.

He had a dad. This happy thought kept dustracting him throughout the meal. More than once, Snape had to rapp the table with his knuckles to get the boy's attention.

"I think you're tired, Harry." The potions master announced after the third time this happened. "Let's get you up to bed. You have been through a lot these past few days."

Harry nodded to himself. Tell me about it, he muttered to himself mentally. First he had learned about the death of Remus Lupin - a fact he had yet to truly digest - and then he learned that over four months of his life were gone in the blink of an eye. To him the amount of time that had passed seemed surreal. He was still traumatized by the whole incident with Lucius. The night before he had been terrified that the Death Eater would come for him and finish the job.

--

Snape watched Harry get settled into bed, take off his glasses and set them aside, then pull the blankets up close to his chest. Then the man reached into a pocket of his long black robe and retrieved a vial of blue liquid.

"Dreamless sleep." He identified it for the short-sighted boy who squinted at it nonetheless.

The boy took the potion and swallowed it in one gulp, he grimaced at the taste. "Is there some cosmic rule that makes it impossible to get a decent tasting potion?" He demanded.

Snape smiled and even chuckleda bit. "Your sampling of potions has been limited to healing potions, which can be quite unpleasant to the senses. They are usually administered very rarely and so the witches and wizards responsible for their creation were not too concerned about getting it to taste good." The man continued. "There are many delicious potions - most of which are used by wizards and witches on a daily bases. To name just a few: wieght control potions, tooth whitening potions, immune booster potions, wart removal - the latter just recently returning to popularity."

"Just recently?" Harry asked curiously, his eyes getting heavier as the potion took affect.

"Yes, there was a time when it was 'in style' for witches and wizards alike to be as unsavory in appearance as humanly possible. It was a great source of intertainment for them to walk amongst muggle villages. This resulted, unfortunately, with the current views muggle society has on the occult and magical world. To them we are nothing more than ugly, mutated freaks."

Harry felt his breath catch in his throat. He winced at the hurtful memories of his childhood brought on by that hated word. Freak. He had been called that so many times that now it meant nothing more than a personal insult. He turned his head away tiredly. Exhaustion catching up with him he let his eyes slide shut for the last time that night.

Snape waited until the boy's breathing evened out before he put out the lights with a flick of his wand and walked out. A monitoring spell had been put in place by Dumbledore earlier so he would be alerted if anything magical attacked Harry. The ward system was linked directly to his own private rooms. With one last look over his shoulder, the man drew his black cloak around him against the growing cool of evening and went to his own room.

--

The next morning Harry woke and showered before dressing for the day. It surprised him to find the same summer clothes that he had bought that day four months ago hanging innocently in his closet. A selection of winter clothes that he had never seen before were also present. He chose a green wool sweater with a light t-shirt under it and black jeans. He checked out his appearance in the mirror on the wall and frowned at the wieght he had gained while in a coma. It had not been too much, considering his slight frame before, but it was enough for him to notice.

He tugged at the bottom of his shirt one last time and then walked over to the door prepared to go down to breakfast, that was when he heard a rustling coming from the bookshelf on the wall of his room. He looked over and saw the talking book.

His hand slid off the door handle.

--

Snape sat at the table with a copy of the Daily Prophet in front of him. He felt happy for the first time since Harry's kidnapping. He had finally gotten a good nights sleep and now he was actually enjoying the food that Honey had set out for him. A plate of scrambled eggs, french toast and bacon strips accompanied by a cup of pulpless orange juice. He swallowed another bite of eggs and smiled contentedly.

Harry had yet to come down, but Snape figured that the boy was just sleeping in. He was not expecting the boy down before lunch. With the large dose of sleeping potion and still recovering back wounds, he figured that the boy would be sleeping another hour. Taking up his cup, Severus took a sip then turned to the next page in the paper.

--

Harry opened up the book to the first chapter and let his green eyes skim over the text. The same male voice read aloud what his eyes were reading.

_"Dealing With Self-Doubt: Chapter One_

_Many young wizards of breeding are brought up to feel intitled to a good life. They do not have to work a single day of their lives and as a result, they do not know what they are truly capable of doing. _

_In these days we are seeing less and less of this kind of upbringing in our wizarding and squib children. Instead, we have muggle raised youngsters who have had to deal with stigmas and archaic prejudices._ _This newer generation must fight for the right to learn about their magical heritage and as a result they discover much more about themselves. Self-Doubt starts with an insecurity of ones view on their own accomplishments and values. A feeling of uncertainty bleeds into all aspects of their lives as this doubt grows in them. _

_While this alone is a problem, it also causes injury to loved ones and family members. A friendship can be ruined when a wizard lets doubt control his actions. Entire lives have been contaminated because of the disease of self-doubt that broadens to include all aspects of the sufferer's lifestyle._

_Many of those that they care about the most suffer the hardest for this lack of self-knowledge. Leaving doubt behind is not a simple matter, but it can be achieved if you work hard and strengthen your will." _

Harry stopped reading. He felt his earlier happiness fade when he thought about these words. What if he hurt Snape because he could not stop himself from doing something stupid. There were few things that he was truly proud of and they were all tainted with self-doubt. His time with the Dursleys had left him unsure of even the simplest decisions. He always doubted his own motives - although Gryffindor courage helped him to act even when he doubted the results. The consquence of this had haunted him for a long time. Sirius' death being a single example.

Reading the book brought to light the possibility that he might eventually hurt Snape. That was the very last thing that he ever wanted to do. The man was his life line, his ...dad. He felt a cloud of depression fall over him and with a heavy heart he replaced the book on the shelf and walked to the door. This time he went down to the dinning hall without a smile. He felt heavy for some reason.

Severus was already gone by the time that he sat down at the table. He had barely taken his seat on the chair when a steaming plate of food appeared in front of him on the table. It was scrambled eggs, french toast and bacon strips. He stared down at the food unsure whether he wanted to eat or not. Reading that book had taken away his apetite.

He snapped his fingers and Honey appeared beside him, she bowed low to the floor. Her wide eyes found his and she smiled taking his hand in her own.

"Honey is glad that master Potter be back here. Master Snape has missed master Potter - Honey too has missed you." She said throwing her arms around his leg.

Harry looked down at the house elf, a feeling of warmth returning to him in those earnest eyes. She would not lie to him and that meant that Severus had missed him for months and months and had not forgotten about him. He felt a glow of happiness fill him and he smiled down at the elf.

"I missed you as well." He said it because he felt like he should encourage her, but in truth for him not enough time had passed for him to miss the faithful elf.

"Whatever master Potter needs, Honey will do it." She said in her highpitched voice.

Harry looked back at his food, his hunger returning full-force. "Never mind."

She let go of his leg and backed away. "Honey always here if you need anything, master Potter." With another bow she popped out of sight and into another part of the vast house.

--

Snape circled his lab, taking down certain bottles of ingredients from the shelves as he needed them. His wand swirled over a steadily filling chest that he was packing all of the ingredients into. While Dumbledore had promised to take care of his potion classes for the day, he had to be getting back. He wondered how Harry would take the news.

While Harry had been in a coma the school had started another year and now it was mid-way through the year and for seventh years even a few weeks of missed classes could throw off the test result for he N.E.W.T.S. He had to talk to the boy and the other teachers so that they could come up with a class schedule that would help him to catch up without overexerting him physically.

A healer was on standby incase Harry's back wound got worse. Severus knew that he would have to insist on not only dreamless sleep, but a skin re-growth potion every night. If he did not there would be a chance that the boy's entire back would become covered in angry red scar material. Snape did not want that to happen. With a sigh he stood on tip toes to get down another bottle from a high shelf. He wanted Harry to be safe and well taken care of while living with him.

"Severus." A hesitant voice called from the doorway.

He turned and saw Harry standing just inside the door. The teenager smiled shyly and he gave a smile in return. Harry walked into the room and looked into the chest curiously. His fingers trailed around the open edge.

"Did you need something?" Snape asked.

Harry shook his head. "No, I - I just wanted to know if you could let me try one of those 'good' potions." He made up, wanting to stay close to his new dad but not feeling confident enough to just say it.

Snape smiled and grabbed a clear bottle off of a shelf, it held a pink liquid. "Here, try this one."

"What does it do?" Harry asked when he took it. Taking out the bottle stopper, he took a deep breath. It smelled of fruit. He grinned at the thought of a good potion and drank it in one gulp.

"It is a temporary sight restoring potion." He answered with a smile. "You might want to take off your glasses." He suggested.

Harry took them off and folded them up. A few seconds passed without there being any change in his sight. He was just wondering if it was a defective batch when suddenly the room shifted and churned around him before settling back into focus.

He looked around himself in awe - this was way better than his out of date perscription glasses that his Aunt had gotten him years ago. Everything was so clear and colorful. He could identify patterns in the grain of the wood used for the chest. He could actually see the weave of Snape's black cloak, before it had always just been a blanket of black, but now it looked classy instead of just ominious. He felt like he had never truly seen anything before. The colors were so brilliant it stole his breath away.

He was so overtaken with the sight of everything that he almost fell over trying to look at the ceiling. Snape reached out gently and moved him to a chair and sat him down. Harry winced at the movement that caused his back to twinge, but he was too caught up in searching every nook and crany of the lab for the pain to bother him much. Snape noticed, however, and reached into his pocket for a pain relief potiont that he had learned to always keep there. Reaching out, he hande it to the teenager.

"Drink this." He said.

Harry was so caught up in looking that he did not even think twice before downing it. He knew that Snape would never give him anything that could hurt him. He trusted the man with his health completely.

Snape watched Harry's exploration of the room with unconcealed amusement. He mentaly added another batch of temorary sight restoring potion to his list of things to make that week. If it made Harry this happy, he did not want to make the boy go without for even a single day. Snape loved the contented smile that Harry could not seem to keep off his face. It brought a warmth to the man's heart that he had not felt in years.

"I have to continue packing, Harry. If you want, I could use your help collecting ingredients." Snape offered.

Harry stood to his feet, glad to do anthing he could for his new dad. "Show me what you need."

They spent the next few mintues retrieving and packing different bottles and containers into the steadily filling chest. With the two of them working together it did not take long before the chore was finished. Then Snape shrunk the chest to a third of it's normal size and placed it on the desk. Figuring that this was as good a time as any to bring up the subject of Hogwarts and classes, Snape turned to Harry.

"There is something that I would like to discuss with you. We can move this conversation up to the library if it would be more comfortable for you." He added as an after thought, he knew that the boy's back was still very tender and needed to be taken care of accordingly.

Harry nodded and they went up to the library where Snape took possession of his favorite black chair and Harry claimed a corner of the sofa where he curled up with one leg under him and the other swinging back and forth off the edge of the couch. It was such a contradiction to their first "little talk" several months ealier when neither felt completely comfortable in the other's prescence.

"I need to talk to you about seventh year." Snape began. "While it is understandable if you decide not to go through with this last unit of your education at the moment, I would like to hear your thoughts on it."

Harry picked at the knee of his jeans as he formulated a response. He knew that he wanted to finish his magical education - even if he went on to get a muggle one as well, something that he still considered a possibility for his future. For the sake of his parent's, Sirius, Cedric and Lupin, he needed to finish his seventh year. If only for their memories.

"I want to go back as soon as possible." Harry answered. "For my parents."

Snape studied him carefully, his dark eyes boring into Harry's green one's. "I know their memories mean a lot to you, Harry. As they should." He added. "I am going back to Hogwarts tonight and if it is what you want, I have set up quarters there next to mine."

Harry's mouth fell open. "I'm not staying in the tower?" He asked in disbelief.

Unsure of the boy's feelings Snape hurried on. "I am sure that you will be welcomed to re-join your friends in the tower, however I had hoped." He took a steadying breath, it had been so long since he had cared about what someone else. "I had hoped you might want to stay with me once the adoption became final."

The potions master held his breath as he waited for Harry's response. He had no idea what was going on in the boy's mind - would he accept the invitation or not? Snape tried not to let his imagination run wild as he pictured a myriad of responses in his mind. Harry seemed to be taking his time thinking it over, there were obviously some things that he needed to work through.

"What about my friends?" The boy asked finally.

Snape frowned, not understanding what he was asking. "They will be welcomed to visit you during free hours."

"No...I mean, what if my friends don't understand why I'm living with you - what if they don't want to hang out with me because I'm living with a teacher."

"Then they would not be very good friends, I would think."

Harry sighed and rubbed his neck being careful not to aggrivate his back. "I haven't seen them in months." He realized aloud. "Hermione and Ron don't even know about my Aunt and Uncle - they probably thought I didn't want anything to do with them and then I disapeared into St. Mungo's for months and months and -." Harry sucked in a ragged breath, he was beginning to panic as he pictured their angry faces. "They're going to absolutely hate me!" He exclaimed in horror.

Snape was out of his seat and kneeling in front of the boy before Harry could blink. The man laid a hand on his arm.

"Everything is going to be okay, just breath, okay, Harry." He instructed gently.

Harry nodded and tried to do just that, but for some reason his chest felt tight and it was hard to get enough air into his lungs. He tried, but the image of his friends walking away from him lingered in his mind making it hard to think of anything else. He gasped for air and latched onto Snape's hand frantically. He could not breath.

He felt strong, firm hands rub soothing circles on his back and Snape's voice whisper promises in his ear. Promises of unbroken friendship. He latched onto these words and let them wash over him. Slowly, ever so slowly, he was able to relax and his breathing returned to normal.

The episode left him drained and tired. He let out a heavy sigh and leaned forward into an embrace as Snape joined him on the couch. The boy leaned against the body of his dad and held on as tightly as his tired muscles let him.

"I don't know why I keep doing that." Harry said softly. "Ever since summer break I have been having these attacks. I've been through so much and never had anything like this. Not even when Voldemort was inside of my mind, taunting me with visions of the prophecy."

Snape squeezed his shoulder lightly. "The human reaction is a hard thing to understand or predict."

"Tell me about it." Harry said.

They sat like that for a few seconds before Harry pulled back. "Remus will - would have." He tripped over the tense. "Wanted me to finish school."

"Alright then. I will be leaving in two hours, I would like to be there in time to inspect my house."

Harry smiled up at his dad. "They must be a handful." He joked. "All those Slytherin in one tower."

Snape returned the smile with one of his own. "Funny, I always thought the same thing about Gryffindors."

--

It did not take Harry long to pack is belongings. Severus insisted that the boy take a brief nap before apparating claiming that the journey would be painful for the still healing tissue on his back. Harry found out just how true that was when they took the abrupt journey to Hogsmead - the closest apparation point near the school.

He could not move without pain radiating up and down his back. He sucked in a painful breath and tried to relax, hoping that would help against the pain. Severus gave him a concerned glance.

"Are you alright, Harry?" The man asked quietly.

Harry nodded. "Yeah, I'll be just fine in a few minutes." He assumed. "Let's get going."

Their luggage had been flooed in some time earlier, but Harry had declined the fiery travel option firmly. The last thing he needed was to burn his back - although Severus had assured him this would not happen, he still had reservation about using the fireplace method. So, they had apparated with Snape hugging him lightly through the trip.

As they walked closer and closer towards the castle, Harry felt anticipation and excitement take the place of his earlier fear of rejection. He could not wait to see his friends again and hug them and talk to them and learn about what they had been up to. All of the time he had been gone they had not entered his mind for more than a few moments at a time, but now he felt like his heart might burst if he did not see them soon.

"Can I go to the Gryffindor tower first?" Harry begged, looking over at Snape.

"If you are wanting to see your friends, you do not have to go all the way up to the tower. They should be in the dinning hall right now. You should probably get something to eat as well." Snape suggested.

When they finally reached the inner courtyard at the entrance of the school, Harry hesitated momentarily as he remembered the dark energy that had greeted him the last time he crossed the stone floor. He shivered a little at the memories it brought back. He saw Voldemort's surprised expression as he fell to the floor of Dumbledore's office. He saw Lucius' face starring at him from inches away as dark powers sang through his body.

A hand appeared on his shoulder. "Harry, are you alright?" Snape asked worry clear in his dark eyes.

"I was...remembering." Harry ducked his head at what he perceived to be a weakness. "Forget it, it was nothing." He brushed a hand at his shoulder.

Snape wanted to say something, but he recognized the fact that the teenager did not want to talk about it so he nodded and lead the way across the courtyard and through the large arched doorway. Straight ahead of them was the doors to the Great Hall and Harry felt like he might throw up. Butterflies and nerveous energy left him super-charged with anticipation. As soon as the entered the room his gaze went to the Gryffindor table in search of his two best friends.

When they entered the room the talking stopped as everyone starred at the unlikely couple, then whispering began and the entire room was shooting them strange glances. It did not bother Harry at all, he was used to a lifetime of odd stares and misunderstood gossip. He was just happy to be back - to be home at Hogwarts.

"I am going to go talk to Dumbledore and inform him of your decision." Snape motioned towards the head table. "You go find your friends and we'll meet up later." He hesitated a moment before adding in a low tone. "If you get overwhelmed, don't hesitate to come and get me. I'm here to help you...I want to help you, if you need it."

Harry nodded and they parted ways. Snape going to the head table and Harry practically skipping over to his house table. Maroon and gold colors assailed him and he smiled, he had missed those colors. The first Gryffindors he met were Ginny and Seamus who ran up to him with huge grins spread across their faces.

"Harry! You're back!" They cried simultaneously.

They hugged him fiercly and then each took an arm and they walked to the table together.

"Where's Hermione and Ron?" Harry asked after having been greeted by the rest of the table with varying degrees of enthusiasm.

There was a silence, then Ginny spoke up - her face going crimson. "Hermione had some overdue ...work to do and Ron is 'helping' her." She raised her eyebrows in a hinting fashion.

Harry's brow furrowed in confusion. "What? Hermione always finishes her work on time and what could Ron possibly be helping her with."

Ginny rolled her eyes to the ceiling and opened her mouth to respond, but Seamus beat her to it.

"They're out snogging somewhere." He explained with a sly grin.

Harry felt shocked. He had been missing for months without a word to his two best friends and when he finally was able to see them again...they were making out somewhere in the castle? He sat down abruptly.

"Wow." He tried to think of something else to say, but nothing came to him. This was such an unexpected development. "Huh."

"It's been pretty disgusting, if you must know." Ginny said with a sigh. "They are always touching and cooing and calling each other 'darling' and 'cutsie-pie' it's revolting." She made a gagging sound.

Harry laughed. The entire situation hit him as extremely funny. "Well, at least Ron is learning something." He joked with a bright smile.

It felt so good to be surrounded by other teenagers his own age and to see his friends again. Ginny had grown into quite the beautiful young woman and if her constant eye flutters in Seamus' direction were any indication, she would likely follow in her older brother's romantic footsteps all too soon. Harry felt truly happy sitting at the table with them. He looked up to the head table, caught Severus' eye and gave a thumbs up. The man seemed to relax visibly at this indication that all was going well.

"Harry, you have got to tell us where you've been all this time - but after I give you the latest Quidditch score - I'm captain this year, you know!" Ginny gushed happily.

Harry sat back and let the young woman go one to explain in detail the last quidditch game. By the end of it, Harry's back was aching from laughing too much, but with so much joy around him he could not be kept down even by the pain. He listened with rapt attention as Seamus told him some of the more entertaining mistakes made in transfiguration that year.

--

"...and then Sharon Lightfoot got her hair caught in the whirlpool she accidentally made when trying to transfigure her rainbow jello into a chair." Harry giggled as he explained to Snape on the way down to their quarters in the dungeons. "And then - and then." He laughed harder as he pictured the last part. "Her hair started to change color and by the end, half of her hair was bright green and the rest of it auburn." He had to stop and lean against the wall as another laughter attack sent shooting pain through his back. He smiled happily over at Snape, who was watching him with a mixture of extreme amusement and concern.

"You should rest and take another vial of pain relief." The man suggested once they had continued on their way.

Harry shook his head, still laughing. "Nah, I really would like to see Hermione and Ron." His face fell a little as he thought about their new romantic relationship. "Why didn't you tell me that they were going out?" He asked.

"I did not know that as a fact, in my class the students tend to be more...conservative in their interactions - as you should well remember."

"Yeah, you didn't give us much choice there." Harry complained with a mock glare.

"Indeed." Snape responded. "As for your friends, I can summon them if you wish, but not until you have rested. Your body needs to heal."

Harry nodded grudgingly. "Okay, but not for too long, right?"

"An hour should be sufficient."

Harry thought an hour was an inordinately long amount of time for a mid-afternoon nap, but he did not say anything. He wanted nothing more than to see his best friends and tell them everything that had happened to him since the beginning of he summer. It had taken him this long to tell them, and he did not want to put it off any longer. One look at Snape's firm expression told him that no amount of begging would lessen the hour deadline. With a sigh he resigned himself to the wait.

--

"Harry, is that you?" Hermione asked.

The young woman had just walked through the door to his new room. She looked radiant, Harry thought as he looked her over for the first time in forever. Her long curly hair fell in waves down her back and shimmered with an almost unreal glow - he wondered if she had spelled it - and her body looked fit like she had been working out. He turned his attention to the blushing Ron and wondered if they had been working out together. He shook his head with a smile.

He pushed himself carefully off of the bed and went to greet his two best friends. Ron looked even taller than the last time he had seen him and when he got close enough to hug them, he found himself at eye height with the other teen's shoulder.

"Hey, guys." He hugged them to himself tightly. "I missed you both a lot." He said with feeling.

Already in a vulnerable emotional state, he could not fight off the tears. He felt a little embaressed to let them fall in front of his friends, but there was nothing that he could do to stop them. Pulling back from the hug, he wiped at his eyes with the sleeve of his sweater. Both Ron and Hermione exchanged looks of deep concern. They had never seen him cry since Cedrics death at the end of the Tri Wizard Tournament.

"Harry?" Hermione asked softly, reaching forward hesitantly to lightly brush his shoulder. "Do you need me to get McGonagall? Are you alright?" She asked, worry shinning in her eyes.

Harry wiped at his eyes again and sucked in a deep, calming breath. "No, no this is - this is normal...now." He said through the tears. He tried to make them stop, the last thing that he wanted was to ruin this evening. He just wanted to spend time with his friends.

Ron took a step towards the door. "I could go get the Headmaster or Madam Pomfrey if you need? I don't think that this is normal." The red haired boy said with a frown.

At the moment Harry felt so emotionally confused that he really wanted to be alone, but he needed to be with his friends. To know that they were truly okay; to hear how they had become a couple. He closed his eyes, breathed deeply again and then opened them back up. Nothing had changed, tears were still falling and he still did not feel in control.

"I need Severus." He whispered urgently. He knew the man would be able to help him.

Ron and Hermione exchanged another look - this one full of disbelief - then Hermione took Harry by the shoulder.

"Professor Snape is in class right now, Harry." She said softly sounding a little confused by his request. "We're here for you - there's nothing to be ashamed of." Her voice grew quieter and more serious. "The Headmaster told us about your family and about professor Lupin."

Harry could have laughed at the rediculous wave of depression that came out of nowhere and attacked him at the mention of Remus. He had not truly mourned the death of his father's best friend and now it hit him like the proverbial ton of bricks. He fell to his knees on the hard floor unable to look at his friends.

"Just get Severus." He pleaded in a tired, dead voice.

This day had started with such promise. Mere minutes before he had been happy and contented - now he was a wreck and his friends were there to witness him falling to pieces. He covered his face with his hands. He could hear Ron trying to comfort him, but the words were meaningless. What he needed was Snape. His protector. He could not hear Hermione anymore and hoped that it was because she was flooing the potions classroom.

The boy's breath caught in his throat and he felt the now familiar onset of hyperventilation fall over him. His breath hiccouphed and then he felt his chest get heavier and it became harder to fill his lungs with much needed air.

"Harry, hang in there...Hermione is getting help!" Ron's frantic voice floated from somewhere far away. "Just breath, okay, mate? Breath!"

Harry tried to, but he just could not. "Severus." He choked out desperately, his hand groping for his potions master.

--

Snape stumbled out of the floo his gaze instantly searching out and focusing on his distraught son. He ran over to his side, black robe flapping, and gathered the young man up in his arms.

"Oh, Harry." He said softly. "You are alright. I'm here. You will be okay." He reassured in a silky voice. His hands rubbing light circles on the boy's back.

Harry buried his face in the man's robe and latched on to the material. He was sobbing and fighting for every breath. Snape continued to whisper soothing words in the boy's ear. He glared at his son's friends.

"What happened here?" He growled protectively. "What did you do?"

Ron opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water. "Uhhh.."

Hermione shot Ron a harsh look. "He started crying after he hugged us and then I mentioned Remus - which I admit was a bad choice, I'm sorry - and then he just started to have a real fit."

Snape glared harder, his eyes squinting at them. "I think you have done enough here, please, leave."

Hermione looked on the verge of arguing when Harry said.

"I'll see you later, guys. I just need to be alone right now."

Severus pointed to Hermione. "I need you to tell the Headmaster that my class was left unsupervised." He instructed harshly.

She nodded and with one last worried look at Harry she grabbed Ron's wrist and the two left Snape's quarters. The man turned back to his adopted son and held him close, comforting him.

--

Harry felt raw inside from all of the mourning he had covered already. It helped to know that he had someone there with him who understood. He knew that Severus had left his potions classroom to come and help him when he needed the man. This confirmed the trust he had placed in Severus when had agreed to the adoption.

"Are you okay now?" Snape asked softly.

The boy was breathing better but tears still fell from his brilliant green eyes.

"I will be, now that you're here." Harry said with a sniffle.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Snape asked after a moment.

"No."

Accepting this abrupt answer, Severus took the boy in his arms and stood. He carried Harry back to the bed and laid him gently above the covers.

"I am not going anywhere, Harry. If you need me, I will be right here and I will not leave until you are ready to talk about Lupin."

Harry sniffled again and kept a strong grip on the man's clothes. "Don't leave." He murmered.

"I will not." Snape promised.

They sat like that for some time before Harry started talking in a monotone voice. The teenager almost did not seem aware that he was speaking aloud.

"She said that Dumbledore told her about my family and." His breath hitched and then evened out. "and Remus. I don't know why things are affecting me this way, but they are and there is nothing that I can do to s-stop it. Thank you, for coming - I needed you here."

Snape held his hand over Harry's that were gripping his robe. "I will always be here for you until I die. You are my single priority now. Nobody in the entire wizard world could possible endure what you have alone...you will not be alone anymore, Harry. I swear it."

Harry felt his tears start afresh, but this time out of happiness. He grinned through the saddness he felt over Remus' death. He did not have to fight anymore. . .he was not just Harry Potter, he was the son of Severus Snape. Four months ago this would have seemed an impossible thing, now he was eternally grateful for Lucius interferance. Without those months that interrupted his life, he would not have Severus. How he had ever hated the caring, strong man sitting next to him was a mystery.

After all of the evening's excitement, Harry felt exhaustion pulling him towards sleep. His back ached dully as he let unconsciousness claim him.

"Don't leave...dad." He murmered as his eyes slid shut, his hands relaxing in their grip.

--

Severus looked down at the now sleeping boy. He would have never believed himself capable of raising a teenager, much less the savior of the entire wizard world - and more importantly, his own world - but here he was sitting over the boy who had freed him from the darkest evil in ages. For the thousandth time Severus pulled up the sleeve covering his forearm and and looked at the bare, pale skin that had replaced the dark lord's calling device. The dark mark.

He could still remember what the call felt like, the horrendous pain it had brought, but slowly the memory was fading. With Harry to care for now the memories of his dark past had taken a back seat to the more pressing matters that now surrounded him. He had meant everything he had promised the boy. If he had to die in the process, he would make sure that Harry experienced a normal and healthy life or as close as someone with Harry's history could get.

Taking out his wand, he spelled Harry under the covers and then physically tucked him in. He would stay with the boy until he woke up and then they would talk about Lupin, but for now he contented himself with just watching the boy sleep. Watching his son sleep. Severus smiled.

--

Hermione pulled Ron through the portrait of the Gryffindor tower. Neither had spoke since the unexplainable scene down in the dungeons.

"I thought it was kind of strange that they were living together, but I figured it had something to do with the Death Eaters. Dumbledore did say that it was for Harry's own protection." Ron said finally, in growing confusion and anger. "But he wanted SNAPE! Snape..why would Harry want us to leave when he was obviously hurt by something. Why Snape?" He demanded.

Hermione set them both down on the couch in front of the fireplace - no one else was in the tower - and crossed her legs. A thoughtful look fell over her face. She tapped her chin with an index finger.

"I am not sure, Ronald. We know that Harry has never trusted Snape. Whenever Voldemort chose to attack him, he would assume it was Snape doing the attacking - a large assumption on his part - it makes this all so much stranger." She held up one finger. "First, Harry bursts into tears...something disturbing in and of itself...then Secondly." She held up a second finger. "He would let only Snape comfort him. From this we can conclude-."

"He was brainwashed!" Ron interrupted eyes wide with horror. "Snape gave him some potion that made him believe that the slimy git was his friend or something!"

Hermione rolled her eyes with a grin. She loved his inability to grasp concepts. "No, Ronald, we can conclude that either Snape has changed over the summer or Harry was somehow convinced that he was not a threat. You know Harry - that would not be easy. The only way to really know is to wait until Harry is able to talk with us and explain. Until then, I am afraid it must remain a mystery."

Ron nodded, but his mind was still thinking about his own theory. "So, what potions do you think would cause this kind of brainwashing?" He asked seriously.

Hermione groaned and socked him in the arm lovingly. "Come here, you big lug." She said in a seductive, sweet voice. "I'll explain later..."

--

.THE END.


	5. Chapter 5

Heat Wave By Ebbtide Cheque

CHAPTER FIVE

STATISTICALLY SPEAKING

--

Harry rested in his bed, staring up at the ceiling of his room. This day had been one huge mistake, he thought with a sigh. It would have been better for everyone if he had taken it slower and waited a couple of weeks before tagging along with Snape to the school.

"This was stupid." He said aloud. "I should've known better."

His unsteady emotional fits should have pre-warned him that something like this would happen. Harry rolled over onto his side and closed his eyes tight. In his mind's eye he saw Hermione and Ron in the seconds before they left. Neither appeared happy. He shook his head and pushed himself slowly up into a sitting position. His back still hurt, but not as much as it had before his short nap.

"Harry, are you awake?" Severus inquired from the other room, it sounded like he was eating something.

A rumble in his stomach reminded Harry that he had missed lunch. He carefully stood to his feet before calling back.

"Yes, dad."

There was a little laugh from the other room. "Your adoption papers have not even been returned with the offical seal and already I have been christened 'dad'." There was amusement in the man's tone.

Harry grinned as he walked out to join his dad in the living room area. "I thought old man was a bit much." He said with a giggle. "Do you think I made a good call?"

Severus smiled contentedly and patted a place beside him on the couch which Harry gladly accepted. He leaned against the man's side and let himself relax into the soft cushions.

"You made the only call." The man replied with mock severity.

"So, what were you eating?" Harry asked hungrily, his eyes searching for something edible around his adopted father. The man laughed again and pulled out a bag of chocolate chip cookies from a pocket of his robe.

"My comfort food." He explained with a blush and a shrug.

Harry gratefully took the offered bag and began to munch on the snack. "Brilliant." He said through a full mouth. "My dad has a sweet tooth." At this Snape frowned in disaproval.

"I do NOT have a sweet tooth." He disagreed. "Albus Dumbledore has a sweet tooth. I merely enjoy fine cuisine."

Harry exhaled contentedly and relaxed even further. Everything felt so perfect in that moment. There he was munching a treat and sharing the company of his dad. He snuggled up a little closer into the black robes and felt an arm go around him, hugging him loosely.

"You do know that I am not letting you leave here until we talk about your latest panick attack." Snape brought up the subject directly. There was a steel in his voice that told Harry not to expect any leniency when it came to getting out of the talk.

The boy nodded his head. "I know, dad. I guess it should have been obvious to me that this would happen." He said bitterly. "It hadn't really hit me that Remus was gone - dead and gone. So much has happened to me recently that I thought I was doing better than I really was...or something." He did not know how to express what had been going on in his mind. "I guess I should have staid at your house for a while longer until I felt more comfortable talking about the Dursleys and stuff...and Lucius. I am going to have to tell Ron and Hermione about Lucius at some point, they deserve to know why I'm acting like this."

"You can still return to our house, no one is forcing you to stay. As a matter of fact, I would encourage you to return for now until you can better handle the schedule of classes. Your seventh year classes are very heavy on extra curicular hours."

"No." Harry said decidedly. "Everyone saw me arrive today. What will the Gryffindors think if I disapear again. There are already enough rumors going around about me, I don't want to add to that."

"I should warn you that some of the houses - namely my own - have also fabricated some rather interesting rumors about the meaning of our relationship." Snape said tightly rienging in his anger. "I thought that you should know before learning it from someone else during classes."

Harry sighed. "It's to be expected. It's not like I haven't dealt with a ton of rumors and gossip before. Remember the Tri Wizard Tournament...You won't get into trouble, will you?" He asked suddenly realizing what those kind of rumors could do for his dad's reputation. He frowned in worry. "I could publically disclaim them." He suggested.

Snape shook his head. "It is not our problem if people want to make up disgusting stories and no I am not going to get into trouble. Anyone with half of a brain would know Dumbledore could never leave you in a situation where you might get hurt."

The teenager stiffened. "Could've fooled me."

"Harry, I admit that the Headmaster is not perfect, but very few people know about your Aunt and Uncle. They think that you were raised by a pureblood family and spoiled until first year."

Harry's mouth fell open in shock. No wonder he got such awed looks from the younger witches and wizards. They probably thought that he lived in a golden castle or something. He groaned and slapped a hand to his forehead.

"No wonder the Slytherins hated me. No wonder you hated me, I know you don't like people who get better than they deserve. No offence."

"None taken. You are right, I believe that good things must be earned through hard work or intelligence. The Malfoy's are a very good example of pureblood snobbishness." Snape said.

"Snobishness, huh?" Harry asked with a grin. "Nice word usage. So, what am I doing for classes - sorry, for interrupting your class earlier, by the way." He hung his head.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Harry. It is not your fault that things have been hard for you and that now you are having a hard time dealing with it alone. I would suggest a therapist, but I think that we both know it would not help you."

Harry tried to picture himself pouring his soul out to some stranger and grimaced at the mental scenario. There was no way that he could blindly trust a therapist, not yet when he was in such a vulnerable state.

"You're right, dad. Not for the moment, anyway."

"Indeed."

"So, when do I start classes?" Harry returned to his original question. "I want to get into them as soon as possible."

Snape moved into a more comfortable position and took another cookie out of the bag before answering.

"I have already talked to your teachers and they know about your physical limits. I also told them that you were mentally fragile at the moment and that they should not push you too far at first. Most of them are just glad that you are finishing your schooling and they are willing to work with you through next summer if the need arises. For the most part, your teachers thought that after slaying Voldemort, you would not want to come back and do something as mundane as finish school."

"They obviously don't know me. You are one of my teachers, aren't you?" He asked worriedly.

"Not this year. Dumbledore hired a second potions instructor for the older students. She is very highly qualified and a nice woman."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "A woman is teaching seventh year potions?"

Snape gave him a sideways glance. "Dumbledore had me help with screening canidates so I know first hand just how good she is at brewing."

"But why aren't you teaching the older classes. Is Dumbledore mad at you?" Harry knew this was unlikely, but why else would his dad's job be cut in two.

"I asked for it."

Harry jerked his head around so that he could study the man's face. "You what?"

"I asked for someone to help me take the load." Snape replied calmly. "I wanted to be able to spend more time with you. Otherwise, we probably would never see each other, especially cosidering the strong class schedule you will be starting soon."

"Ohh..." Harry was speechless. His dad had given up the extra hours - and probably the extra pay - for him. "...Wow."

Snape squeezed the boy's shoulder, being careful not to aggrivate his back, and then let go of Harry so that he could stand to his feet.

"I forgot several things at our house and I was just going to floo over there to retrieve it. I wanted to ask you if there was anything that you wanted me to pick up."

"Nope."

"Alright, I will return momentarily."

Harry watched the man disapear into the fireplace in a cloud of green fire leaving the boy alone in the living room.

--

Harry dug into the bag of cookies, his hand went all the way to the back without encountering a single treat. He brought it up to his face and peered inside disapointed to find that the bag was empty. His stomach rumbled again and he rubbed it absently while wondering what he could find to eat. His wand - pocketed at all times - came out then and he murmered a quick tempus spell only to discover that it was past six o'clock in the evening and he had missed the dinner meal as well.

He snapped his fingers before remembering that Honey the house elf would not be able to answer his summons. He frowned, but before he could make another move something short and green popped into existence at his feet. He looked down and found himself face to face with the oddest looking elf he had ever seen.

"Grungy at your service." The voice was surprisingly deep and it took Harry off guard.

"I - Hello." The boy stammered.

The elf, just taller than Hermione's cat and covered in a bright green cloth from neck to toes, bowed low to the ground until its short pointed nose grazed the floor. It appeared to be a male elf, but Harry was not positive of its gender.

"Were you needing something, master Potter? Master Dumbledore said I should be taking care of you." The elf explained, waving it's stubby hands in the air as it spoke.

"Oh, alright. Ummm, I was wondering if I could get something to eat as I seem to have missed dinner." Harry stumbled, his mind still trying to reconcile the strange image of the creature before him. "Anything will do." He added knowing that house elves were particularly bound to please.

The house elf bowed, scampered a few feet backwards for no apparent reason and then disapeared with a poof!

"Weird."

--

When Snape returned, it was not empty handed. He carried two folders under one arm and a black tote slung over one shoulder.

"I see you have faired well enough in my absence." He commented with a nod at the overflowing platter of food set out in front of Harry.

"Yes. I met the wierdest little elf creature...Grungy." Harry said as he took a bite out of a juicy orange.

Snape nodded thoughtfully. "I know Grungy well, when I was a Death Eater he was the elf that reported my movements to Dumbledore. After I turned against the dark lord he became one of my most trusted allies in the castle."

Harry tried to picture the little elf doing all of that. "You're kidding, right?"

"Grungy really was a lifeline for me during some of my darkest years." Severus fell quiet as he remembered just how bad that time of his life had truly been. He rubbed his forehead to forestall the migraine that always accompanied memories of his early adulthood. He used occlumancy to clear away the painful pictures his mind dug up.

"Dad?" Harry asked worriedly.

He had come to stand next to the man's shoulder and he gently laid a hand on Snape's arm in comfort. The teenager recognized the expression as one that he wore far too often. The boy knew his dad must be remembering past experiences and past actions. A cloud of guilt fell over the man's face and he turned away.

"Let me help." Harry begged quietly. "Like you did for me. I want to help you too...dad."

Snape drew in a shaky breath and nodded, turning back to face his adopted son. Tears shone in the low light of the dungeon room, but they did not fall. He had better self control than that.

"It has been a long time since I have seen Grungy and talking about him brought back a lot of stuff, that is all. Nothing to worry about, Harry." He said with a forced smile trying to appear nonchalant.

Harry was not believing a word of it. "I understand what it's like to suddenly be faced with a familiar situation or name or smell or word that reminds you of something horrible and terrible and painful." He tried to articulate. "I know what it's like to not be able to control your feelings and then - all of a sudden - they're controling you and everything is different. Memories can be so strong. Dad, I know."

The man looked at him long and hard. "I know that you do, Harry. I just do not want my burdens to be yours as well."

"We're family now, and families share their problems and work through them together." Harry said firmly. "Now, do you want to talk about it."

Snape half-laughed at hearing his own words being spoken back to him. "No, son. Not now at any rate. It really is nothing, I'm fine now."

Harry studied him critically and in truth the man did look better. Actually, he looked completely normal unlike a few seconds before. The boy let his hand fall away from his father's arm, but he did not back off. He wanted to be there for his dad in the same way that Severus had helped him the past months. Snape readjusted the tote bag that he still carried over one shoulder.

"I should probably go unpack these things." He said. "You are welcome to join me if you want."

Harry followed his father into another room that looked like a study. The walls were blank and there was a large desk dominating one side, it was covered in papers and books. Several quills were scattered around a spelled ink well.

"We will unpack them over here." Snape said from beside a bookcase. It was short and small and located just slightly in front of the desk, against the wall. He set the tote down on the floor and together they worked on emptying it.

--

Hermione clasped Ron's hand in hers tightly as they approached Snape's quarters for the seconds time in one day. After their abrupt dismissal that morning, Hermione was itching for some answers. Worry for her friends well being motivated her, but deep down her logical mind needed some further answers to reconcile the dramatic change in Harry Potter.

"You don't think it really is brainwashing then?" Ron asked with a nerveous swallow.

Hermione shook her head seriously. "No, Ron. What we are dealing with is a good deal more dangerous than brainwashing potions...I'm pretty sure there's no such thing, by the way. What Harry seems to have developed is a mental disorder. A syndrom normally caused in abduction cases in which the captive and captor eventually create a bond."

"He's _bonded_ to Snape!" Ron exclaimed hysterically. "That slimy, disgusting, git - we need to get McGonagall."

Hermione held on to his hand tighter to stop him from marching right back up to the Gryffindor tower.

"Not a literal bond, Ronald, an emotional bond."

"Oh. Wait, a what?"

They reached the closed door of the private rooms and Hermione knocked gently. There was no response so she knocked louder, drawing her wand.

There was a call from inside and then footsteps could be heard. The door flew open and they were suddenly face to face with an annoyed looking potions master.

"Yes?" He asked dryly.

"We wanted to know if Harry was feeling better." Hermione said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, we wanna talk to him." Ron added with a suspicious look at the professor. "To make sure that he is really okay."

Snape took a step back and opened the door wider. "Harry you have visitors again."

--

"Let me see if I've got this right, you agreed to let Snape adopt you? You didn't even put up a fight or a fuss or anything?" Ron stressed in disbelief.

"He's not that bad, Ron." Harry said defensively. "You don't know him that's all. If you two really got to know him, you might like him."

"Might, Harry." Ron said, folding his arms over his chest.

"Statistically speaking, there are not a lot of lasting adoptions in the wizarding world." Hermione broke in with an all knowing smile. "Usually it takes a few years, but they normally do not last. Compared to muggle adoptions I have read that statistically speaking the wizard orphans are better off in foster care. I'm not saying that this thing you have with professor Snape won't work out. It is just statistis, after all."

Harry spluttered angrily for a few seconds before he could say anything coherent. "You think that ANYTHING in my life can be governed by statistics?" He asked loudly.

Hermione blushed. "Well, no - not really." She answered.

"Good. Because this 'thing' with Severus is not going to end in a year or a few years or ever, do you understand!?"

"Calm down, Harry." Ron broke in, his hand coming to rest protectively on Hermione's knee. "She is just trying to show you that this might not be the best thing for you. Did you ever think that this might be a mistake? I mean, it's SNAPE we're talking about here."

"Precisely." Hermione rejoined. "I am sure that he is a great teacher, but do you really want your entire future in his hands."

Harry nodded. That was exactly what he wanted. Snape to be there with him from now on to help him through the hard times that he knew would come. He needed the man in his life - he wanted the man to be his father.

"Yes." He answered firmly. "Now, if all you came down here to do was insult my Dad, then you can just leave." He pointed to the door of the quarters. "And if you are going to continue bad mouthing him without any clue of what is really going on then we might have to rethink the exact degree of our friendship." It took a lot for him to say that. He missed his friends and wanted nothing more than to hang out with them and laugh and joke, but he would not let them think Snape was anything less than his Dad and a decent man.

Ron and Hermione exchanged a glance and Ron's hand slid off her knee. "We're worried about you, mate. It's not about Snape, not really, it's about you."

"Harry, we want to know that you are okay." Hermione said. "You didn't look very okay ealier."

Harry ran a hand over his eyes. "A lot of stuff has happened to me over the last few months and I'm just having a hard time dealing, that's all...dad's helping me."

"Snape is helping you!" Ron corrected with a tinge of anger. "And what can he do that we can't?"

"He understands. He knows what I'm going through. I need that kind of support right now and that is something that you two just can't give me." He took a deep breath. "That doesn't mean I don't need you too, because I do. I've missed you and I want to spend time with you. Your my best friends...I had just hoped that you would trust me enough to accept whoever I choose as my dad."

"I do trust you...but...Snape?" Ron screwed his face up into an expression of distaste.

"I just want to know that you are okay." Hermione said, biting her lip in worry. "We care about you and want you to be safe and happy."

"I am. Besides, Dumbledore wouldn''t let me be harms way." He added, trying to convince them.

Hermione raised a challenging eyebrow. "The Dursleys?"

Harry frowned remembering his own similar reaction when Severus had made the same claim.

"They were a mistake, but this isn't. You have to trust me." The boy pleaded.

The room fell silent as his two best friends thought this over. It was hard for them to just accept the sudden change between Harry and the Hogwarts professor, but they had learned to believe Harry's instincts. After a few moments, Hermione nodded and Ron gave Harry a little smile.

"Alright, have it your way. We trust you, mate." Ron said. "Just be careful."

--

Once they were gone Severus returned from where he had been in his own room with the door warded for silence to give them some privacy.

"How did it go?" He asked accioing a bag of cookies.

Harry took an offered cookie and sat back on the couch with a heavy sigh.

"Better than I thought it would, not as good as I had hoped." He replied.

Harry sat munching away at chocolate chip cookies lost in his own thoughts. It took him a while to realize that his adopted father had asked him another question.

"Hmm? What? I was distracted."

"I said, 'have you thought at all about returning to the tower?'." The man repeated.

"Yes, and I think I would like to try it temporarily just to see how well I cope with being up there. You know, the last time I was there all I could think about was the Dursleys...and how much I had lost. I don't want those memories coming back, but I don't want to be afraid to go into my own common room."

"I will help you face these fears, Harry." Severus promised. "You won't be alone when you go up there. We can wait until all of the students are at lunch tomorrow and then I can help you move in. That way no one has to know if you are unable to stay - and I'll be there incase you need me."

Harry felt warmth flood through him. He could not beleive how lucky he was to have Severus.

"Thank you."

"Of course, we will then have to discuss rules."

"Rules?" Harry asked in confusion.

"Yes, you will still require potions - which I will not trust your fellow classmates to leave alone. You will need to come down here for them each night - you may use the floo - and that broaches the question of curfew."

"Oh."

"I have already talked to your head of house and she is willing to give you leniency as far as the school rules are concerned." His expression became more stern. "I, however, am not. As your father it is my duty to keep you from setting a bad example among the other students. I will expect you here every night at ten forty-five. That will give you plenty of time to take your potions and return to the tower before the eleven o'clock curfew."

Harry shifted nerveously. What if he panicked in the middle of the night or if he needed to talk to his father about something important. Former abuse suffered at the hands of his Aunt and Uncle left him unsure of what rules meant. If he disobeyed a rule in the Dursley household he would go for days without food and his chore list would be trippled. He knew that Snape would never starve him - and the man had yet to assign a single chore - but that left him with a large empty space of unknown. He felt too emberassed to ask what punishments he should expect.

"Okay. Curfew, potions, eleven." He said with forced lightness. "Piece of cake."

"Good, now that we have covered that I will go and fetch you some dinner. Tomorrow will be a big day so I expect you to take your sleeping potion early tonight." Snape said. "I will be gone to classes before you wake up, but I will see you at breakfast in the Great hall."

--

The next morning dawned bright and clear, though Harry could not tell that from his room deep within the Hogwarts dungeons. He dressed quickly and was about to leave for the great hall when something caught the corner of his eye. He heard a familiar shuffling of pages. Looking over to an open trunk beside his bed, he saw the talking book sitting inside. It flipped itself open as if inviting him to come and read. Curious, he walked over and picked it up gingerly. Although it had not hurt him yet, he was still wary of magical books. He could not remember packing the book, but it had somehow gotten into his things.

It had opened itself to page one-hudred-and-twenty. Harry read the first paragraph, the narrator type voice following along in sync.

"_Discipline is by far a witch or wizards most intense ally." _

Harry snorted at that statement.

_"Without proper education and discipline, any undertaking would be effectively sabatoged from the inside. Our everyday decisions are relevant to life changing decisions. If you do not have proper priorities in one then it is safe to assume that you will fail at any undertaking. Discipline is more than rules and priorities, it is self-dependence._

_A very simple solution for the undisciplined is to create a complete list of personal priorities which can then be used as goal motivators." _

Harry thought this over, setting the book back down inside the open trunk. Maybe that would help him to be a better son. After all, Snape seemed to appreciate a disciplined mind - the suposed lack of parental discipline being the instigator of a seven year long grudge between them.

On his way up to the Great Hall and all throughout breakfast he remained preoccupied with thoughts of what little he had read that morning. The boy decided then that he would read more of the book later that night once Snape was asleep. Still disillusioned with the idea that his guardian might feel compelled to take the book away from him, he would keep it hidden.

The stolen book was not the only secret that he kept from the man. He still had not mentioned the invisibility cloak, his father's map or the room of requirements. He hoarded these personal treasures in his tower room under a floor board only known by himself and Ron. He was eager to return to the tower if only to see them again and hold the map and cloak in his hands. They had always been an encouragement to him in the darkest of times. He figured that as a responsible adult, Severus would have to take them away. Especially with his interest in Hogwarts rules.

Harry remembered their talk the night before and grimaced. With his father's will wieghing on his consciounse, he would never be able to live with himself if he broke the curfew his father set. The boy had very few role models - those he had held up on pedastels being dead - and he was unsure of how to much to reveal to his adopted father right away. He trusted the man and knew that in the near future he would bring up his precious treasures...even if it meant losing them, but for now they would be kept secret.

That decided, Harry was finally able to focus on the things around him. To his surprise over half of the day was passed and gone. He was in the Great Hall again eating lunch. The first part of the day had been a blur to him, but he remembered vaugely that he had been introduced to his classes.

--

Harry dropped his fork into his food, his eyes widening. He had started classes! He slapped his forehead and groaned. All morning he had been so preoccupied that he had just functioned on autopilot through his morning classes and now he could not remember anything that had been taught.

"Great! Just great!" He exclaimed angrily. He could not believe how stupid he had been. The book had left him so busy thinking that he had went through everything in a daze. He was surprised that his friends had not noticed.

Harry looked over to Ron and Hermione - they were sitting so close together they were practically on top of each other. They were talking in whispers and leaning close to each other in an intimate way. Hermione laughed and smiled at something and Ron rolled his eyes with a grin. Harry felt happy for them and the love that they had obviously found in his absence, but a sting of betrayal also accompanied that feeling.

"Get a room already!" Seamus told the couple from farther down the table. He made a noise of disgust.

Ron glared at him and hugged Hermione close. "Don't throw a fuss just because you don't have the guts to get your own girlfriend."

Harry frowned. "Ron, please." He tried to cut in before there was a fight. "You guys are kinda..." He did not know what to say. "Mushy?" He finished uncertainly.

"Yeah and it's disgusting and you are getting on everyone's nerves." Ginny spoke up matter-of-factly from Harry's left. The red haired girl pointed her spoon at her older brother. "I'm glad that you two like each other, but tone it down already."

Hermione looked offended by the entire conversation. She stuck her nose up in the air and grabbed Ron's arm.

"Let's get out of here." They young woman said with a glare at Ginny. "We obviously are not welcomed here."

Harry stood to his feet when she began to march off with Ron in tow. "Hermione, wait." He called. "You don't have to go..."

They were already out of earshot. With a heavy sigh Harry sat back down. This day had went from bad to worse. First he ignored everything around him and now he had distanced his best friends. He looked back down at his plate of food no longer hungery and pushed it away.

"Hey, what's the next class?" He asked Ginny.

The red head opened her own school bag and pulled out a schedule. "Umm, Potions with that new teacher, Sandra Higgnite." She replied.

"I think I'll go take a walk before potions then." He said quietly.

--

He walked out of the Great Hall, his gaze focused on the cold stone floor. He was trying to figure out how he could possibly make up with his friends now. All he could hope was that Hermione would come around once she calmed down. He knew that she was a very intelligent young woman and normally level headed, but personal insults were something she had never tolerated very well. Harry understood that.

"A little teenage drama never hurt anyone." Snape commented with amusement.

Harry jerked his head up and found himself inches away from running into the tall man. Snape combed his long black banges behind one ear with his fingers and studied Harry closely.

"Are you alright, Harry. You have looked a little distance all day. I am sorry that it took me this long to help you." He said seriously.

Harry stared at him blankly. "Help me?"

"We were going to move you into the Gryffindor tower...unless you have changed your mind?"

Harry shook his head. "No. I'm sorry, Dad, I've been a little preoccupied with stuff."

Snape laughed gently and they started down the hall towards the tower. Harry liked his adopted father's laugh. It was light and genuine. Harry joined in with a giggle of his own even though he was not sure what the potions master had found entertaining.

"Yes, I saw a bit of what must be preoccupying you. So, Ron and Hermione are 'mushy' are they?" He asked with a laugh.

Harry turned to him in surprise. "You could hear that?" He asked worriedly.

Snape gave him a reassuring smile. "Do not worry so much, Harry. The head table is spelled so that we can easily hear any student conversations. Did you ever wonder how Dumbledore seems to know everything?"

Harry nodded.

"Well, now you know the secret." Snape winked down at him. "Nothing mysterious about it at all."

"That man is a master of manipulation." Harry commented.

"Indeed he is."

--

Harry stood in the common room next to the fireplace. He looked down into it and remembered the fire conversations he had carried on with Sirius when the man had still been alive. A melancholy mood fell over him and all of the earlier frivolaty was forgotten. Snape staid by his shoulder, ready to help if Harry needed him.

"I talked to Sirius in this fireplace. He fire called me." Harry said with a catch in his voice. "At first, I didn't know what it was ...freaked me out."

Severus remained silent, letting the boy talk. Harry walked around the tower, lost in rememberances. He came to a stop in front of a window sill.

"I used to let Hedwig in here at night, she would sit here with me while I watched the stars and I would pet her. Hedwig is at the Weasley's. I don't even know if she would recognize me anymore, owls don't have the best memories, you know."

"I know." Snape murmered.

"I miss her." Harry felt the first tears begin to slide down his cheek. He let them fall.

"We can still get her back, Harry." Snape spoke up softly, his hand falling on the boy's shoulder. "If she does not remember you...she will have to be reintroduced. If she held such a strong bond with you before there is no reason to assume it will not be the same this time."

"I guess." Harry said uncertainly. "I sure would like to see her again." He wiped away the wetness on his cheeks. "But I won't be able to see her if I stay in the dungeons."

"I do not see a reason for you to return. Your return here has been painful, I realize that, but not so painful that would forever isolate yourself from your fellow Gryffindors indefinently."

Harry looked up at the man. "I guess that you're right, Dad."

They continued the tour of the tower with Harry commenting on several other areas of special emotional importance, but none of them overwhelmed him to the same extent of the fire place and window. After they had gone over the entire length and height of the tower, Harry was satisfied that no nasty emotional surprises awaited him if he chose to move back up.

"I guess I can move my stuff up after my last class tonight." The boy said.

Snape nodded in agreement. "I concur." His wand suddenly appeared in one hand and he muttered a quick tempus spell. It was almost time for the potions class.

"I should get going, Dad." Harry said.

"Yes, I have a potions class to teach, as well. So, I will see you tonight." They headed out of the portrait door together. "And Harry, have a good class. I know that you will like Sandra - she is a really nice woman."

Harry smiled. "Then I'm sure that I will. Bye, Dad."

They seperated at the bottom of the moving staircase. Harry moved into a jog, he did not want to be late for the first class he would be consciouse of for the day. He wondered what Sandra Higgnite would be like as a potions teacher. A pange of regret flashed through his heart at the knowledge that his dad should have been teaching the class and was not because of him. He pushed these thoughts away and hurried faster down the stone halls of Hogwarts.

--

Harry was two turns away from the potions classroom when he ran into Hermione - hard. They both fell over at the unexpected impact. The young woman cried out in pain when her elbow impacted the floor.

"Oww!" She wailed, clutching her arm against her chest. "What was that for, Harry?" She demanded.

Harry picked himself up and extended a helping hand down to her. "I'm sorry, Hermione. I guess I wasn't looking where I was going." He apologized averting his gaze. The last thing that he wanted to do was make things worse between them. "I really am sorry."

Her angry scowl melted into a concerned frown. "No, I'm sorry, Harry. I should have never said what I did in the Great Hall. . .I was being a jerk." She admitted flushing. "That doesn't give you the right to run into me though." She muttered in mock anger.

Harry smiled, feeling that their friendship would be okay with this vieled attempt on the young woman's part. He had felt a betrayal earlier when she and Ron had deserted him after their long speech about being concerned for his well being. Now he did not know what to believe, but that did not mean that he was ready to give up on their friendship.

"I'm sorry too, Hermione." He said finally.

"I was waiting to apologize so this was kinda my fault too." The girl laughed, her earlier anger forgotten. "I was trying to think of how to apologize and I was not paying attention. I'm sorry."

Turning towards the classroom together they walked in companionable silence.

"Where's Ron?" Harry asked as they approached the potions lab. He was surprised that the red head youth was not in her company. "Is he okay?"

She shrugged. "Yeah, he's fine, but for some reason he chose not to take potions this year." She said with a confused frown. "I cannot understand how he expects to excell in life if he does not choose to broaden his education at every available oppurtunity."

Harry grinned. "I have to say that I agree with Ron on this one, Hermione. If I didn't think my parents would have wanted this for me...I would probably be with him doing whatever he's doing right now."

"Quidditch practice." Hermione said with an eyeroll at the ceiling.

"You're kidding!" Harry exclaimed in envy. He would give anything to get back on his broom. He had not been able to ride it since before his capture by Lucius.

"Unfortunately, no."

Then they had to stop talking because they had entered the classroom. Harry and Hermione chose two seats at the front of the class - everything else was already taken.

--

Steriotypical...


	6. Chapter 6

Heat Wave by Ebbtide Cheque

CHAPTER SIX

WOMAN OR MONSTER

--

The potions classroom became quiet as the seventh years got themselves settled into place. Harry felt a growing curiosity. After all of the good things that Snape had to say about the woman, he could not help but wonder what Sandra Higgnite would be like in person. He pictured a female version of Snape...and shuddered. Long black hair, deep sallow cheeks and a quick frown were not his idea of an attractive teacher. Though he would never say a word to his adopted father.

There was a shuffling sound outside of a door at the head of the room behind the teacher's desk. The door vibrated for a second before blasting off of its hinges in a cloud of smoke. It landed harmlessly on the stone floor. All of the chatter stopped abruptly and Harry waited expectantly for the first site of his new potions teacher.

A small silhuoutte left a dark shadow on the doorframe before an average looking woman walked into the room. If Harry had not known better he would have classed her as a muggle. Small, almost non-existent glasses perched pecariously on the edge of her nose and she looked over them at her students. Her long brunette hair was curled up over her head and kept in place with a pink pencil. The woman wore jeans and a loose black turtleneck with an incidental robe over them. She had a kind, but average face and nothing about her seemed even remotely witch-ish.

The woman straightened her robe and clapped her hands together unnecessarily to gain their already gathered attention. She smiled.

"Sorry about that rather dramatic entrance. I've been having some problems with my wand lately." She shrugged as if it was an ordinary occurance. "Now on to the lesson for today: applied brewing using golden cauldrons and the effect of heightened temperature on potion results."

Harry looked around himself and found the other students already opening their books to the correct pages. He took out his own potions book and snatched a glance at Hermione's page number before turning there himself. His desk darkened as a shadow fell over him, he glanced up and found himself staring at professor Higgnite. She was looking him up and down with pursed lips.

"Harry Potter, I presume." She said with a significant glance at his exposed scar. "I was told that you need special treatment. I don't care who you are - in my class you do not get treated any differently than the others. If you chose to neglect the beginning of the year then you will have to catch up in your free time. I will give you a list of missed lessons, but I expect you to keep up with my class. Do you understand?"

The average, unthreatening woman had been replaced by a dark scowl and harsh tones. Harry could have groaned aloud. Why did he always seem to draw out the negative side of his teachers? He wondered in self-pity. He slid down farther in his seat.

"Yes, ma'am." He said in a soft tone. The boy remembered feeling like this in front of his Aunt Petunia a thousand times. "I'll try my best."

The Potions Professor snorted and turned away from his desk to return to her own. "See that you do more than try, Mister Potter."

Harry's mouth fell open in disbelief. He knew those words. He knew that tone. He decided he was still dreaming. No way had that woman just sounded exactly like Snape. No way in the world. A light poke on his side from Hermione brought his attention back to the class and he listened attentively as Sandra Higgnite began a complicated explanation of the affects temperature had on brewing potions.

By the end of the first class Harry had to admit that she was really good at explaining things. He felt like he had learned more in that one class than the entire summer weeks he had spent with Snape. It was not that his adopted Dad was bad at teaching - he just tried to get as much across as possible with the least amount of speaking. Sandra had no problem elaborating on the different techniques and causalitites. Harry would have probably liked her if she had not frowned every time she looked his way. The teenager had no idea what he had done to displease her, but he knew that before the next class he would have to read the missed sections of his potions book.

Hermione volunteered her help when he mentioned studying in the library during dinner. So after a few quick bites of food that night they headed out of the Great Hall together. Ron, upon hearing their plans, suddenly remembered a Quidditch move he wanted to try out. With the red head boy outside, Harry and Hermione started studying in earnest soon losing track of time.

--

"Where is that boy?" Snape asked his chocolate chip cookie before visciously biting into it and chewing it a bit too vigerously.

He did not want to be angry with Harry, that was the last thing his adopted son needed right now, but he felt a well of annoyance threaten to end his attempt at patience. The man had expected Harry to come down to the dungeons directly after dinner so that they could together move his stuff up to the tower room.

It was now three hours later with no sign of Harry. Snape had searched much of the castle and still he could not find the boy. Worry warred with impatience. He began to pace, banishing the cookie bag. The treat could not console him any longer. The way he felt surprised him a little. Severus knew that he had grown attached to the boy - he had adopted him for Merlin's sake! - but this worry over the boy was much deeper than it had ever been. Even when Lucius had kidnapped Harry he had only been concerned for the saftey of a child. Now it was the safety of his son. At the same time he was upset at Harry for leaving him there to worry. It was all so confusing for the man. He was not quite sure how to deal with this new found parental instinct.

Snape shook his head and stopped pacing. His dark eyes found the fireplace and he cursed himself internally for not thinking of it earlier. He would talk to Dumbledore. The old man may have his moments of manipulation, but he was foremost Severus' best friend and mentor. Taking a handful of gray floo powder, Snape transported himself to the Headmaster's office.

Dumbledore was sitting behind his large desk, Fawkes on one shoulder, both seemed to be looking at a scroll. When Snape exited the fireplace, Dumbledore looked up. The old man smiled.

"Severus! How are you today, my friend?" He asked with a knowing glint in his eyes. "Lemon Drop?"

Snape took his usual seat and rubbed his forehead with his hand.

"I am looking for Harry, Albus. I cannot seem to find him and we were to move his things into the Gryffindor tower today. He has not contacted me in any way and I do not know where he could be, I have searched much of the castle. I know that he likes the astronomy tower sometimes and I even went so far as to firecall Hagrid! Do you know where Harry is? I saw him briefly at dinner, but then he was gone and I do not know where he went or if he is okay or who he is with or -." He realized that he was babbling anxiously and abruptly cut himself off. He fidgeted with the cuff of his long sleeved robe. He bowed his head. "I am worried."

Albus studied him for a moment and then a bright smile erupted onto his face. "Yes, I can see that." He said with a chuckle.

Severus scowled. "This is not funny, Albus. What if he is hurt and cannot get to the infirmary. What if he got lost in the dungeons - he really is no good with directions - or what if one of the Slytherins attacked him - they have not been taking the adoption very well and there have been some recent additions to my house, as you know. What if he is gone!" The potions master felt himself tense and his breathing became labored. "I do not know what I would do without him, Albus." He looked up at the old man in pleading.

Dumbledore stood and walked around the table to stand beside his friend. An old and wrinkled hand came to rest on Snape's shoulder. "He's in the library."

--

Harry rubbed his eyes trying to fight off the exhaustion and pain. His back was aching from sitting so long pouring over his potions text. Hermione had left with Ron over an hour ago, but Harry stayed behind knowing that he would have to be prepared for the next class taught by Sandra Higgnite. Then maybe she would cease with her harsh attitude towards him.

All he wanted to do was sleep.

He felt Snape's approach before he heard the soft footsteps. He turned with a smile to greet his Dad, but stopped short at the thunderous exression on the man's face. Harry's smile faded - he knew that look - it was the same one that Uncle Vernon had before dealing out punishment. Usually physical. Harry shrank back a little from the man's approach.

"Dad?" He asked uncertainly.

Severus pointed at him with an accusing index finger. "You - were - suppose - to - come - down - to - the - dungeons." He said, emphasizing every word. "Because - we - are - moving - you - into - the - Gryffindor - tower."

Harry relaxed slightly. That was all, he thought. By the look of anger on his Dad's face he had figured it would be something much worse.

"I was busy with homework." He tried to explain. "Professor Higgnite said I had to catch up in my free time and since I really wont have a lot of that anymore I thought that I would get it done through dinner."

Severus inacted a tempus spell without breaking eye contact with Harry. It read ten thirty, post meridiam. Harry flinched - no wonder his Dad was so mad at him.

"Look, I'm really, really sorry, Dad. I lost track of time, that's all." He tried a tremulous smile. The intimidating stance Severus had adopted put Harry on his guard. Years of abuse made his body react without coscious thought. His eyes going to every escape route to make sure they were clear while his mind calculated how long it would take Snape to reach him if he chose to act out the punishment there.

"Dungeons." Snape said with a low growl unaware of the affect he was having on Harry. "Now."

--

As Harry followed his Dad down the darkened corridors of the school he felt his anxiety growing. He knew - well, he was pretty sure - that Snape would not actually hurt him, but still he felt an almost overwhelming desire to turn and run away. His Dad had remained silent through the entire walk down to the dungeons, but as they approached their quarters he finally spoke.

"I am disapointed in you, Harry." He said quietly. "I thought you would know better than to just go off without telling someone. I was very worried about you." The last said so softly that it was nothing more than a whisper.

Harry felt like his entire world had come crashing down around him in a million pieces. He felt his heart stop for a very long second. All he had been able to hear through the roaring in his ears was Snape saying in what Harry took to be a defeated tone 'I am disapointed in you', the rest was lost to Harry. The teenager could not move. His father had opened the door to their living place and then he turned to see why the boy was not following.

"Harry?" The black haired man asked.

Harry could not move, he could not think and breathing was becoming a problem as well. He gasped for breath trying to forget the hurtful words that had cut straight into his heart. 'I am disapointed in you', these words kept replaying in his mind over and over until everything else was blocked out. How could Snape want him now? The teenager thought frantically. The adoption papers had not even been returned to them with official stamps of approval and already he had messed it up. How could Snape want him now - all he ever did was mess up. The Dursleys, Sirius, Lupin. Harry gasped for breath.

He could see his Dad standing in front of him, he could feel the hands on his shoulders, but he could not move. So much had happened to him in the past months and the one constant thing had been Snape. Granted, the man had moments of impatience and sarcasm, but the potions master had always been there to support him. Without that support to guide him, Harry did not think that he could have survived the aftermath of his capture by Lucius Malfoy.

"Harry! Breathe, everything is going to be okay -I'm here for you."

Harry felt himself enveloped in a hug, his breathing hitched painfully and he smelled the comforting scent of potions ingredients. He hugged the man back tightly and sobbed.

"I'm sorry, Dad. I'll never do it again I promise, just don't leave me, please, I'll be a good son." He cried in a rush. 'I'll do whatever you want - I'll never leave without telling you where I'm going. This will never happen again! I-."

"Harry." Snape interrupted pulling back. He shook the boy's shoulders gently. "I will never leave you, Harry."

Harry hiccoughed. "You won't?"

"No. Never." Snape said firmly.

"But you said I was a disapointment...and I thought that you wouldn't want me anymore. I know that I messed up and I'm sorry, but I just wanted to do my homework."

Snape bowed his head, veiling his face with long black bangs so that Harry could not see the look of pain that flashed across the man's face. When Severus looked back up his experession was calm.

"I'm sorry, Harry. I should have never said that - its not true. You don't disapoint me, you could never do that."

Harry's brow furrowed in confusion. "But you said?"

His adopted father shook his head. "I was angry and worried. I was not thinking very clearly." He took the boy by the shoulder and gently led him into their rooms and out of the cold stone corridor.

--

Harry sank onto the couch cushions and let out a relieved sob. Tears were still running intermittently down his face, but they were slowing. He wiped at them, trying not to feel too embaressed about what had just happened. He should have known better, Snape had never given him a reason to doubt. Every other adult in his life had though, he thought sarcastically.

Severus disappeared into his room for a second and when he returned there was a small vial of clear liquid in his hand. He handed it to Harry and motioned for the boy to drink it all.

"That is a calming potion. Not very long lasting, I'm afraid, but highly potent." The man sighed. "I am truly sorry that I was not more clear with what I meant. This unfortunate misunderstanding could have been avoided. I was just...angry."

Harry nodded. As soon as the liquid slid down his throat a peace and focus entered him. He could think about everything clearly and he smiled up at his Dad. The angst of mere minutes ago gone in the blink of a potion.

"It's alright, Dad." He said reasonably. All negative emotions drained magically from his mind. "I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions, but..." Even under the influence of the calming potion he felt his earlier memories of his Uncle make him feel a little nervous. "You seemed really upset for no real reason. It was just homework."

Snape bowed his head. His first instinct was to defend his angry remarks, but Harry deserved better than that. Much better. The man sighed.

"You are right, Harry." The man took a deep breath as he added. "I was very worried about you...son."

It had taken a lot for the man to say that. He had been attached to the young wizard for a long time now - months longer than Harry realized with his lack of proper time perception. To Snape it had been almost six months of constant worry and concern for the boy. Every day he had wondered if that would be the day he would hear from Dumbledore and everything would be over and it would be all his fault.

Now Harry was alive, he was no longer in immediate physical danger and Snape had let his anger get the better of him. He knew it was not the boy's fault. He knew that he had overreacted, but so many hours and days of his past months had been spent in constant worry over Harry Potter. Relief was short lived once the boy had moved in with him in anticipation of the adoption, they had both entered a deep connection. Every time Harry left his sight, Snape worried he might never see his son again. He had grown to think of Harry as a son...his son. The man shook his head.

"I'm sorry, Harry." Severus looked deep into Harry's eyes trying to convey the depth of his regret.

The boy smiled hesitantly. "You scared me when you started yelling like that...it...it reminded me." He breathed deeply to stave off another panick attack as flashes of his Uncle's "talks" reminded him of the painful past. He winced at the images and closed his eyes tightly.

"Oh, Merlin!" Snape exclaimed when he realized what the boy was saying. Instantly, the man was on his knees in front of the boy, his hands coming to rest lightly on the youths forearms. "I would never hurt you like your Uncle did. I thought - I thought..." His voice cracked. "I thought that you knew that by now."

Harry shook his head, unable to speak. He knew that the man kneeling in front of him would never do more than raise his voice on rare occasions. It had taken six month for something that dramatic to happen...Snape was so much better than Harry felt he deserved. Tears welled up under his closed eyelids and he cursed himself for being so weak. Why would Snape want someone as pathetic as him? He wondered with a sob catching in his throat.

He must have said it aloud, because Snape gathered him up in a gently hug, being sure not to aggrivate his back injury any further, and whispered softly.

"You are not pathetic." The man sounded like he was about to cry himself. "You - You."

"I killed Voldemort." Harry finished for him. "Why does everyone think that's such a great thing?" He pushed away from the embrace, he had wanted the reassurance, but at the same time thoughts of Volemort set him on edge and he did not want to be touched. He shifted uncomfortably as he remembered the Unforgivable surging through his skin and out through the magical conductor of his phoenix feather wand. He shivered.

Snape sat back on his heels giving the boy the room that he obviously needed. "You saved us all, Harry. Not just you, me, Dumbledore and everyone else in that room that night...you saved the whole magic world! How can you not see that?"

Harry still had his eyes closed, his tears had receeded somewhat and he felt more in control, but he was not ready to look into his adopted father's onxy eyes. He was afraid to see something there that might confirm his insecurities.

"Harry I want to show you something...open your eyes?" Snape requested softly. He did not want to push the emotionally fragile boy any further, but he needed Harry to understand how much he cared and why he cared so much.

Harry obeyed, it was second nature to just do exactly what he was told no matter what the circumstance, and he found himself looking into Snape's dark eyes. They were full of caring and hope and regret and something else. Something safe.

"What do you need to show me?" He asked softly, afraid that any second he would see the anger and disapointment he so feared.

Snape slowly pulled up the robe sleeve that covered his left forearm. The fingers of his right hand flitted over the pale, bare skin lightly. The potions master felt a thrill of awe at the sight - he always did. It would never cease to amaze Snape how liberated it made him feel to see the scarless tissue where once a reminder of his dark past had haunted him daily.

"The tattoo." Harry said softly, his gaze glued to the spot. He looked up then, confused. "That was Fawkes, not me." He said.

Snape shook his head and let the black fabric of his robe settle back over his arm. "No. All Fawkes could do was take away the pain...it was you, and the death of Voldemort, that removed the Dark Mark completely. I am free because of you, Harry. I owe everything that I am now and everything that I will become to you and to you alone."

"Is that why you're adopting me?" Harry asked saddly. "Because you think that you owe it to me?"

"No, I am adopting you because I ...I love you."

Harry felt his body freeze. The last time he had heard those words - in the graveyard after the Tri Wizard Tournament - it had been from the lips of his dead parents. No one in his life, not even his two best friends, had ever spoken those words aloud to him. He felt a grin break out across his face.

"I love you too, Dad."

--

Ron held Hermione's hand loosely in his own as they both watched their best friend unpack a second suitcase. They were standing in the men's dorm of Gryffindor tower.

"So, you're really back?" Ron asked uncertainly. "No more running off to get tortured by Death Eaters?" He joked weakly.

Hermione shot him a hard glare. "That's not funny, Ron." The young woman turned to Harry. "We are both glad that you are back. It's been...difficult without you." She admitted, her eyes bright with unshed tears.

Harry put his wand away and closed the suitcase, putting it under his maroon and gold colored bed. He sighed heavily and sat down on the edge.

"I'm sorry, guys." He said looking up. "I know that it has been hard on both of you." He breathed in a deep, cleansing breath. "But, yes, I am finally home."

It felt so good to know that he had been missed, that he had been needed. He stood and impulsively pulled them both into a tight hug, ignoring the protest of his back. He never wanted to let them go. He had his friends back, they were his strength, they had given him the self-assurance to reach this point.

"Thank you, Ron - Hermione." He said thickly, still not letting go of them.

--

Severus Snape leaned against the bench in his personal potions lab. He had been in there just staring at the stone floor for the better part of an hour, unable to turn his thoughts away from what had happened the night before. He had confessed his paternal love for the boy. He had actually said the words. He shook his head.

"Who would have thought it possible." He whispered to the empty room.

A year ago he would have thought it impossible to love again - and never in a million years would he have accepted the idea of Harry Potter as his son. That had been before. Before months of heartache and soul searching. Months of long nights where all he could think of was the boy lying in St. Mungo's...it had been his fault. Severus had blamed himself, but he had worked through the pain and regret to reach a place where he could truly come to love Harry. It shocked him and now he did not know how to deal with these new emotions.

Never before had he said those words: 'I love you'. His family had been more than nonverbal in their declarations of love, they were completely silent on the subject in words and in actions. Snape felt scared by the well of love that he felt for the boy who, only a year before, had been a bitter enemy. He would never admit it to anyone, but Severus Snape was unsure of what course of action to take.

How could he show Harry how much he loved him if he lost his temper at the slightest thing. Snape winced at the memory of his angry tarade the night before. It had been stupid, petty and unthoughtful of him, but Snape was so used to defending himself with sarcasm and anger. Love was a completely new place for his heart to visit. He needed a road map to help him through, but he had none. Albus was there, of course, but Snape knew that would not be enough.

As he stood there leaning against the lab bench considering the ways that his life had changed a pop announced the arrival of an apparator. His wand was in his hand and pointed in the direction of the sound before he could even turn to see who had arrived. Old habits were hard to break and as a former double spy, he had made caution and self-defense a habit. There was no one there, just a slip of rolled up parchment paper. He reached down and picked it up.

"I have a son." He spoke in disbelief when he recognized the approval seal on the paper. He stood in shock for several seconds unable to move. "I have a son."

The aproved adoption form slid out of his fingers and fluttered back to the stone floor.

--

Cool sunlight filtered through the window. It was raining again. Harry stood surveying the room he had just finished organizing. Hermione and Ron had went down to lunch early, but Harry had wanted to stay up in the tower a little bit longer. He wanted to see his father's map, but first he had to wait for everyone to leave and Nevil Longbottom was running late for the meal. The tall dark headed boy was lingering behind talking softly to himself as he watered several large and colorful plants. They were potted and set on a table next to the boy's bed.

"Are you going down to lunch?" Harry asked. After his argument with Snape last night he did not want to be late either, but the desire to see his father's map - to feel it in his hands - was too strong. "You'll be late."

Nevil looked up in surprise. "It's lunchtime already? I thought I had a few minutes." He finished watering the last plant and then carefully re-checked the soil in each to make sure that he did not overwater or underwater any of the precious plants. Everything seemed to be in order so the young wizard left with a parting smile.

Harry waited until he heard the portrait door swing shut before he went down and his hands and knees to pull up the loose floorboard. He could have simply accioed the parchment paper, but he wanted to feel the invisiblity cloak as he reached in. The parchment paper appeared blank, but Harry knew its secret. He brought it up to his chest and hugged it to himself, his thumb rubbing the tan paper lovingly. He bowed his head and closed his eyes, a single tear slipping down his cheek.

His father and mother would never know the pain he had lived through, they would never know his accomplishments. They were dead and gone. Another tear slid down his cheek and Harry held the map tighter against him. He never wanted to lose the last connection he had with his parents. Harry wondered if his father knew how important the map would be when he made it. Harry shook head, probably not, he thought.

The Maurader's Map.

The boy wizard thought about how ironic it was that although the Mauraders had began as best friends - inseperable and closer than most brothers - they had ended as bitter enemies. Their lives in shambles. With the death of Remus Lupin, the last of the four best friends, a tragic relationship had ended.

Sirius Black, imprisoned for crimes committed by Peter Petigrew, had lost twelve years of his life to the nightmare of Azkaban. Harry hated to think about those dark times. He knew that his godfather had endured more horrors and pain than anyone was ever meant to. The fact that he had went through more in his teenage years did not occur to Harry. All he could think of was the injustice done to his family. They may not have been family in blood, but in spirit he knew that Sirius, Remus and even Dumbledore would always be considered a family to him.

Snape. Well, Snape was different. Harry had never truly known his parents, but he had recognized the love he felt towards their memory was stronger than most. He was beginning to feel that same love towards Severus on certain occasions. Like the other night when they had been sharing cookies in the living room of their dungeon home. Their home...Harry reveled in the feeling of joy it brought him to know that he shared a home - that he, in fact, had a home.

"I have a Dad." He whispered to the map he still stroked lovingly in his arms. "A real Dad."

He knew that this would not be like the fake family the Dursley's presented to the world, but at the same time it was not quite the same as the undying love and desire that accompanied memories of his father and mother. This newfound relationship with Snape was different. Not better, not worse, just different. Harry smiled.

--

Hermione and Ron sat next to each other, whispering and writing quick notes to each other on a piece of parchment that lay on the desk between them. Each times their hands brushed against each other they would share a happy smile.

They were the first to arrive for potions class and so there would be a few more minutes without interruption...or, at least, that was their plan. A sharp tapping noise repeated at the front of the class caught their attention. Hermione's eyebrow raised.

"Hello? Is someone there?" The young witch asked.

The tapping continued, increasing in loudness as it grew nearer to their position. Ron gulped nerveously and his right hand inched down to the pants pocket where his wand had been carelessly stashed earlier.

"H-hello?" Ron called false bravado in his tone.

The sound paused, the silence almost as disconcerting to the teenagers, then it returned with even stronger fervor. The tapping increased.

"Show yourself!" Hermione demanded angrily, brandishing her wand with a dangerous flare.

"It's just me, deary. I didn't mean to startle you." Professor Sandra Higgnite said. The woman came into view through the door that led to her office, she walked down the short staircase and stopped "I'm trying some new spells for class..." She looked away. "My wand is not cooperating very well." The teacher admitted. "It rarely does."

Hermione lowered her wand and relaxed back into her seat. "Why don't you get a new one then?" She inquired.

Sandra huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. "The problem's not with my wand - okay, some of it is, but most of it's me."

"You?" Ron asked in disbelief, his mouth falling open. "But - but you're a teacher!"

Sandra laughed. "Yes, I am aware of that fact, Mr. Weasley."

"I don't understand." Hermione said. "How can you be a teacher at Hogwarts if your ability to use magic is retarded."

"Oh, it's just a bit of a hiccough, that's all." The Professor said with a brave smile, it did not quite reach her eyes. "Now, lets begin class, shall we." She asked the two students brightly.

Ron and Hermione exchanged glances. Ron looked around the empty room as if expecting to see the other students appear out of thin air. When nothing happened he leaned forward and said in a low voice.

"Umm, Professor, no one else is here yet. They shouldn't be for at least another ten minutes."

Sandra waved this away. "I know exactly when my own class is suppose to start, my boy." She laughed. "Let us begin."

When Harry walked into the potions classroom a few minutes later it was to find his two best friends dueling against each other using simple hexes.

Latin murmers sent sparks and jinxes spiralling above the desks. Harry found himself being pushed forcefully into he room - this sent a few painful chills down his back - when the other students made their way inside to see the practice duel. He shook off an unwanted memory of Lucius that surfaced at the treatment.

From what the teenager could see, Hermione had predictably gained the upper hand at some point and Ron had been forced on the offensive. The red head frantically called out counterspells and shielding spells at an impressive rate. Harry knew that Ron got a lot of practice defending himself from his funloving twin brothers, George and Fred, but it was still shocking to see his friend casting so quickly and accurately.

"Have a seat everyone. Good job you two." Sandra said with a wave of her wand. She was smiling brightly as the students jostled for a seat. "Very good."

Harry took a seat next to his two friends and smiled. "You two looked great." He complimented them excitedly.

"Excuse me, Mister Potter." Sandra appeared in front of his desk, looming over him and looking over her thin glasses. "If it is not too much of an inconvenience for your blooming social life." Her expression hardened. "No speaking after class has begun unless it is to ask a question. Did you have a question, Mister Potter?"

Harry shook his head - speechless. The temperature lowered when Professor Higgnite raked him from head to foot with her penetrating gaze. Those seated on either side of Harry shifted uncomfortably at the tense silence and Harry himself kept his brilliant green eyes averted. The very last thing he wanted to do was cause more problems for himself.

The animosity being directed his way made him remember the Dursleys and every other spiteful human being he had come in contact with over his short lifetime. It seemed like he never got a break. For once, he just wanted to be treated normal. Not like a savior, and not like a spoiled child, instead he wanted to be thought of as a normal teenage boy.

"I was just telling them how good they were." Harry said softly, with a quick glance at his friends.

Sandra's frown remained firmly in place. "Spell critiquing can take place after potions, Mister Potter. " She looked over the class and stepped away from Harry's desk so that her next remark encompassed the whole room. "We are going to study the affects potions can have on spell casting."

She spent the rest of the class time ignoring Harry's existence, he considered this little better than the harsh attitude the teacher had atopted earlier on his behalf. Harry felt his emotions start to get the better of him as anger and hurt warred inside his heart. He felt tears near the surface and tried to blink them away. First the teacher showed nothing but contempt for him and now she treated him like he was invisible. He hated the feeling of insignificants and rage this made him feel. A spark of magic brought to his attention that fact that any second he would lose it. He needed Snape.

He leaned over his desk and covertly wiped at his eyes, he could feel the skin on his neck and face heat up and knew he was blushing. Any second now he would lose control and then Professor Higgnite would have a real reason to come down on him in front of all the other students.

He had felt so happy that morning, so in control and calm. Now, a few hours later, he could feel a dozen different emotions trying to take control. He had to get out of there. He slid his books quietly into his bag.

"I've got to go see Severus." He wisphered to Hermione. "See you later."

He hurried out of the class before Sandra could stop him. Once out in the hallway the boy broke into a sprint. Each step jarred his back and knees, which were still in the process of healing, but he did not feel the pain. His magic was becoming more and more unstable as he hurried down towards the dungeons. He let his tears flow freely now - the halls were empty and he knew all of the teachers were otherwise occupied.

It did not take him long to reach the Severus' quarters. He paused outside the entrance and tried to make himself look less harried. He wiped the tears from his eyes, but they were immediately replaced by new ones. He ran tremblind hands down his robe and then realizing he was stalling, Harry pushed his way inside the room.

Severus looked up from the potion he was stirring when the door alarm chimed. While he had been employed as a double spy it had been prudent to install as many alarm spells as he could with the help of the Headmaster. The teacher had not taken the time to discontinue all of them. The door alarm was spelled for his ears only and he knew that it had to be either Harry or another teacher because of the pitch used. Checking the potion to make sure it would be alright, he stepped out of the room.

The man frowned at the sight of Harry standing motionless in the center of the living room area. The boy was pale, tears running down his cheeks, and Severus could see shivers running through the boy's body.

"Harry!" Snape rushed to the young wizard's side and looked him over for any injury. "Are you hurt, son?"

There was no response and Severus' concern deepend. He could see the desperate look in Harry's eyes and knew that another panick attack had been triggered by something. He placed his hands on the boy's shoulders and gently led him over to the couch. He seated himself facing the boy and let his hands fall.

"Harry, speak to me." He pleaded, his dark eyes searching the brilliant green ones opposite him. "I cannot help you if you do not tell me what is wrong." He prompted softly.

Harry let the voice calm his unstable magical core. Then taking a deep breath he tried to explain through his sobs. "It's that monster...she-she...I just wanted...It's not like I asked for it! For any of it!" The boy yelled angrily.

Severus felt even more confused. "I don't understand, Harry."

"Professor Higgnite." Harry clarified, his voice breaking. "She is complete monster!"

The father wanted to object, but he knew that in order to understand what Harry was going through he needed to be patient and listen.

"She is always getting on me about things. The very first day, she told me that I should not be expecting different treatment than the others. Then she turns around and doesn't give me a chance to catch up on my work. She said that I would have to make up my missed lessons in my free time. What free time?" Harry paused for breath. "I tried, I really did, but every class she gives me more homework to add to it and that made me miss our meeting which was almost a complete disaster because of her. Then today she acts like I don't even exist. What is her problem? She always talks to me with this horrible, cold voice. She would probably yell at me for breathing if she got the chance. I've tried to be patient about it and I've tried to be reasonable. Why me?" He asked suddenly. A final tear tracked down his face. "And she calls me Mister Potter."

Severus felt his mouth open and close a few times. He could find nothing to say in response to these accusations.

"Do you think I should talk to Albus? Has she threatened you?" The man asked finally in concern.

"No." Harry answered quickly. "Nothing like that. It is just that she treats me...well." He flicked his gaze up to look at his new father and then looked away. "Like you used to."

Professor Sandra Higgnite sat at her desk starring down at a stack of potion exams. Her last class of the day had ended several minutes ago and she wanted to give herself a moment before starting the correcting process. She rubbed her forehead. It had been a tough day, she thought exhaling loudly. Two potions had exploded - no one got hurt, thankfully - and one student had walked out in the middle of class.

Harry Potter. Sandra frowned deeply as she thought about the young man that had been the bane of her adult life. She was sure that the boy saw himself as some kind of hero. What with slaying dragons - she had read about the Tri Wizard Tournament in the Daily Prophet - and defeating Voldemort, there did not seem to be anything that the Boy-Who-Lived could not do. Jealousy at his naturally excelled magical talent also motivated the teacher's anger.

As a potions master, Sandra needed little magic to complete most recepies, because of this she had grown to be one of the best in her field. The woman had thrown herself into the subject with a passion, knowing that it might be her only chance to make it in the world of wizardry. A pureblood in every respect, Sandra had been horrified to find herself losing her magic as the years progressed. It was a rare magical sickness. Few wizards and witches even knew about it, but somehow she had contracted it during her early teen years.

Sandra pulled her wand out of her pocket and fingered it with growing sadness. Her parents had been devastated to find that their only child would be little more than a squib by the age of thirty. They had tried everything and spared no expense in a search for the cure. The Magic Sickness was the name an old wizard medic had given it. Sandra snorted and replaced her wand in a robe pocket.

"What a stupid name." She muttered at the desk. "Stupid name for a stupid disease."

She heard footsteps in the hallway outside and looked up just in time to see Severus Snape stalk inside the classroom. His black cloak and robes billowed in the wake of his stormy arrival. He walked up the aisle between the desks and came to a stop in front of her own desk. Black hair framed a pale, frowning face.

"Ms. Higgnite, I wonder if I might have a word." He said formally, his voice clacial.

Sandra shivered involuntarily and nodded, swallowing hard. The first time that she had met Professor Snape had been during her job interview. Since then, during their meetings, he had seemed a fine man, if a bit forbidding.

"How can I help you, Severus?" She asked cheerfully, trying to brighten the mood. "Do you want something to drink? I can have the elves get you a tea."

"No."

There was a long silence during which Snape stared at her unblinking. She looked away nerveously.

"Wh-What did you need?" She stuttered. The stare was beginning to unerve her.

"Why are you bullying my son?" He asked matter-of-factly.

"Bully?" Her eyes widened in confusion. "YOUR son? I didn't know you had a son. Is he one of the Slytherin I was teaching today?"

There had been several new arrivals in the Slytherin house that week. They had transfered over from another magical school and Sandra felt sure that she knew which one was Snape's son. A handsome darkhaired, lightskinned youth with a critical brow had been sitting in the front of class that evening. He had worn a Slytherin crest.

Snape smiled menacingly, he wanted to make absolutely sure that what he said next had the desired affect. He hoped that it would be enough to find out what had caused the woman to hurt his son in such a damaging way. Harry was down in their quarters in a potion induced sleep so that he could recover from the bout of nerves that he had been forced into earlier. Severus bit back an angry curse, he had warned Higgnite and all of the other teachers that Harry was to be handled with care. The man clenched his jaw to reign in his anger before replying.

"Harry Potter is my adopted son as of this morning and I would like to know why you saw fit to discard not only my own warnings, but Albus' as well in regards to his fragile state."

Sandra felt like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over her head. Never in a million years would she have expected that response. Harry Potter was the son of Severus Snape.

"Excuse me?" She choked out.

Severus growled. "Your insensitive remarks sent Harry into a panick attack earlier. You had better have a good explanation." He spit out the words."Or else."

Sandra gulped, not wanting to know what the "else" would entail. "I was just trying to maintain my sense of equality between students. Your...son." She stumbled over the word. "Should know that I will not let him get away with anything because he is a celebrity. He is still subjected to the same rules as everyone else."

"Celebrity." Severus murmered, an amused grin twisting his lips. He looked over at the teacher and smirked. "You should know that he does not consider himself any more a celebrity than you or I would consider Nevil Longbottom."

Sandra blinked, unsure of how to take that remark.

Severus summoned a chair to him and sat down. "You should also know that I will not allow anyone to hurt my son. He has been through so much already. He just woke up from a six month coma, for Merlin's sake!"

"Yes, I read about that in the Prophet. It said that he had recovered without so much as a bruise to remember the kidnapping by."

Severus laughed harshly. "That rag of a paper. You really should choose a more reliable source of information. While it is great for gossip and rumor, the Prophet has never been very big on truthful details."

Sandra shrugged uncomfortably. "To each their own, I suppose." She said quietly.

Severus gazed at her levelly. "Did you realize how much your conduct has hurt my son?" He asked getting them back to the topic of his visit.

"No...but I must admit that there was more to it than my desire to see all of my students treated equally."

Snape raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

Sandra shifted in her seat, rubbing her right arm vigurously as if to ward of a cold chill. She wanted to be honest with the man, but it could cost her the job she had coveted so completely. Her actions had been so juvenile and immature and as an adult and a teacher she knew that she had to face the consequences of her actions. She took a deep breath before admitting truthfully.

"I am jealous of your...son."

Severus felt himself at a loss for words for the second time that day. "Jealous?" He finally ground out in shock.

"Yes. He is just a boy and he has defeated the Dark Lord. He is an incredible young wizard with enough natural talent to trump most any wizard of this age." She hesitated before adding. "My own magic is barely measurable and in a few years it will not even be that. I have the Magic Sickness."

Severus' reaction was slow in coming. He had heard of the wizarding sickness, but it took his mind a few moments to come up with the desired information about it. When he finally realized what it meant, he felt himself pale.

"I am so sorry, Sandra." The man said softly. "I did not know."

Sandra smiled. "Of course you didn't, I never told you." The Potions instructor ran a hand through her brunette hair and sighed heavily. "I thought that if anyone found out I would be passed over for the position."

Severus was unsure of what to do with this new information about Sandra Higgnite. Her utter honesty left him a little off guard. He felt that she was not a threat to his son anymore. After all, her admission could lose her the postion as Potion Professor if he saw fit to report her. The dark haired man knew that he would not do that even as he considered the option. She had been up front and professional about it and he would do the same.

"I appreciate your forthrightness." He said. "Are you capable of changing your attitude towards Harry?"

She nodded. "It was never him I was upset with, it was his magical skills. I think that I can distinguish between the two in the future and I am really sorry for the way that I have treated him so far." She had the decency to blush and lower her gaze. "It won't happen again."

Severus thought about his son down in their quarters and the amount of emotional angst that he had suffered through that afternoon because of this woman's misplaced anger. "See that it does not." He warned darkly, his onxy eyes eyes drilling into her soul.

She gulped.

His mission accomplished, Snape stood and whirled about, his black robes billowing out to his sides.

"Ms. Higgnite." He muttered darkly over his shoulder.

Harry groaned and rolled over onto his side. He found himself, once again, waking up in the room that Severus had given to him. His room. A moment later his body began to protest to the abrupt movement and he groaned again in pain. His back ached fiercly and he had a vague impression that something bad had happened to him that morning. It took a few more minutes for his foggy mind to recall the scene from that morning.

He closed his eyes and slumped back on the bed. If Snape had not thought of him as a pathetic loser before, his conduct that morning would have surely proved to the man beyond a shadow of a doubt that Harry Potter was a sissy. He had cried, actually cried over a teacher's harsh tone. Remembering his complaints from ealier, Harry covered his eyes with his hands and groaned again. Great, just great, he thought miserably.

Deciding to face his fate, Harry got up off the bed and made his way into the living room area of the quarters he shared with his father. All hopes of moving up to the tower seemed dashed to a million pieces at the knowledge that a simple rude comment could send him back into a panic fit. With a heavy sigh he went to find Snape.

His father was not in the potions lab or his room. With a worried frown, Harry sat down on the couch. A plate of cookies, spelled to remain warm, sat on a low table nearby and he took one to munch while he waited.

Not long after that Snape came back. When he walked in through the door, Harry saw that the man had a thoughtful look on his face. He was so caught up in an inner debate that he did not at first notice Harry.

"Dad."

"Son."

There was a silence during which Snape looked Harry over carefully to make sure that he was alright. The boy looked a hundred times better. His face was a healthy shade and he appeared to be calm.

"Your sleep was undisturbed, I take it?" Snape said, taking a seat beside his son.

Harry scooted over so that he could lean against his father's side. The older man laid his arm over the boy's shoulders and pulled him close. Harry relaxed.

"Yep. It was a good sleep - for once." He joked with a small smile.

Severus took a cookie for himself and took a bite before saying. "I went to speak to your teacher."

Harry winced. "Professor Higgnite?"

The boy felt sure that she would truly hate him now if she had not before. The woman had been a good teacher and he did not want to get her fired, but at the time he had needed to tell someone about the monster...woman...teacher. Harry shook his head. She had probably denied everything.

'"She admitted to being in the wrong and has given me her word that nothing of the sort will happen again."

Harry's mouth fell open. "She actually admitted to it?" He asked in disbelief.

The man nodded. "Yes, she did. After everything that has happened to you, I do not expect you to trust the woman, but I do trust her if that is any consolation."

Harry sat back. "It might be." He said softly.

"Now, what would you like to do about the tower situation? I am willing to let you move up there with the condition of Dreamless Sleep if you think that you can handle it."

Harry hated to say it, but he knew that it was true. "No, Dad. I don't think that I can do it just yet. Everthing...reminds me."

Snape patted his son's shoulder lightly. "I understand. You can take as much time as you need to, Harry."

Harry grinned. "Thanks, Dad." He wisphered.

It felt so good to be this protected, this cared for. With a contented sigh, Harry let his eyes close and his body fall into a deep sleep. He knew that nothing could hurt him in this place, he had a father to watch over him.

Severus looked down at his son's sleeping face and smiled softly. He truly did love this boy. He shook his head, it was a wonder to him, but he was not going to question it. A new beginning had been handed to him by Fate and he would not pass it by. Pulling the boy closer, Snape kissed his forehead softly.

"Goodnight, son." He said.

With a sigh of contentment he lay his head back against the couch and let his own eyes fall closed. Seconds later he had joined his son in sleep. Both at ease and comfortable in the prescense of the other. They were a family.


End file.
